How My Kinky History Led to My Spanking Desires

Early in the days when I began my blog about three years ago, I posted my history and how I initially became interested in adult spanking. I wasn’t comfortable leaving all of the ‘dirty detail’ information on the blog at the time. I believed that my ‘kinky’ background might have been too much of a distraction from what was becoming my all-encompassing interest in domestic discipline. I didn’t want it distracting from my sincere desire to pursue a DD lifestyle and to promote the benefits. Basically, I didn’t want anyone thinking that just because I’m a kinky bastard I thought up some plan to legitimize my beliefs.

Backpedal a few decades and my journey into the world of kink and fetish was probably seeded in my experience growing up in the 50s and 60s. Not unlike many of those times, as a child I would often find myself face being held to the cold black and yellow bathroom tile floor with my ass propped high in the air. Natually, while my ass was being filled with warm soapy water. Squirming and fighting just got me the extra discomfort and humiliation as my bare ass was spanked for squirming.

No, it was not and should not be considered abuse. That doesn’t mean that I condone young boys being given enemas and spanked on the bare ass by their MILF mothers today, times have changed.

However during the 50s and 60s it was very common for mothers to give their little boys (or girls) an enema for many reasons. Everything from tummy-ache to being moody qualified for, if not required a physic. “Oh, Myrtle… If that’s the way he’s acting you better give him an enema. Everyone does need one now and again so it certainly can’t hurt”.

One thing for sure in those days, whenever you claimed in the morning that you were too sick to go to school you could count on getting a good inner ass cleaning with lots of warm water and ivory soap. The other possible outcome was a visit from the doctor and then you would likely get a nice sore bump in the buttocks from the doctors oversized penicillin injection. Doctors weren’t afraid of overusing antibiotics in those days you know. Worse case which was more likely, you would get a warm soapy enema and then the doctor would come to the house (they did that in those days) and still give you a painful injection in your poor overworked butt. It’s just the way things were done in those days.

Of course then I had to play and experiment on my own in those days, and actually often did. Yes, I’ll admit it; Mr. Happy and his needs became a big part of the action. You see men have a prostate and often any form of anal stimulation gives a little boost to… well you know.

Well I think I’ve explained it to a degree, the inner desire of being dominated and forced to take an enema by a woman was always in the back of my mind. Whenever I felt comfortable enough to mention it with a potential partner, the usual response was that the idea was at least distasteful if not "Oh, that's disgusting". Besindes, it's not something that's easy to bring up, it’s just not one of those things that you can use to start a conversation. In fact he topic usually ended conversation not being the sort of thing you should mention to people you meet in a convenience store or at the typical church social. Hence my reluctance to be open about it and also why I pulled the information from my blog.

Fast forward a few decades from my childhood, I had spent 20 years married to a woman who at first claimed to want to experiment with things of kink to add some spice. That turned out to be nothing more than a lie. My hopes of ever being open and active with her with that part of my persona were dashed by comments like "I don't know how people could do that..." whenever I hinted at things.

Ok, so why did I crave having a woman give me enemas? Particularly I craved being told I was getting an enema if I wanted it or not. In fact especially if I didn’t want one. It just didn't make sense since I had been told by people that claim to know these things that I was an obvious Dominant. Well, it could be that I can ‘Switch’ and just might enjoy every aspect of such a potential D/s experience. After being separated, I made up my mind that I would never again settle for anyone who wasn’t willing to explore whatever mutual fantasies we had without being judgmental. The obvious conclusion was that my childhood memories had awakened my aparent need to be a submissive.

Several girlfriends later, one night I was talking on the phone with the latest potential victim of my need for sexual relief. The thing was, I was doing laundry. You see at that time I was Mr. Mom and doing laundry was just one of those chores that I had a tendency to put off. The incentive that I gave myself to do laundry was simple; I would permit myself a martini per load of wash. After several loads of wash it was not uncommon for me to wake up and wonder what happened to my clothes. Not an uncommon side effect of martini consumption I understand, but I digress.

Well, feeling loose tongued and not really giving a shit if I scared her off… I dropped the big one and told her that I had always had a kinky interest in being given enemas. I fully expected to hear a click on the other end of the phone line. Nope, she told me it was one of her favorite activities. Actually I should have known, she’s an RN and there’s no doubt about it, RNs are kinky. Let the games begin!

The RN adventure was certainly interesting, neither one of us were really sure if we were Dom, sub or Switch so we played every which way we could trying to find out with "Screw the Roses, Bring Me The Thorns". One of the other activities that we explored was spanking. That’s when I found out that I really do enjoy having a woman laying over my lap getting a good sound spanking. That was also when I found out that I don’t enjoy getting a spanking quite as much as I enjoying giving one. There’s that certain aspect about getting a spanking that always comes up just after going over a knee. When the first fews smacks land then all of a sudden the brain feels the sting, instantly you wonder why you ever thought you enjoyed being spanked.

Once I had this new adult spanking experience it became all I could think of and I wanted more. Naturally I started searching the Internet for as much spanking information as I could find. When I found ‘Fondly and Firmly” I had an epiphany. Immediately I realized that the reason my marriage had failed was because I never gave X the thing that she needed most, a good spanking.

Having discovered the world of Domestic Discipline I joined a few groups and forums and before long I was IMing with a woman who lived a few states away who had the same sort of desires. We spent hours on the phone and became pretty close and shared our thoughts on how Domestic Discipline could or should work. Just as with the RN she shared a kinky enema thing so naturally conversation became even easier for us. With her help I decided to put my DD thoughts to the Internet and created my “How to Tell Your Thick Headed Hubby” blog post. She was an accomplished blogger at the time and encouraged me. Since, she has had some very difficult times and her blog is long gone.

The primary direction for the essay was ‘for a guy, from a guy’ since it appeared from many of the DD and general spanking forum posts that I read, women found it difficult to vocalize to their boyfriends or husbands just what it was that they wanted.

My blog post began to get some attention and it wasn’t long before I received a few comments from women who said that they printed out my “Thick Headed Hubby” essay and it made it easier to convince their husbands just what they really wanted and needed.

There it is!

That's how I began blogging about Domestic Discipline. Naturally several days ago when Minx spanked me and then slipped a Fleet enema into my ass, I began thinking about all of these things again and I decided to get over it, and re-post my background for my readers to know.

“There, now you’ll be able to enjoy your sore bottom on a nice hard seat for a while”

Being the typical non-typical DD couple things can get interesting around here sometimes. Of course we have the same problem that a lot of couples have, an almost perpetual lack of privacy. We might have changed that slightly, time will tell…

Today was the first day of a new schedule where I think I’ve managed to get things coordinated so that we actually have at least an hour and perhaps as much as two hours or privacy per day.

Well, we did have some privacy over the weekend and it did give me the chance to give Minx a pretty good spanking. She has needed a spanking for a while. Not so much for anything other than stress relief and just to reinforcing discipline a bit, she has been very good.

Minx also had the chance to try to spank me, but that didn’t go too well being the wimp that I am. I chickened out part way into it and got away from her which of course pissed her off a bit. It’s not easy for Minx to spank me; it’s just not her thing. Minx is much more comfortable being the spankee but she does try to cater to my cravings on occasion and if the need should happen to arrive, she has no problem at all giving me a punishment spanking. However, when I need a stress relief spanking, it’s not at all easy for her. There’s that role reversal thing, but also I’m much harder to hold in position when I start squirming and kicking as happened over the weekend.

Well, today our private time came to fruition and I had every intention to rebuild Minx’s leather butt. Since it’s been a while since she’s had regular spankings the spanking she got over the weekend was difficult for her re-virigned bottom. Being the caring HOH that I am, I planned on putting some regularity back into her spankings so it would be easier for her to take a good long spanking. You spankos out there know what I mean, if it’s been a while, it takes a while before you build up ‘leather butt’ tolerance again. Well, that was not to be.

I walked into the house and asked her if she was ready to get her leather butt rebuilt… however she said, “No, it’s your turn”.

Well, I hadn’t been too cooperative when she tried to spank me over the weekend so I suppose I knew it was coming so of course I complied. Minx told me to go pick out some implements…. Don’t you hate that?

I opened the toy drawer and looked, I knew that I would not be able to get away with a wimpy selection so I didn't try. I picked out the wicked hairbrush paddle, the sawed off bamboo bath brush, the Reb's OTK paddle with holes and the The London Tanners Domestic Discipline Strap. Minx approved, I knew I didn’t have much of a choice but to pick the ones that I hate since I hadn’t been cooperative for the last spanking.

Minx gave the quick simple order… “Drop ‘em”. I did.

There’s something that’s both intimidating and exciting about standing there with your pants at your ankle while your lady is picking up a paddle. Naturally, Mr. Happy was doing his best to embarrass me standing at full attention which of course Minx made some comments along the lines of ‘looks like he wants a spanking too’ and made some light contact.

When I first climbed over her knee, Mr. Happy was making things a little uncomfortable before he was properly positioned. Minx started with her bare hand, which felt, very comfortable and relaxing. Of course her bare hand didn’t last long enough, the sting had been light and actually somewhat comforting. Mr, Happy didn't stay around to find out though.

When I’m on the receiving end once the spanking starts I usually can’t tell what I’m being spanked with unless she tells me. She did a very good job of keeping me just slightly beyond the edge of what I can tolerate. You know, any lighter and you can take it, but just hard enough to keep you from ignoring it while you squirm and stress and have to work at staying in place. Then of course it had to happen, time to pay for not cooperating for the last spanking. Those hard heavy spanks that make you dig your fingernails into your palms and stress to stay in place.

I believe that the next round was from the Rebs OTK paddle and she kept me right on the edge with it. Then a few rounds with the DD strap and and paddles again. It was really getting hard to stay in place but I didn't want any more hard heavy full swing ones.

In between rounds of implements Minx rubs and comforts for a few seconds (always too few) which of course is wonderful. Then after a particularly hard to take round with what I think was the Bamboo Bath Brush she was rubbing my bottom and next I felt her spread my cheeks. I felt something slide into my ass and I realized what she was doing, Minx was giving me a Fleet enema.

“There, now you’ll be able to enjoy your sore bottom on a nice hard seat for a while”

She said it with a little bit of a happy accomplished tone. That wasn’t the end of it of course, but it was the end of the unbearable pain from that point on as I had another thing to keep my mind occupied. The combination of the spanking that so far I had endured along with that bit of anal stimulation and caress just made the sting disapear and all of me was enjoying the continued contact.

Minx continued to spank and she spanked hard but from that point on ,I just wanted more. She asked me a couple of times if I had to go yet, I could have but I didn't want to, I wanted to feel more and put off going to expell as long as I could.

Odd isn't it.

Now, I’m probably more relaxed than I’ve been in a while, maybe tomorrow will be her turn.

What a Weekend

Minx and I have known each other for about 3 years and have been together for more than a year now, in fact over 1 1/2 years if you count those things with vigor. For anyone who doesn't know... we've been more than just an item. Minx and I have been through some tough times together, tough times certainly test the temper of a relationship and ours has remained steadfast and perhaps only stronger.

Somehow, we still are in love.

No, not just the I'm a spanko and I found a like minded spanko so we'll give it a go kind of love... But, real love. Don't ask me why but on many levels it just plain looks like we were made for one another. It's just plain a good fit. Well, if you don't know it's a bit of an age mismatch, I'm a few years older than Minx. Well, maybe a bit more than a few... let's just say that since boys tend to mature slower than girls do, we found the intersection on that particular graph and we'll leave it at that.

This past weekend we found it necessary to make a several hundred mile jaunt to see relatives. There had been a death in the family and it's one of those times when relatives can't be avoided. Now for the uninitiated, let me tell you relatives can be the true litmus test of a relationship.

Don't get me wrong, I do not only appreciate Minx's relatives, I think I actually love them as much as that is possible. In fact it's not that they don't really seem to care that Moi... This dirty old man who spanks their daughter's ass red raw has entered their sweet little girl's life but they actually appear (at times) to be grateful. Sure, I've tainted her and soiled her otherwise pure heart and taken her to the far reaches of sexual extremes... Well, actually maybe she's done that to me. Yet, they still tolerate my being. Well, at least none of them attempted to murder me in my sleep, yet.

I'm a dog guy, always have been... always will be. I dunno, there's just something about dogs. We just connect, I understand dogs... their baser wants and needs. They at times only care about the man that will vigorously rub their breast bones (the same sensation they feel when they are humping) and rub behind their ears. It's kind of dog equivalent of being a man who can find a woman's 'g' spot. Well, in any event... usually after five minutes any dog I encounter becomes my life long friend... Except Minx's dog but that's only because he thinks he's a cat.

Couple of years ago I dated a lady who had a health guide dog. Whenever she was close to going into a pain seizure the dog would sense it and move or position her to a spot where she could be safe until the seizure was over. The dog was a VERY large German Shepherd and was VERY capable of protecting her... Well, not all the time. After first meeting them for a few minutes and saying hello to 'protection dog' I proceeded to spank her bottom raw and 'protection dog' didn't really seem to give a shit except for the fact that while I was spanking her, I wasn't paying attention to him. But I digress.

Being a dog guy somehow equates to being an 'a-oh-kay' guy as far as Minx's mother is concerned and that is the point that I've been trying to get at through this whole typing session.

When the weekend began we were outside and a (nosey) neighbor came by... I was introduced by Minx's mom as Minx's boyfriend. Before the weekend was halfway over my status changed, I became her 'son-in-law'. I liked it very much. By default Minx's mom declared me as being Minx's husband and that's a good thing. I'm sure it's only because I was well liked by the three dogs that were running around. Yeah, they're dog people.

Shut Up and Spank

I was just reading a post at Finding Sara about the issue of Consensual Non-consent. It’s one of those things that apparently many of us who practice a form of DD have decided on. Basically, the short version for us, is Minx has consented to be spanked whenever and however I feel she deserves it, and she can not refuse the spanking. With where we are now it’s a two way street. I too will accept a spanking from Minx if she feels I need it and here is the tricky part, there is no safe word. Sara did a very good job of describing the circumstances so I won’t rehash it in detail but there have been times when we’ve had to put DD on hold while we decided if this is really what we wanted. Just yesterday it looked like one of those times was upon us.

It wasn't during a punishment spanking since Minx has been very good lately. It was just your every day run of the mill kind of a combination stress relief and reinforce discipline spanking. The spanking wasn't very hard but it was rather long as that sometimes helps Minx get to a release, maybe a little bit of DD’ish subspace. I was sitting in a folding chair and Minx's was OTK and all the way down with her butt presented perfectly... If it had been punishment with faster and harder strokes the position would have certainly have left an "impression"... but it wasn't. Suddenly she yelled out "Stop torturing me!"

It's been awhile, so my first reaction was that we must be at one of those consent quandaries. Well of course I stopped right away, stood her up and we talked... It seems what was bothering her wasn't the paddle, but my questions! She wanted me to just shut the hell up and spank.

First time THAT has happened

Memorable Spanking

One thing that has become too obvious lately is that I've not been able to spank Minx the way she needs to be spanked. There are lots of reasons but the most common reason is the lack of privacy and with work schedules how seldom we see one another.



However, what has happened over recent months is her spanking sessions have gotten harsh with more intense implements, but too quick.

In retrospect it's obvious that I've been having a hard time spanking Minx effectively. Somehow I love her more every day and that makes it harder to truly spank painfully for an extended period. The point being, that is exactly opposite of what she needs.



She hasn't been getting corner time intermissions just OTK or pillows till done. She hasn't been getting the A.A.A.C. (Avoid At All Costs) Spanking when she deserves it. Well, that changed, she told me and she got the good spanking she needed. There was corner time and prolonged sessions with some of our more "memory making" implements and she was sore for several days.


I truely have to work on knowing that she needs more.

Reminder spanking would have been good this weekend but it just wasn't in the cards.

The Cure All

I was just watching the show "Manswers" which is a chauvinistic show designed to answer the weird questions that are always in the back of mind of the average American male.

Well, to sum it all up, men are pigs, no great revelation here.

Some of the topics being covered were "What odors will turn woman on?"

and

"In what country is a man most likely to be satisfied orally?"

The answer by the way is Austria, something about the love of sausage I guess.

But I digress…

One of the brain teaser questions was: "What is the best way to beat an addiction?"

Well, guess what...

Not a 12 step plan…

Not methadone…

The best way to beat an addiction happens to be… "Getting Whipped" AKA: SPANKED!!!

So, how does one get an insurance company to cover those therapy sessions?

In any event…

What an incredible revelation.

Geessseee…

All along we’ve been on cutting edge of medical science and have never known it. However, in the pursuit of nothing less than establishing a standard that includes exploring the unknown for the betterment of mankind...

We will pursue the exploration to find the edge of the envelope.

We will continue to explore the cutting edge of science and be there for any new developments. Perhaps it's time for a Federal Grant to determine what is the most effective implement…

It’s about time we get some Federal Funding in the Spanko World.

Could Submission Help Foster Feminine?

Privacy is such a rare thing for Minx and I right now. So, when we have it, we must use it even if the time may not be right emotion wise to address certain needs in a proper manner. However, we use what time we can in what ever way we can.

The other night Minx and I lay in bed and I rolled her over bottom up and gave her a warm bottom with hand and one of the light hairbrushes. It wasn't a spanking for a specific reason, nor was it very severe. Somehow I just thought it was needed. Her first reaction was "Do you feel better now?" referring to my obvious (biological response to having secured her submission for a spanking) pleasure while I spanked her. In response to her question I handed her the hairbrush rolled over and gave her the opportunity to have revenge which she too merrily indulged in.

When done I asked her "Do you feel better now?". She thought about it for a few seconds and completely ignored the fact that I gave her the opportunity to spank me and responded that it had been a while since she had a chance to feel submissive and feminine.

Tonight I came home and found Minx asleep on the sofa with the TV on... Butt in the air... Well you know what I did! Yeah, she jumped up and quickly sat up protecting her bottom from further immediate attention. Later I came over and gave her bottom more attention and remarked how we now had a Kodak moment candidate for the "Spanking Classics Red Butt of the Year" Award.

Actually, I believe she was again happy to have submitted for no other reason than to know that having submitted to my will that she be spanked made her feel more feminine.

What think yee?

Broken Cane

I’m about to tell some things about Minx and I that neither her nor I have ever discussed or "blogged" about before in any sort of detail.

Anyone who has read our blogs knows how I won't hesitate to spank her poor bottom raw...
Well, she just might very well...
No, ah shit...
She WILL be returning the favor.

Now those of you who may have read some on the things here, or particularly on my Yahoo 360 know that I am not your typical eyeryday found on any street corner Dom-ish Disciplinarian. If you know anything about me you’ll know that my first sparks into non-vanilla-ism was based on some deep seeded need to be submissive. Butt, then there were complications.

Well, like an experienced subbie friend who when I told her that I thought I had some dom-ish tendencies told me that she could tell I was a natural Dom but she knew I had to find that out for myself. Although my whole approach to LDD has been keeping it as far from BDSM as possible there are of course those other times when minds drift to the D/S aspects for any sort of play.

Well all of this gets so complicated and confusing sometimes…

There are times when I know that the label of switch suites me best. In any event Minx has known this about me from the start, or actually before the start and one of the first things that came up when we became an item was that perhaps a "Spencer" thing might work really well for us (at her suggestion). No, not that she has ever had any Fem-Dom desires but she does have a basic desire to give me whatever I might want or need.

Uh… is that bottoming from the Top or subbing from the side…
well…
who knows…
It doesn’t really matter in the long run…

Butt…

I resisted.

In hindsight not because I didn’t know that she was probably right but because I’ve spent an hour or two Googling "Spencer Plan" and have come to the conclusion that there is little if any evidence of it being any more than an urban legend. Some sort of well organized hoax story… great idea that it may be.
My resistance with time has worn away by my inner desire at times to be on the wrong end of the paddle, and to find ways to be closer to her.
.
Fast forward to a week or three ago…

On one of those rare occasions I found myself face down into the bedcovers with my butt propped high… Minx sitting on my back to hold me down and spanking the living daylights out of my poor ass. Yeah, despite underlying curiosities and all I don’t submit very well. Now… here’s the thing. Minx got VERY wet and I got very excited (read hard) about the whole idea.

So…
I told Minx that I was wrong to brush off her long ago suggestion and told her that yes, it might just be the perfect thing for the two of us.

Well, that of course means that at some point I have to get the same sort of AAAC (Avoid At All Cost) spanking that she has become very familiar with. Hard as it may be she has done her best to give me that spanking (Apparently I need to be restrained for such a thing). On the couple of occasions that she has tried to get us going on that track… I’ve resisted and Dom-ed my way out of those spankings.

The really scary part for me is that she has learned (first-hand) from our toy collection what really, really hurts. Oh yeah, she knows how to use them all including the old broken cane. Perhaps she needs to scold me into submitting without restraint. She did get me over some pillows and managed to land about nine really memorable strokes with the old (broken 6" short) cane. It was that last stroke, she was more adept with each one… Stroke number nine was extrememly painful and left my ass with a sore sport that lasted for about five days.

The whole experience brought to mind one of Minx's better quotes: "What the hell was I thinking when I decided on this whole spanking thing… I need a new hobby." (Scarlet Minx, 2008)

One of the unique aspects is that the whole time I may be thinking that a spanking may be enroute to my ass... I still have to be there holding Minx accountable... the double edged paddle of a Spencer-ish relationship.

I know how hard it is for Minx to even try (in spite of our recent discovery about it’s ability to get her wet).
Uh-Oh, did I somehow uncover a closet FemDom? We do have very little free and private time together, however I know the sooner or later the inevitable will certainly arrive upon my poor cheeks.

Thank you God for the gift of letting me have this woman in my life… I love her so much!

Minx my sweetie...

I LOVE YOU!

Mea Culpa

Kinda weird, yeah...

Well, Minx and I can't really always talk since there is the shift thing... So, dear reader... You are privy to see some first person communication between Minx and I !

We haven’t ironed out all of the specifics it will take quite some time I’m sure, but we do have a unique DD relationship since I happen to be a switch.

Sexuality can and does play into such relationships where it isn’t just one partner who could find themselves with a tender bottom. Yes, spanking in spite of the painful discipline aspect can be, and most certainly is an erotic experience. Giving control to someone you love is just one of those things… or having control taken by the one you love… same thing.

So, that means that Minx on many more than one occasion has managed to spank my bottom tender. No, she doesn’t have it down perfect yet, but she has gotten much, much more effective each time she has spanked me. If I have to crawl over her lap I do know for a fact that by the time it is over I will have a very hot sore bottom. In fact it’s gotten to the point where yes, sexually it is exciting to think that she can (and will) do it, but on the other hand it’s far some something that I would actually look forward too. Of course, she has had some of her best tutoring at me knee. She has learned how to spank very hard, very long and very effectively and we don’t really know what it is, perhaps a little bit of switch in her persona. Or, just the idea of being the wonderful submissive that she is, she is somehow getting into the roll and liking it as if I’m topping from the bottom. Butt, she is liking the idea of turning my bottom red and purple, perhaps a little too much.

Things have been a bit difficult for Minx and I for the past few weeks. I was sick, she had a business trip, privacy has been at a premium and this past week one of my sons broke a bone and needed surgery. So, it’s been hard to pay attention to one another and hard to have any time at all to ourselves.

Additionaly, it's not always easy for her to see how much she lights up my life when she walks in the room. You see, I've found my perfect love. How do I identify Minx as my perfect love? Two words, actually a name... Ronald Reagan. Yeah, I'm a Red State kind of guy and Ronny can in many ways be my hero. However it's the love of Nancy Reagan that I wish to speak about. Ronald Reagan was in the White House and his aide was at his side. Nancy came in to see him and they talked and kissed and she then left the room. Ronny watched her leave and then turned to his aide and said " She is the only person in the world who can make me feel lonely, just by leaving the room.". He was in love, really in love with Nancy. I always hoped I could find a woman like that. Praise te Lord and pass the amunition... that lady is Minx.

Well sorry to say, Minx it turns out has been pissed at me and getting more pissed by the day and the hour. Yeah, I’m a guy so at times I do bark a bit in spite of my best efforts to be patient and remain in control of my mood. Well, poor Minx, she hasn’t been taking it well. The result has been that she hasn’t felt that she could talk to me and she has thought that anytime I’m not happy and smiling it must be because I’m upset with her. Well that’s certainly not true. Still, I felt quite a bit guilty about it and of all things, she decided that I needed my bottom heated because of it. Ok, well… Yes Mam. I of course fell into super apologetic mode and became perfectly willing to jump over to my submissive side, because I must have caused this problem for this wonderful woman that I love so much.

Well, back to the scenario of not having the perfect time and privacy for each other. So, I told her that I would do something about it and make sure she could take care of things. We need more quiet implements. My once almost scary rattan cane broke to about a 20" stubby, perhaps a bit of a OTK cane but certainly not scary quiet welt maker. "Minx, we need some quiet devices. I’m going to make a Loopy Johnny so you can tear my poor guilty butt apart and turn it into red and purple Jell-O and me into a quivering mass of guilty remorse". Well I did say something like that, although perhaps I didn’t use those exact words but she got the idea and so do you.

So, I did it. I made a rather formidable loopy and quite frankly I have absolutely no desire to feel it’s bite on my poor bottom. I tried it on my thigh and it has no allure for my somewhat nervous ass. The handle has to be about 12 or 14" long and for the business end, I put the leftover from a bungee cord that unwillingly gave it’s life for this device. I did make sure that it would stay put, I taped the bungee to the end of the handle (which I notched for the cord) and then poured a bunch of super glue into the attachment to make sure that no matter how hard the little bugger ripped my quivering butt it could still survive and rip more butt. Oh, and then I found the remnants of an old fishing rod in the cellar and placed the two together on top of the dresser for her to use as best she saw fit. That effin fishing rod BTW is one wicked welt maker… We’re talking no sit for a week kind of thing.

So, all sorts of wicked tools are available at Minx’s hand for her to use on my poor doomed butt. What happened? Nothing. Yeah, and now I’ve decided that things have to go the other way… Minx is the one who needs to be spanked.

Here’s the thing. Maybe I was wrong, maybe I was too short with her. Maybe I was just too insensitive for her needs. Well, I went almost an entire day of doing the Mea Culpa thing… Then, well… If and when you are wrong and you are willing to accept responsibility and consequences for any possible wrongdoing…. That’s wonderful. However, your Mea Culpa needs to be accepted and eventually you need to be forgiven.

That did not happen.

Imagine me, trying to be submissive (as best I can) an almost sometimes Dom that I am, and asking for forgiveness… and not getting it. Uh, hello… how do you spell mistake and where was it made?

Ok, that went on for a while… times up.

Well Miss Minx…

You had the chance to forgive me as I would do in a heart beat for you… Butt, since you did not… Now, I think maybe, you were playing it for whatever it was worth. I think that maybe you were wondering concisely or not just what this role thing might do for you and I think that to a degree you were playing it for what it was worth and wondering. Nope, PMS is not an excuse. We needed to rest our heads on the pillow with things resolved, and that didn’t happen. Now, I’ve jumped back and I’m in HOH mode.

I’m just a little upset little lady.

Real or imagined, whatever has kept you from feeling open to me and not able to talk to me has done some damage and I will NOT let our relationship be damaged. Our relationship won’t be damaged by me and not by you… and certainly not by some sort of wall that I’m more than capable of, and willing to make endless efforts to tear down.

You, young lady will be getting a toasty warm bottom, you will not now or ever take advantage of my willingness to accept that maybe I did something wrong, then play it against us. Ok, maybe you did not, maybe you did but didn’t know it would have these consequences so maybe the sound spanking that you will be getting isn’t really fair in your mind. Well, it can’t always be fair and you do know that. However one way or another I will put an end to it, when it is done everyone and everything will be forgiven, period.

For one reason more than any other,

I love you sweetie...

Well, yeah back to the concept that you readers will know this as soon or sooner than Minx sees it. Yeah, who knows how she will read this. Butt, by the times she reads this the alarm will have gone off, she will have had a cup of coffee... So, before she leaves for work she will either come back into the bedroom and throw her cup of coffee on me, or... give me a hug and tell me she loves me too.

I'm betting on the latter.

Oh, BTW little lady, submission and maintenance spankings are back on as soon as, and whenever I see fit that they are needed, period.

Oh, Considering the season....
Mary Kate Danerher...
Do you go for it?

Belt and Hairbrush

Time and again when reading spanking oriented blogs or posts on spanking forums I'm amazed by the significance and the power of the belt. Simple device that it may be, somehow it has some sort of mystical power over so many women, perhaps some sort of symbol of masculine power. It would seem that many women have such a strong reaction, the butterflies in the tummy, the tinlge that runs up the spine and all from just the sight of the belt being removed or even more powerfully the sound of the belt being pulled from the pant loops. The sound can clear a brain in turmoil and stop all other distractions and it commands complete attenion.

Perhaps it's the sense of immediatecy, things will be dealt with now, right now and there is no point in trying to talk your way out. "Young lady, talk is over. Your bottom is going to be getting real hot and red right now and that's all there is to it". Conversely, for men who are spanked the sight of a woman with a stern posture holding a hairbrush has a similar powerful visual impact.

(art found at spanked hubby)

Perhaps it's the anticipation, perhaps it's knowing that there is no escape and the activity that is about to play out on one's bottom is inevitable. Whatever the trigger, the power of these sights and sounds is far more powerful than the sting and burn.

What do you think about when you see and hear these symbols? Do they get your attention unlike anything else?

Is One Enough?

You would think that after you have had your bottom thoroughly spanked and paddled that you would behave.

Me? Behave? Hmmmmmm

Well better to confess then to have him find out later.

I bought a cup of coffee that I knew I really should not be having.

I thought many thoughts as I was driving down the road with it in my hand.

Guilty, yes I did feel guilty.

Then to my surprise the cup sprung a leak and I am wearing a lot of the coffee that I should not have bought.

The rest of it is all over the side of my car.

Talk about getting caught red handed!

Guess I better go confess now.

Choosing Your Words

Lately it seems that anything and everything that could go wrong...is going wrong.

I have been arguing with my sister for a while now and yesterday being frustrated, I just wanted to give up, throw the towel in and just walk away.

Well….of course I verbalized “giving up” and got that the watch moved to the wrong wrist.

Sometimes it just seems easier to just give up but I know that I can’t. I know that in the end I will win, I will achieve what I have set out to do.

Today I was reminded that I can’t give up. Now I am sitting here typing this post with a very tender bottom.

I have a small problem with sass and it seems that most of my sass comes flowing freely when I am getting spanked.

Why that is I will never know!

You would think when you are OTK and being paddled that your words would be chosen very carefully. I was told that “I hope that I never have to spank you like this again.”

My reply….mind you that this was said in a sarcastic tone.

“Then stop spanking me!”

Honestly that was the wrong thing to say at the wrong time!

Yep, I still feel those four words.

The spanking I received today was one of the hardest ones I have gotten. That nasty wooden paddle with holes in it, OUCH! I was also spanked with that hairbrush paddle that seems to be a favorite...not mine of course.

But once again trouble has found me. Now you would think that having a very tender bottom you would make sure that you follow your rules and guidelines.

I am sure that once again I will find myself OTK sooner then I wanted.

Like maybe tonight again!

But...not me! That would be too easy...

I guesss I need to go confess now cause it is sure obvious!

The first time that I ever spanked Minx was a bit awkward. You see we are not very "public", no one in our real lives can know. Well, my middle son was on the way home. He knew that Minx was here and when I asked him to call me before he came home I'm sure he just thought that I didn't want to be surprised by him walking in on some sort of sexual action. Little did he know that Minx needed... and wanted a spanking. I was willing to oblige.

We've talked about it numerous times since then, it was very intense for Minx so we've tried to understand why. Pretty much your eveyday run of the mill spanking in most ways. I started her spanking bare hand OTK. She had been in the corner and I had been scolding her because of some of the things that I knew had been going on. Hmmm... her temper, some anger, some issues at work... patience with her family. Well, we had a lot to talk about and I actually did the talking with the contact of my hand.

Minx was squirming a lot... I knew she had to be thinking "Oh S***!, If this is what his hand feels like the paddle is really going to be wicked!!!" Well, it was :)
Naturally and thankfully, we managed to time an intermission for when my son came home. Well, he's old enough to die for his country and old enough to choose his own evening activities and was right back out the door after a shower, ah the freedom of youth.it's wasted on the young.

When we alone again, we continued. We had been doing a lot of talking and at the appropriate time I told Minx to get back to the corner (not really a corner but close enough). She hesitated. I should never have to give an instruction twice, especially during a punishment. Yup, immediately after her corner time her hands were on the couch, dress up, pantyhose and then panties tugged down... and then she heard my belt coming out of my pant loops. You know, then and everytime since then... Well, there's just something magical about that sound that says "There will no BS, we're dealing with this now!!!"

We both believe that the panyhose she was wearing really, really held the heat in and enhanced the sensation. In any event when the hairbrush paddle came out to find her bare bottom it didn't take long before I could sense her surrender... the first time her walls started to fall.

The absolute most exciting part of a spanking is the tenderness of aftercare. I'm not new to spanking, I've toasted a few butts before. This time things were different, I didn't just feel the intensity of her hugs after the spanking was over, this time it seamed like we melted together into one being. It's been that way with her ever since too.
Anything and everything has come out with this sweet wonderful woman. She has the key to my heart. God, I love this woman, why did it take so long for her to find me :)

It Can’t be Only Physical Pain

It’s not uncommon for many people these days to establish an online relationship where one or both parties crave the experience of spanking. What can and does happen is both parties become anxious for a date and both arrive not just wanting, but more aptly craving things to progress quickly. Things can and do progress quickly. Inhibitions were probably already removed from the matchmaking equation days or weeks before with long online chats and phone calls. Naturally as can be expected, the basic desires overrule any common sense and the couple rushes to privacy where the fantasies can be fulfilled in the hastiest fashion.

While lying across this man’s knee she begins to realize that this is finally going to happen. This man is going to be taking control and he has every intention of seeing that she is properly spanked for the things that she wants to be held accountable for. This man knows that this woman craves to feel her bottom sting and burn and he will see to it that she gets exactly what she wants.

As the volley of spanks progress she begins to wonder why the hell she ever thought that this was what she wanted. Before long her bottom is stinging worse and worse from the relentless smacks and she just can’t take much more. She keeps waiting for that magic moment to arrive, the pain is unbearable and is rapidly getting intolerable. Everyone on all of the discussion boards always talk about how wonderful it is to be in this position being taken over knee and getting a sound spanking and she can’t imagine why she isn’t feeling the wonderful things that she heard of and dreamed about. What’s wrong, why isn’t it wonderful for her?

Another Experience
This time it’s different, she knows that she has disappointed this man and she can’t imagine why or how she could have been so foolish as to do the things that she has done. This man, who she has come to realize, cares so much about her. He often seems to care more about her than she cares about herself. Now, she’s done it, with her actions she hurt this wonderful man. It’s so different this time, the remorse is real. As ordered she lifts her head and looks into his eyes and sees his pain, his disappointment cuts deeply. Her eyes are welling up and a tear rolls down her cheek. She obeys and hands him the hairbrush and lays across his lap, she wants the spanking to start now, she wants it to be everything she deserves, now she craves and prays for his forgiveness.

As often as she may wish to feel the sensation of losing control, as often as she may dream of having control taken from her. As often as she may crave to feel herself in the zone of knowing that there is absolutely nothing she can do to stop the painful spanking that she knows she wants and deserves, it could be meaningless without one ingredient. That one ingredient would be knowing that she's disappointed someone besides herself. It could be the one item that will help take her to where the stinging pain of a spanking becomes a secondary, it no longer can sting too much. Where the wall falls down and emotions that have built up can come pouring out.

Perplexing

What seems to perplex many people is why is it that they feel the desire to be spanked. How can it be that many of these same people may never have had the experience of having been spanked as an adult, or for that matter some were never spanked as a child either, yet they crave it so intensely.

What’s truly ironic is that society today has taught us that we should feel free to practice our lives however we wish, yet at the same time has told us that the act of giving yourself to someone else to help provide discipline is wrong. It’s really surprising that those who often profess to be so tollerent and open minded are unwilling to understand that a woman, or for that matter sometimes a man would willingly submit to physical discipline from a partner. I suppose the simple fact is they just can’t seem to understand is that the basic act of submitting to a spanking from a partner can, and often does make a person stronger and renewed.

Properly done, a good spanking can leave your bottom quite warm and sore to the touch. In fact several hours later you may still feel that your skin is hot to the touch and, at that time it may actually be more tender than it was just a few moments after the spanking was over. Of course when the spanking is over there are other things happening that mitigate the pain. Your body has reacted to the assault on your bottom by releasing it’s own very effective pain killers. Additionally if the spanking was done properly, your thoughts are preoccupied with the intense emotions that are flowing through your head. But more importantly you are experiencing the intense dependence on the spanker who is continuing the experience with proper aftercare.

“It’s All Over”, “Everything is Forgiven”, “Everything Will be All Right”…Those words are just as important to hear and as needed as is the feeling of the arms that are cuddling you and just won’t let go. Those arms that moments earlier were occupied giving you an intense experience with a relentless sting are now providing an immeasurable comfort. Someone else, hopefully someone you intently love has given you the gift of caring about you, caring about your well being, caring about your behavior and helping you to reinforce your own confidence, by demonstrating to you, that you are important to them. Rebuilding the strength that is often the core of the submissive partner’s personality.

The Mentor and Spankee

"My bottom smarts"
"it stings so bad"
"It burns and hurts"
"I can't sit..."

So many women want to be able to say these things. It’s absolutely amazing how many women want to be disciplined and actually spanked till they can't think of anything else. They want to be spanked. They want a man who will take control and teach them to be submissive to his authority in a relationship.

But...
It just doesn't happen that way. For as hard as it is for a man to find a woman who wants to be spanked, it's just as hard for a woman to find a man that she can tell that she needs to be spanked.

So, many women while wanting to find a head of household actually find a Dom. That can be all well and good, or it could be a nightmare. He may work out to be the perfect solution or he may treat her as a doormat which may be the last thing she wants.

As I've posted before it's not domination that makes a good HOH, rather honorable character, integrity and consistency. It would seem that most people have a common view that respect must exist by and between both parties. How can you have respect without those precious traits.

However wherever or however you find these things people should always take every conceivable caution especially for that first time meeting if between a would-be Mentor and Spankee. Discuss it all and understand every step, ask and answer all question even the tough ones. Protect yourself with a call from a friend that knows. Nothing new, but when it feels like it's going to happen all caution goes to the wind, be smart and avoid that error.