LDD-4-Me

I Miss You My Darling

2011-11-27T23:59:00.003-05:00

In Memory of Ben 07/24/1955 to 06/11/2011

Hello Ben

It has been quite some time since I have seen you, spoken with you, listened when you spoke to me. I miss you so much it kills me inside. I decided to get out my emotions tonight and post them here on your/our blog.

We met here at this blog many years ago. I lived a few thousand miles away an I never thought I would get the chance to meet you. We chatted for hours and told each other our deepest secrets trusting one another. We also knew we would never meet. This was an online friendship, you became my best friend.

Then we met, it was love at first sight. I knew that first night I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. You told me that is how you felt too. You asked me to marry you, become your wife. You told me just how much you cherished me. You promised me you would never leave me, that you would always be here for me.

I have been very angry since you left. I can not seem to pick the pieces of my life back up and put them together.

I wanted more time together with you, I needed more time together with you.

I miss you so much my darling..I am so very sorry you became ill. I tried my best to care for you. Then that devastating morning when you woke and I knew...

You left us too early..your sons miss you too.

Ben..I love you, you were 55, far too too young to have a massive stoke.
I was there with you when you took your last breath. For now this is all I can tell you my sweetheart. I am in tears, I Just Need You Now.....

I Love You Ben
You Woman the SassyMinx

Mainstream Spankos

2010-06-15T13:46:00.000-04:00

Bogey and Becall at Our Bottoms Burn linked to a surprisingly well done article at Fox on Sex about spanking.

I remember some sort of survey a while bak that I quoted in a previous post about how worldwide 20% of consenting adults are spankos. However, in the US for some reason that number rises to something like 40%.

Can't help but wonder what makes the US so spanko-able.

2010-05-20T23:10:00.000-04:00

Ok, I did it now.

I told Minx that she forgot...
Severa..."l weeks ago.. she called Top.

She got pissed at me, for good reason.
She forgot about it.

She said: "You wait till Friday, you're really going to get it...."

So, I've been waiting for that.

She called 'Top', and I do give her that authorithyto do so. Well, we will see if she actually takes advantage of that.

Me?
Well I suspect that if she ever does realize how much authority I've given her... Then my butt is a gonner... but we will see...

Less Than a Day, Gotta Hurry

2009-12-06T15:26:00.001-05:00

I was meaning to post a link to this a week or three ago and forgot all about it until I just saw AngelBrat's link to it. If you haven't put in an entry to Name This Paddle times-a-wastin' folks.

From all accounts John at Leatherthorn Paddles does some very nice work, although Santa hasn't left any under our tree yet.

Hopefully, one of my entries will be the Grand Prize winner for a free paddle, although in all honesty I'd rather hit PowerBall and order my own damn paddle!

Yeah, She Got Me Good... Damn Spoons

2009-11-19T23:59:00.003-05:00

Ok... I am HOH. However, I do agree to be submissive to Minx on a few items. I don't have a lot of rules, but there is no doubt that if I break a rule, I have to pay. Very simple, well I didn't know when or if I would pay actually.

Complications of lack of privacy mean that most of the time we can't just can't respond when it's needed in the way it's needed. however, that wasn't going to stop Minx.

It's true, I deserved a spanking. The odd thing is that for some silly reason I thought she wouldn't realize it, or if she did that she wouldn't act upon it... Silly (stupid) me !!!

Unfortunately, we've discovered a virtual cornucopia of implements that can cause excruciating pain yet shout little evidence of their use the silly quiet things tht they are.

The Cane.

The cane can be very wicked yet quiet, unfortunately Minx is learning how to use it more effectively every time she picks it up. Yes, she had me in the diaper position and she really needs to understand that such things are best for her to be in, not me.

Whereas the cane is pretty much right now pain, the DAMN wooden spoon that is too quiet to be noticed is something that Minx should not be allowed access to. Yes, she got me good and I was able to feel the result for two days.

Now since she hasn't been paying attention to spanking blogs for a while now, it could be a while before she knows. I just got another notice from my bank that yet again, I went into overdraft (and fees). Well, she won't be happy about it that's for sure, but hopefully I'll have earned some brownie points by then. Hell, I washed the damn kitchen floor yesterday! That has to be good for some points... Right?

I love this woman.

Meeting People

2009-11-13T20:56:00.002-05:00

We all have some sort of idea or suspicion as to just what might have happened to ‘Spanked Hubby’ as to why he shut down his well known and popular blog. Most of it might center around what were probably some bad experiences meeting other spanking couples. My best guess is that one of the couples that he met with, were more extreme players than he was used to meeting with or had ever encountered. He in turn flamed them (her in particular). Then, probably encountered some sort of a shit-storm as backlash from the flaming.

(free photos from http://women-spanking-men.com/)

Well, none of us ever wants to encounter a shit-storm. There is no doubt that when the smelly stuff hits the big round spinning thing that pushes air the best place to be is somewhere else. So, why would anyone ever pursue a potential shit-storm?

Good question but I do sometimes, as I’m sure many of us do.

I contacted a couple that had posted that they were looking for like minded people. In any event the couple is somewhat new and might be more BDSM-ish than we are. Not that Minx and I can’t get into some light and sometimes heavy aspects of BDSM, but it’s not the primary interest of either one of us. Basically, we spank.

Unlike many DD couples ours is somewhat of a ‘Mutual’ DD. I can, and do willingly climb over Minx’s knee if she should decide that I need a spanking. When she does decide that it’s needed, I of course consider it indisputable by the way. That does make us a bit unusual as many who practice DD are male-led. Certainly of course there are a few female led couples out there, but apparently damn few mutual DD couples.

In any event, the couple I was considering meeting happens to be Female led which I have no problem with. Part of the conversation that came about was the possibility of both men being spanked by both women. Well, like any man, I’ve wondered and fantasized what it would be like to be with two women for anything and that includes spanking.

One potential stumbling block that came to mind to me was that once long ago Minx had asked me for permission to spank someone she knew from before we were an item. I forbade her from doing so, and it was no big thing at the time as she didn’t expect I would say yes before she even asked. I kind of think she wanted and needed me to say no. But I imagine she had promised that she would at least ask and I respected that but said no..

So now, I had to wonder. Would me telling her that we could or should spank with another couple fly in the face of the time that she asked and I said no as being contradictory. In any event, I wasn’t completely comfortable with the concept and again finally said no. Good thing too, since Minx thought the whole idea was simply to befriend another couple and didn’t include anything beyond that.

We’ve talked some about going to spanking events and finding others like us but of course situations and finances have always prevented it. I’m wondering, what is behind my desire to seek out others? Perhaps it’s the need to know that somewhere, there are others just like us and somehow that meeting them will make us more normal. Then again I have to wonder, having been ‘normal’ and hating it for so much of my life…

Why the hell do I ever want to be normal again?

2009-09-19T01:20:00.001-04:00

I stole this question from a forum, it's a good one.

She said:
I have been reading a lot lately about LDD. Fascinated by it really. I am currently unattached and single, and have been wondering if it is a lifestyle that I could function in and be happy in, without being resentful towards a future husband.

How you do or can form it with your future mate is best served by constant communication and the development of trust. When you can truly be your SO's friend and have trust, you will be able to talk and make anything that comes your way work, because you trust them..

IT seems that all (or at least most) LDD households are Christian, or at least church, based. I am curious if this is in fact the case, or it is a conclussion I have made.

LDD is just an abreviation for DD or D/s where the concept of Love is stressed. If you choose and want your DD life to be based on Christian principles, so be it as your choice. However, there is no 'member test', well if there is, it's on a curve and the curve adjusts to whatever YOU want it to be.

I am also curious as to how you started this relationship (LDD) at the outset. Did you start with a few rules, then add more later one, or was it all at once. I realize that the rules set by each couple vary and are determined by their needs and wants. I guess I'm asking for opinions as well as your experiences with it.

Yes, you understand. In our particular case we started with and basicly stick with matters of Attitude, Respect and Responsibility.

I believe that DD is and can and should be flexible enough that you can adapt it to whatever lifestyle you want and need.

Bingo Babe, you got it and understand !
***************************************************

My basic post on the subject which explains much of what I believe can be found at: http://ldd4me.blogspot.com/2006/07/how-to-tell-your-thick-headed-husband_04.html

The thing is, for me LDD is just D/s or DD or whatever you want it to e within a relationship where love is the foundation. In other words by my definition it does not have to be anything that you and your SO decide you don't want it to be, you don't have to match some arbitrary standard that has been estalished y someone else. YOU estalish the standard to which yuo live.

You roll your own, and your mileage may vary.

How My Kinky History Led to My Spanking Desires

2009-09-16T09:23:00.005-04:00

Early in the days when I began my blog about three years ago, I posted my history and how I initially became interested in adult spanking. I wasn’t comfortable leaving all of the ‘dirty detail’ information on the blog at the time. I believed that my ‘kinky’ background might have been too much of a distraction from what was becoming my all-encompassing interest in domestic discipline. I didn’t want it distracting from my sincere desire to pursue a DD lifestyle and to promote the benefits. Basically, I didn’t want anyone thinking that just because I’m a kinky bastard I thought up some plan to legitimize my beliefs.

Backpedal a few decades and my journey into the world of kink and fetish was probably seeded in my experience growing up in the 50s and 60s. Not unlike many of those times, as a child I would often find myself face being held to the cold black and yellow bathroom tile floor with my ass propped high in the air. Natually, while my ass was being filled with warm soapy water. Squirming and fighting just got me the extra discomfort and humiliation as my bare ass was spanked for squirming.

No, it was not and should not be considered abuse. That doesn’t mean that I condone young boys being given enemas and spanked on the bare ass by their MILF mothers today, times have changed.

However during the 50s and 60s it was very common for mothers to give their little boys (or girls) an enema for many reasons. Everything from tummy-ache to being moody qualified for, if not required a physic. “Oh, Myrtle… If that’s the way he’s acting you better give him an enema. Everyone does need one now and again so it certainly can’t hurt”.

One thing for sure in those days, whenever you claimed in the morning that you were too sick to go to school you could count on getting a good inner ass cleaning with lots of warm water and ivory soap. The other possible outcome was a visit from the doctor and then you would likely get a nice sore bump in the buttocks from the doctors oversized penicillin injection. Doctors weren’t afraid of overusing antibiotics in those days you know. Worse case which was more likely, you would get a warm soapy enema and then the doctor would come to the house (they did that in those days) and still give you a painful injection in your poor overworked butt. It’s just the way things were done in those days.

Of course then I had to play and experiment on my own in those days, and actually often did. Yes, I’ll admit it; Mr. Happy and his needs became a big part of the action. You see men have a prostate and often any form of anal stimulation gives a little boost to… well you know.

Well I think I’ve explained it to a degree, the inner desire of being dominated and forced to take an enema by a woman was always in the back of my mind. Whenever I felt comfortable enough to mention it with a potential partner, the usual response was that the idea was at least distasteful if not "Oh, that's disgusting". Besindes, it's not something that's easy to bring up, it’s just not one of those things that you can use to start a conversation. In fact he topic usually ended conversation not being the sort of thing you should mention to people you meet in a convenience store or at the typical church social. Hence my reluctance to be open about it and also why I pulled the information from my blog.

Fast forward a few decades from my childhood, I had spent 20 years married to a woman who at first claimed to want to experiment with things of kink to add some spice. That turned out to be nothing more than a lie. My hopes of ever being open and active with her with that part of my persona were dashed by comments like "I don't know how people could do that..." whenever I hinted at things.

Ok, so why did I crave having a woman give me enemas? Particularly I craved being told I was getting an enema if I wanted it or not. In fact especially if I didn’t want one. It just didn't make sense since I had been told by people that claim to know these things that I was an obvious Dominant. Well, it could be that I can ‘Switch’ and just might enjoy every aspect of such a potential D/s experience. After being separated, I made up my mind that I would never again settle for anyone who wasn’t willing to explore whatever mutual fantasies we had without being judgmental. The obvious conclusion was that my childhood memories had awakened my aparent need to be a submissive.

Several girlfriends later, one night I was talking on the phone with the latest potential victim of my need for sexual relief. The thing was, I was doing laundry. You see at that time I was Mr. Mom and doing laundry was just one of those chores that I had a tendency to put off. The incentive that I gave myself to do laundry was simple; I would permit myself a martini per load of wash. After several loads of wash it was not uncommon for me to wake up and wonder what happened to my clothes. Not an uncommon side effect of martini consumption I understand, but I digress.

Well, feeling loose tongued and not really giving a shit if I scared her off… I dropped the big one and told her that I had always had a kinky interest in being given enemas. I fully expected to hear a click on the other end of the phone line. Nope, she told me it was one of her favorite activities. Actually I should have known, she’s an RN and there’s no doubt about it, RNs are kinky. Let the games begin!

The RN adventure was certainly interesting, neither one of us were really sure if we were Dom, sub or Switch so we played every which way we could trying to find out with "Screw the Roses, Bring Me The Thorns". One of the other activities that we explored was spanking. That’s when I found out that I really do enjoy having a woman laying over my lap getting a good sound spanking. That was also when I found out that I don’t enjoy getting a spanking quite as much as I enjoying giving one. There’s that certain aspect about getting a spanking that always comes up just after going over a knee. When the first fews smacks land then all of a sudden the brain feels the sting, instantly you wonder why you ever thought you enjoyed being spanked.

Once I had this new adult spanking experience it became all I could think of and I wanted more. Naturally I started searching the Internet for as much spanking information as I could find. When I found ‘Fondly and Firmly” I had an epiphany. Immediately I realized that the reason my marriage had failed was because I never gave X the thing that she needed most, a good spanking.

Having discovered the world of Domestic Discipline I joined a few groups and forums and before long I was IMing with a woman who lived a few states away who had the same sort of desires. We spent hours on the phone and became pretty close and shared our thoughts on how Domestic Discipline could or should work. Just as with the RN she shared a kinky enema thing so naturally conversation became even easier for us. With her help I decided to put my DD thoughts to the Internet and created my “How to Tell Your Thick Headed Hubby” blog post. She was an accomplished blogger at the time and encouraged me. Since, she has had some very difficult times and her blog is long gone.

The primary direction for the essay was ‘for a guy, from a guy’ since it appeared from many of the DD and general spanking forum posts that I read, women found it difficult to vocalize to their boyfriends or husbands just what it was that they wanted.

My blog post began to get some attention and it wasn’t long before I received a few comments from women who said that they printed out my “Thick Headed Hubby” essay and it made it easier to convince their husbands just what they really wanted and needed.

There it is!

That's how I began blogging about Domestic Discipline. Naturally several days ago when Minx spanked me and then slipped a Fleet enema into my ass, I began thinking about all of these things again and I decided to get over it, and re-post my background for my readers to know.

The Kitten Complications

2009-09-14T11:55:00.000-04:00

If you have a blog here with Google Blogger and you have content that is less than vanilla save yourself some trouble and turn on the adult "Content Warning" page in your settings.

Complicated Kitten was locked out of her blog and now has a new blog started that can be found here. at http://acomplicatedkittensjourney.blogspot.com/

It certainly would be nice if the Adult Content Warning would store a cookie and once I answered yes it would remember for all of the other blogs I visit.

Loving Domestic Discipline v 3

2009-09-14T03:34:00.001-04:00

(This is an update of one of my first blog posts. The 3rd time I've added to it, so the v3)

The thought of a DD or Loving Domestic Discipline relationship has captured me. I've come to the conclusion that I will never again settle for anything less in a relationship. It's what I seek, it's what I crave and the only way I will ever have the perfect love and now it's what I've found.

I'm certainly not the only person with this opinion, in fact I'm more amazed every day as I find out about more and more people who are "de-lurking" and "coming out".

I read a number of blogs about DD on a regular basis and some message boards such as Spanking Classics Story Board and on a regular basis there are a number of people who sign on and say they've been reading for some time (lurking) and they've finally decided to join the board and take part in the discussion. Some say they have just started, or wish they could start a DD relationship with their spouse. Additionally there are people who sign on and say they and their spouse have been practicing a DD relationship for years. Who ever knew.

What has the concept of LDD done for me?
I would have to say that Domestic Discipline has had a tremendous impact on my life. Most of all I'm totally amazed at how natural it all seems. Also, I have to admit that because it never was a part of my life, I never did understand the women in my life and what was missing from our relationships. It has taught me what was missing from my marriage, and why it failed. It has taught me that the emotions that so fill a woman’s soul, the things that define her femininity are the hardest things that she deals with, and sometimes she just needs a release. She needs her man, to be a man.

The primary desire most people have for a Domestic Discipline relationship is to form a stronger bond. To fill a void that they've felt in their life. There is no doubt that the modern concept of marriage leaves spouses who are often at odds with one another. Discussions can become disputes that lead to hours if not days of silent treatments and door slamming. Anger, resentment left unrelieved turn to a difficult to prevent pain that eats at the core of the couples union. Mutual respect drains and it becomes not just possible but also easy to hate someone you wanted to still love. Naturally the result often leads to divorce.

I never tried, I knew no better. I never understood that when a woman told me what was on her mind, she didn't want me to think of an instant solution (a guy reaction) for what was bothering her... She just wanted me to just listen and understand why things bothered her and what they meant to her. It has taught me that the emotions that so fill a woman’s soul, the things that define her femininity are the hardest things that she deals with, and sometimes she just needs a release. She needs a man to be a man.

Sometimes a woman needs a man to take matters in hand, guiding her and telling her that everything will be alright. That nothing is impossible, nothing is insurmountable when their souls merge, the tenderness and connection of aftercare... Nothing else can make a woman know a man will do whatever he has to do, to cherish and protect her and nothing less makes a man feel so much like a man.

Burns My Ass

2009-09-11T13:25:00.001-04:00

I'm perfectly willing to believe that there are a lot of conspiracies that go on in the world. Certainly a lot by governments and by industries and of course individuals who seek whatever they need or desire. Some of course say it was a gubment conspiracy, some perhaps figure 'dubya' did it. Perhaps some believe it all happened in a desert somewhere, the same place they filmed the fake moon landing.

But I don't care!

Almost 3,000 people died in a disaster eight years ago, innocent people. Not just Americans but people from something like 11 different nations. Yet there are people who for one reason or another refuse to recognize the significance of that event.

I remember where I was and what I was doing. Having earned a pilots license long ago I found myself answering numerous questions by others who were confused, not that I wasn't.

So, what burns my ass about all of this?

Where's Google?

Google will make all sorts of special pages to remember, celebrate of bring significance to all sorts of events. They make note of obscure authors, poets, artists, holidays like St. Patty's Day with drunken leperchauns... and just about anything you can imagine.

But not today and not last year either that I recall.

Why?

“There, now you’ll be able to enjoy your sore bottom on a nice hard seat for a while”

2009-09-09T06:00:00.007-04:00

Being the typical non-typical DD couple things can get interesting around here sometimes. Of course we have the same problem that a lot of couples have, an almost perpetual lack of privacy. We might have changed that slightly, time will tell…

Today was the first day of a new schedule where I think I’ve managed to get things coordinated so that we actually have at least an hour and perhaps as much as two hours or privacy per day.

Well, we did have some privacy over the weekend and it did give me the chance to give Minx a pretty good spanking. She has needed a spanking for a while. Not so much for anything other than stress relief and just to reinforcing discipline a bit, she has been very good.

Minx also had the chance to try to spank me, but that didn’t go too well being the wimp that I am. I chickened out part way into it and got away from her which of course pissed her off a bit. It’s not easy for Minx to spank me; it’s just not her thing. Minx is much more comfortable being the spankee but she does try to cater to my cravings on occasion and if the need should happen to arrive, she has no problem at all giving me a punishment spanking. However, when I need a stress relief spanking, it’s not at all easy for her. There’s that role reversal thing, but also I’m much harder to hold in position when I start squirming and kicking as happened over the weekend.

Well, today our private time came to fruition and I had every intention to rebuild Minx’s leather butt. Since it’s been a while since she’s had regular spankings the spanking she got over the weekend was difficult for her re-virigned bottom. Being the caring HOH that I am, I planned on putting some regularity back into her spankings so it would be easier for her to take a good long spanking. You spankos out there know what I mean, if it’s been a while, it takes a while before you build up ‘leather butt’ tolerance again. Well, that was not to be.

I walked into the house and asked her if she was ready to get her leather butt rebuilt… however she said, “No, it’s your turn”.

Well, I hadn’t been too cooperative when she tried to spank me over the weekend so I suppose I knew it was coming so of course I complied. Minx told me to go pick out some implements…. Don’t you hate that?

I opened the toy drawer and looked, I knew that I would not be able to get away with a wimpy selection so I didn't try. I picked out the wicked hairbrush paddle, the sawed off bamboo bath brush, the Reb's OTK paddle with holes and the The London Tanners Domestic Discipline Strap. Minx approved, I knew I didn’t have much of a choice but to pick the ones that I hate since I hadn’t been cooperative for the last spanking.

Minx gave the quick simple order… “Drop ‘em”. I did.

There’s something that’s both intimidating and exciting about standing there with your pants at your ankle while your lady is picking up a paddle. Naturally, Mr. Happy was doing his best to embarrass me standing at full attention which of course Minx made some comments along the lines of ‘looks like he wants a spanking too’ and made some light contact.

When I first climbed over her knee, Mr. Happy was making things a little uncomfortable before he was properly positioned. Minx started with her bare hand, which felt, very comfortable and relaxing. Of course her bare hand didn’t last long enough, the sting had been light and actually somewhat comforting. Mr, Happy didn't stay around to find out though.

When I’m on the receiving end once the spanking starts I usually can’t tell what I’m being spanked with unless she tells me. She did a very good job of keeping me just slightly beyond the edge of what I can tolerate. You know, any lighter and you can take it, but just hard enough to keep you from ignoring it while you squirm and stress and have to work at staying in place. Then of course it had to happen, time to pay for not cooperating for the last spanking. Those hard heavy spanks that make you dig your fingernails into your palms and stress to stay in place.

I believe that the next round was from the Rebs OTK paddle and she kept me right on the edge with it. Then a few rounds with the DD strap and and paddles again. It was really getting hard to stay in place but I didn't want any more hard heavy full swing ones.

In between rounds of implements Minx rubs and comforts for a few seconds (always too few) which of course is wonderful. Then after a particularly hard to take round with what I think was the Bamboo Bath Brush she was rubbing my bottom and next I felt her spread my cheeks. I felt something slide into my ass and I realized what she was doing, Minx was giving me a Fleet enema.

“There, now you’ll be able to enjoy your sore bottom on a nice hard seat for a while”

She said it with a little bit of a happy accomplished tone. That wasn’t the end of it of course, but it was the end of the unbearable pain from that point on as I had another thing to keep my mind occupied. The combination of the spanking that so far I had endured along with that bit of anal stimulation and caress just made the sting disapear and all of me was enjoying the continued contact.

Minx continued to spank and she spanked hard but from that point on ,I just wanted more. She asked me a couple of times if I had to go yet, I could have but I didn't want to, I wanted to feel more and put off going to expell as long as I could.

Odd isn't it.

Now, I’m probably more relaxed than I’ve been in a while, maybe tomorrow will be her turn.

The Spanking Party - Party

2009-08-13T12:30:00.000-04:00

Pammie on her blog made an interesting analysis of the political ramifications of spankos in the United States crossing the political spectrum.

She envisioned that with Blue State spankos, the spanker wears leather pants and a studded tool belts while the spankees wear revealing corsets and thongs or no panties. When talking about red state spankos she sees tight collars and wash pants (I don’t know what wash pants are) and the red state spankee in white cotton panties (or not) and big cotton dresses. Pammie wrote “But they both enjoy it...really... although secretly.”

Well, I hate tight collars and as a genuine card-carrying member of the vast right wing conspiracy I'm wondering if I should feel offended by the suggestion that I pretend to not enjoy spanking.

I do thoroughly enjoy spanking from both sides of the paddle and it has no bearing on my libertarian leanings. Minx is by many measures a bleeding heart liberal and almost always pulls the wrong lever in the voting booth.

Perhaps that makes us some sort of hybrid spanko couple.

Wait a minute, I must admit I don’t really enjoy spanking when it’s time for my butt to be pointed in the air. That’s usually when my mind races to “What the hell was I thinking when I thought I enjoyed spanking!” I should also admit that just maybe we enjoy it secretly since we tend to avoid discussing it with neighbors or people we meet at the convenience store...

Oh well.

However, It has been apparent for quite some time that our two party political system in the United States leaves a lot to be desired.

Perhaps it’s time for a strong third party…

A party of spankos!

I can see it now, we would call our national convention...

“The Spanking Party-Party”.

Hell, according to the quoted research by the respected scientists at Manswers 41% of the population would show up and vote with us. With undecided voters and independent crossover (switches) and conquest votes we would easily take over the White House, Senate and House in short order.

Imagine that, a Spanking Party in the White House. The possibilities are certainly thought provoking. Perhpas the party would have seperate splinter fringe elements... The Belts, The Leathers, The Woods and The Canes.

I suppose in some respect this is all too confusing and can't be solved in the blog world alone, yet certainly deserves more study. Perhaps a federal grant to fund some research would be in order. I’m calling my Senators… we need this in the Health Bill.

Spankos at Manswers?

2009-08-10T11:35:00.010-04:00

Dante has this video on his blog today. I couldn't get it to play without the background music so here's a copy:

Does Spanking Lead to Horniness? | SpikeTV | SPIKE.com

Of particular note is the percentage of spankos in America. Wow, double the rest of the world at 41%. Apparently the other 59% of Americans don't have sex. Still 41% is a good chunk of the population IMHO. Maybe it's because we grew up not only watching The Lucy Show but also we all have the DVD of the Duke dealing with Maureen O'Hara's attitude.

This isn't the first spanking "answer" at Mansers, here's another one just in case you need some help working on an addiction.

Wicked Videos, Latest Virals | | SPIKE.com

What a Weekend

2009-08-03T21:48:00.011-04:00

Minx and I have known each other for about 3 years and have been together for more than a year now, in fact over 1 1/2 years if you count those things with vigor. For anyone who doesn't know... we've been more than just an item. Minx and I have been through some tough times together, tough times certainly test the temper of a relationship and ours has remained steadfast and perhaps only stronger.

Somehow, we still are in love.

No, not just the I'm a spanko and I found a like minded spanko so we'll give it a go kind of love... But, real love. Don't ask me why but on many levels it just plain looks like we were made for one another. It's just plain a good fit. Well, if you don't know it's a bit of an age mismatch, I'm a few years older than Minx. Well, maybe a bit more than a few... let's just say that since boys tend to mature slower than girls do, we found the intersection on that particular graph and we'll leave it at that.

This past weekend we found it necessary to make a several hundred mile jaunt to see relatives. There had been a death in the family and it's one of those times when relatives can't be avoided. Now for the uninitiated, let me tell you relatives can be the true litmus test of a relationship.

Don't get me wrong, I do not only appreciate Minx's relatives, I think I actually love them as much as that is possible. In fact it's not that they don't really seem to care that Moi... This dirty old man who spanks their daughter's ass red raw has entered their sweet little girl's life but they actually appear (at times) to be grateful. Sure, I've tainted her and soiled her otherwise pure heart and taken her to the far reaches of sexual extremes... Well, actually maybe she's done that to me. Yet, they still tolerate my being. Well, at least none of them attempted to murder me in my sleep, yet.

I'm a dog guy, always have been... always will be. I dunno, there's just something about dogs. We just connect, I understand dogs... their baser wants and needs. They at times only care about the man that will vigorously rub their breast bones (the same sensation they feel when they are humping) and rub behind their ears. It's kind of dog equivalent of being a man who can find a woman's 'g' spot. Well, in any event... usually after five minutes any dog I encounter becomes my life long friend... Except Minx's dog but that's only because he thinks he's a cat.

Couple of years ago I dated a lady who had a health guide dog. Whenever she was close to going into a pain seizure the dog would sense it and move or position her to a spot where she could be safe until the seizure was over. The dog was a VERY large German Shepherd and was VERY capable of protecting her... Well, not all the time. After first meeting them for a few minutes and saying hello to 'protection dog' I proceeded to spank her bottom raw and 'protection dog' didn't really seem to give a shit except for the fact that while I was spanking her, I wasn't paying attention to him. But I digress.

Being a dog guy somehow equates to being an 'a-oh-kay' guy as far as Minx's mother is concerned and that is the point that I've been trying to get at through this whole typing session.

When the weekend began we were outside and a (nosey) neighbor came by... I was introduced by Minx's mom as Minx's boyfriend. Before the weekend was halfway over my status changed, I became her 'son-in-law'. I liked it very much. By default Minx's mom declared me as being Minx's husband and that's a good thing. I'm sure it's only because I was well liked by the three dogs that were running around. Yeah, they're dog people.

(ex) Virgin Bottom and Birthday Boy

2009-07-30T12:08:00.011-04:00

Things have been getting really tough lately and there hasn't been a lot of spanking around here and now is probably when we need it most. One of the few times that we've had some privacy, I was sick. Minx hasn't even been doing much reading of blogs let alone writing them and our stress levels have been hitting the roof.

I've been laid off for about four months now and unemployment compensation just doesn't cut it. We did have hopes of attending the fall SCONY get together since it's very close drive to us, however that certainly won't be happening. Neither Minx nor I have every been to a group gathering before and we were really looking forward to it. Imagine not having to be concerned with privacy!

Making matters worse Minx lost here job and lets just say that we are eating a lot more rice and ramen noodles. We haven't been able to pay the rent and apparently the landlord does not have enough of a sense of humor. Now we will be spending our last dollars to go see some relatives, short story... there has been a death in the family.

Finally the other night we did manage to get a spanking in, Minx was complaining that her buns of steel have atrophied and her bottom was virtually virgin. Not any more it's not, I gave some serious attention to her bottom that she still felt the next day.

Hopefully we can get some more spanking in. We've found that spanking for stress relief really does work, at least for a little while. Doesn't make the stress go away but it makes you forget about it for a while at least.

So, hopefully there will be some more spanking in our near future. Probably me soon too, just had a birthday (yeah, I'm a Leo) and there has been the threat of a birthday spanking for me that has yet to come to fruition.

I never heard of a birthday spanking until I got into TTWD. I dunno, guess all the people I hung around with either didn't ever do it or kept it to themselves. Now some questions, maybe someone knows...

Just what is appropriate for a birthday spanking?
Shouldn't it be a spank for every year?
Shouldn't it be sort of a ceremonious light smack sort of thing over clothes?

I would have thought that a quick light spank for every year but apparently I'm wrong. Minx who claims to know these things says that I'll have to be harshly bare bottom paddled, a solid minute for every year.

Gulp!

Well, in my case that's too damn close to an hour!

Shut Up and Spank

2009-06-06T11:26:00.005-04:00

I was just reading a post at Finding Sara about the issue of Consensual Non-consent. It’s one of those things that apparently many of us who practice a form of DD have decided on. Basically, the short version for us, is Minx has consented to be spanked whenever and however I feel she deserves it, and she can not refuse the spanking. With where we are now it’s a two way street. I too will accept a spanking from Minx if she feels I need it and here is the tricky part, there is no safe word. Sara did a very good job of describing the circumstances so I won’t rehash it in detail but there have been times when we’ve had to put DD on hold while we decided if this is really what we wanted. Just yesterday it looked like one of those times was upon us.

It wasn't during a punishment spanking since Minx has been very good lately. It was just your every day run of the mill kind of a combination stress relief and reinforce discipline spanking. The spanking wasn't very hard but it was rather long as that sometimes helps Minx get to a release, maybe a little bit of DD’ish subspace. I was sitting in a folding chair and Minx's was OTK and all the way down with her butt presented perfectly... If it had been punishment with faster and harder strokes the position would have certainly have left an "impression"... but it wasn't. Suddenly she yelled out "Stop torturing me!"

It's been awhile, so my first reaction was that we must be at one of those consent quandaries. Well of course I stopped right away, stood her up and we talked... It seems what was bothering her wasn't the paddle, but my questions! She wanted me to just shut the hell up and spank.

First time THAT has happened

The Other Side of The Paddle

2009-05-24T18:13:00.005-04:00

Minx at times, (perhaps not often enough) decides that she is going to try and satisfy my curiosity for submission.

Well, today was such a day.
Minx and I went out and partied a bit, and well... I've been trying to send signals that it's her turn to try and teach me what it might be like to be a submissive.

Damn that girl, she got the hint.

We came home from having a few brewskis at the club, and suddenly found ourselves with that ever so rare commodity.. Privacy.

I made some sort of offhand remark to suggest we play...
She responded with a certain... " Not me honey, you better stack the pillows on the bed so your ass can be up high..."

Well, mostly Dom that I am... Not today.
I promptly went to the bedroom and piled the pillows up high, got in position and waited. Damn theat girl didn't forget her comment and came into the bedroom.

Even worse...
She grabbed the canes. :(

It's a very strange dynamic we have, don't try this at home, your mileage will vary.

Minx has known, that her last punishment spankings have worn on me severely....
I've been concerned that I was too harsh and that I've put her through more than she could or should endure.

Well, belay that.
I told Minx that I wanted to know what I put her through... What it was like, stupid me...
She was all too willing to oblige.

My poor unsuspecting ass was propped high on a stack of pillows... "Oh, well, no matter what she has in mind it can't be too bad"

WRONG

She asked and stupid me told her that I wanted to know what it was like... the last MAJOR punishment that I gave her.

Well, let me just say that while you're getting 20 canes strokes, 10 with the thuddy and 10 with the thin stingy over a stack of pillows it's not very painful when you know that you feel10 of each again in the diaper position.

Yup, she did it.
Yup, it hurt like holy hell.
Yup, I enjoyed the comfort of her aftercare like I could not have imagined.... I hope it's always that way for her.

Damn, we have to BURN those canes.

Oh, the silly girl thinks she's going to give me a dose of the powertoys later on my already sore ass....

WRONG !!!
(I hope)

Punish a Spanko With a Spanking

2009-05-23T10:05:00.004-04:00

Often people post on message boards that they are in a TIH or DD relationship and they wonder that if they are going to be true to the concept... How can a spanking be a punishment for a spanko?

Sometimes people look for alternative punishments that don’t involve spanking. There have only been a couple of non-spanking punishments that I have given Minx. One involved no CDs for her far too long ride to work, no TV and early bed-time. Well, that’s fine too if it works but there isn’t any reason why a spanking can’t be a punishment for someone who loves spankings. Even for a woman who finds spanking erotic (Minx), a punishment spanking takes on an entirely new dimension and is not anticipated with pleasure so yes, it can be viewed as potentially truly effective punishment.

Waiting for an earned punishment spanking and the knowledge that the earned spanking will be with evil implements instead of 'yummy' ones will completely change the entire dynamic. For some, sometimes corner time before a spanking might be the method but actually there is no reason why it can't be "tomorrow night" or whenever the HOH decides. Waiting also of course helps insure the punishment will not given while still angry.

Everyone does (or should) have in their collection several implements that garner the response "what was I thinking when I bought that thing". You know, the implements that she threatens to at least hide if not burn. We have our power toys and of course our cane-iac products. Our power toys can be used all the time but when they are used with "umph", proper position or long duration they become totally wicked and certainly scary.

Intensity, a truly painful spanking that will leave her "remembering" it for days every time she walks or sits, once experienced won’t be craved. This is a bit tricky because a spanking that leaves a memory for a few days can be yummy and exciting every time it’s felt. However, if the memory was of a truly unpleasant spanking the dynamic changes.

Multiple spankings can be a strong deterrent. Knowing that tomorrow morning's spanking will on a bottom that will be on a still, far too sore bottom takes away any craving value.

Aftercare should never be ignored and being able to say "It’s all over" should be the words she always hears at "first hug". However "every thing’s forgiven" the most powerful words in any kind of relationship should only be after the last spanking if multiples are assigned. Not hearing those keywords can avert any belief that the spanking was pleasant and forestall the "I think I’ll brat because I want another one of those spankings" mindset.

Position matters. OTK spankings can often be pleasant for some no matter if they are mild or severe so using different positions can help send a message. Over a chair, sofa or stack of pillows where there is no touching between spanker and spankee can add heighten awareness to the physical pain because the emotional comfort of contact is not there. Ankle grab or diaper position can insure that not only is the contact just by implement, but also that the sensations are instilled deeper and more "lasting".

Being able to spank long enough and hard enough beyond the point of what could ever be viewed as pleasant can be a difficult hurdle to cross for an HOH who really doesn’t enjoy seeing his love feel pain. Knowing that it’s what she not only really needs but also really wants are the emotional keys for an HOH to get to the level of being able to provide a truly painful and memorable spanking. Be steadfast yet be prepared to hear, "can't we not do that?" and maybe even attempts to be bribed out of it. The only response to those things is a question: "Would you be able to repsect me if I changed my mind?"

Yet Another Memorable Spanking

2009-05-13T11:40:00.009-04:00

Our BDSM Side:
Fortunately, we do not qualify as a “vanilla” couple on several levels. It may confuse some but from a BDSM or D/s aspect I can be considered a “switch”. I have, and will happily again climb over her knee for a dreaded yet exciting taste of my own medicine. If she came home today and decided to put on heels and the garter belt, heaven only knows what sort of play might follow. In spite of my kinky curiosity as to what it would be like to be submissive I am without a doubt more Dom than sub, yet suppress that as much as possible so that she won't hesitate to reach for the heels and cuffs. The possibilities are much more exciting than Topping from the bottom, or is it bottoming from the Top or... being in the middle from the side... Oh it's all so confusing. Unfortunately D/s play doesn't happen enough for each of our liking as privacy is always an issue.

Our LDD Side:
Irregardless of our desire for there to be a mutual aspect of DD, there is no doubt that my role is HOH. Perhaps it's hard for some to understand but it's what Minx and I want and what we will someday have on a real full time level. Right now it's like the days before we were together as a couple, so infrequent that it's like having a long distance spanker/spankee relationship trying to keep up with any issues that have come up since the last time we were able to get together. The result is occasions DO present themselves for true punishment spankings certainly much more frequently than they would if we were able to devote 100% to our chosen lifestyle. If privacy weren't such an issue and discipline and maintenance spankings were more frequent I'm sure punishment spankings would be few and far between. Someday I'm sure, hopefully sooner than later maintenance and proper discipline can be more frequent and more consistent.

The Latest:
Minx hasn't written much about it, I don't think she likes to remember it right now since the “memory” has only now finally faded but she managed to earn the most painful punishment that I've ever had to give her. She has never had very many rules however the standing guideline is that I will hold her responsible for matters of Attitude, Respect and Responsibility. It was obvious that she had been disrespectful to me in multiple ways but even worse the things she said were very hurtful and could easily endanger our relationship. I was very angry about what she did and she knew it. It was difficult deciding what her punishment would be, it had to be very severe... I knew it and she knew it too. It was two days before I finally punished her, there is no way I could have punished her right away even if the opportunity (privacy) had presented itself, I was just too angry. I decided that her punishment was going to be the most severe she's ever had.

Minx hates the cane. The cane has absolutly no “yummy” aspect for her, at this time she just clearly fears the cane. Naturally, that leaves it as a required implement for any needed punishment. (photo and product from Cane-Iac) Up till now the times I've used the cane on Minx's bottom the strokes have been pretty mild in the sense that our canes are not full length and I've not used a full stroke. She has been marked with mild light welts but the welts have usually faded pretty quick. Not this time.

I decided that Minx's punishment would be three sessions. The first would be a severe caning, 20 with the thin cane and 20 with the thick cane. For the first 20 (10 with each) I had her climb on a stack of pillows, this time I didn't hold back with the strokes and in spite of the relatively short 26” length the canes landing on her bottom immediately brought tears. This was far more severe than she's ever experienced before, but we only half way there. This is about as far as she was able to write about on her blog.

I knew that she had to remember this punishment for a long time, I didn't want to continue but I knew that I had to and I was not going to reverse my decision, she was getting the last 20 and they would be even more painful in the diaper position.

I knew, (Minx knew too) that the last 20 in the diaper position would set the pain deep into her muscles and it would stay and be unrelenting for days. When I was done Minx has a butt full of nasty raised welts and it hurt me to know that for as scorched as her bottom looked on the outside the pain was well set in and she would certainly be feeling it for days. Well not really, what was coming the following evening would be far more memorable.

We've joked back and forth a few times about Minx having “Bunns of Steel”. She seldom marks and the pain from even a punishment spanking rarely lingers for more than at most a day. That was now changing.

We've both watched numerous videos on spankingtube.com and laughed and wondered if anyone ever actually spanks really hard or really long or maybe it's just us. Minx's mildest spankings are far more severe when compared to those on the videos we've seen. There are a couple of professionals like Danna Specht who appear to put some real heart (and heat) into it, but by and large most of the spankings just look wimpy.

When Minx climbed over my lap I don't think she knew just how severe she was going to be paddled. What I've done in the past while paddling her is interjected some real give it my all “full force” swings for “GET BACK IN PLACE” value and such. This time almost ever single swing was full force and she literally had the “You won't sit comfortable for a week!” spanking. When it was all over I gave her the option of taking the second severe spanking right away, another one just like she just had. She wanted me to decide so I told her I wanted her to to be spanked again now and get it over with. She agreed and back over my knee she went for some more full force from the bathbrush, the stinger and the hairbrush paddle.

Actually I was shaken by the severity of the spanking I gave her, it wasn't easy to do and I hope I never have to spank her so hard and so long again. I love her so much.

Alas, hardly a week later and Minx has earned another. No, it doesn't have to be the same severity, but it will be once again... memorable.

Cane Pain v2.0

2009-04-03T05:53:00.005-04:00

I think that since the cane is extreme, it's also very fast with it's result. Expeditious yes, in that it takes a yet to be punished bottom and goes from zero to major ouch quite quickly, it left her still needing more. So, More cane pain for Minx came last night. She thought it was needed too, so rattan met already tender bottom again with a promise of a paddling this morning. The only time we can get a spanking in, is very early morning when all the urchins are asleep. Since she has to leave so early it makes it virtually impossible for complete aftercare so it's not a prefered method. She thought about not waking me up, but she knew she needed it.

There's also no doubt that when a paddle lands on an already tender bottom the intensity is multiplied. Minx's reaction was strong even when I first started with just my bare hand now that I think about it. Usually Minx can take quite a bit of spanking of ever increasing intensity, before her legs start kicking but this morning her legs were running the three minute mile almost from the first swat.

All is now forgiven and never needs to be talked about again, I believe things are again all well, she is my Good Girl.

Cane Pain

2009-04-01T06:17:00.008-04:00

Our biggest frustration is that we too rarely have any alone time. It wears on both of us far too much and unfortunately we aren’t in a financial position to do very much about it at this time. It becomes stressful to say the least and yesterday which was Minx’s day off threw some gasoline on the fire.

The day started off about the same as any other day, which is normally the way we like to see things. Unfortunately after running a few errands together I decided to meet my son’s pleas and spent about an hour helping him with his car. Combined with the time I spent trying to get the mower running (First Rite of Spring). Well, I think it left Minx in a bit of a mood probably feeling that on her day off, I should have been spending time with her. Mind you, I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately and Minx has been spending three weeks or so trying to get me to relax a bit. Well, yesterday afternoon she did her brattiest to reverse her previous efforts.

The small block Chrysler is one of the better engines that has ever come out of Detroit. Although a large part of my youth was spent playing with small block Chevy’s I can admire the sound of the Mopar (Chrysler) small block since the siamesed exhaust ports make it sound very much like the small block Chevy, a sound I truly enjoy. However, when I’m in the right lane doing a respectable 55 plus a little and I hear a roaring small block Mopar under heavy throttle... and it happens to be Minx’s vehicle passing me at an ever increasing speed… Well, I don’t find THAT enjoyable.

The cane can be a fascinating implement, albeit a bit difficult to master and most assuredly that more difficult to endure. Because of our privacy issues the cane has become a more often used implement, which Minx hates with a passion possibly even more than the Eco-Friendly bath brush mentioned in a previous post. To date probably the most intense cane experience were some "railroad tracks" that lasted maybe about a day. That has been surpassed, today Minx has her first real cane welt and it will likely be with her for a while.

One was enough for now, I won’t go into the rest of the details of why I punished her, but she is also forbidden to have her CDs for her (far too long) ride to work and was sent to bed early with no TV and no computer for this morning (which she forgot about). The challenges continue and evolve but never diminish my love for her, somehow it just gets stronger.

Story Board

2009-03-26T22:56:00.004-04:00

Well I've been wondering what to do with my Story Blog and I've decide to bring many of the stoires over to the blog. Yeah, it's a PITA to read them since sometimes they appear in reverse order but that is the writing style anyway :).

So...
Look back by date and you will see a number of my (Story) writings re-appear on this blog.
Most are pre 12/07 so look down and back a few pages, you might like them :)

BD

Back Active and Rambling Off Topic

2009-03-26T09:44:00.011-04:00

It's been a while since I've posted so much, or for that matter paid any real attention to this blog at all. Yesterday I "woke up" my "Story Blog", changed the blog template and changed over to a Blog Roll instead of links. I think I like it a lot now being that it is sorted by most recent update.

Yeah I know I could use iGoogle or one of those many desktop home pages or Readers... but for an ol' DOS guy like myself I just can't get into those things. Probably some subconscious thing that reminds me of Sidekick.

Image from http://www.vintage-computer.com/

You see back in the DOS 2.x or 3.x days you had to do everything you could to preserve every last bit of available memory you could. If things like files=20, buffers=20 stir a memory you know what I mean. Sidekick was this nifty program that gave you all sorts of desktop gadgets that were really neat but they were TSRs (Terminate and Stay Residents) in other words once they took a chunk of your precious memory they would not completely unload without rebooting the PC, which also made them PITAs and we all know what they are.

Well with these desktop thingys I start thinking about cookies and tracking cookies and the like and well damn it I like browsing with a bit of privacy but I suppose that's something of a moving target. I dunno, I wonder if I add say a nifty free Joke of The Day... will I be the 1 billionth person to do so and now a bunch of people sitting in a boardroom somewhere decide "That's it People, it's time to take JOTD public, were announcing an IPO". In other words what if I'm the guy that incites the next "Tech Bubble" and another blow to the economy.

So, I look at my resistance to using all those desktop thingy's as being a sacrifice to help protect and preserve what's left of the economy if not mankind itself, as we know it today.

Wicked Stingy

2009-03-25T19:05:00.003-04:00

After several previous attempts to build up to it, last night for the first time Minx felt some "heartier" strikes from the cane. Ours came from Cane-i-Ac and is their OTK style. I was very proud of her, she was quivering with every stroke and yet managed to hold still. She was my very good girl. I gave her about 9 strokes over her clothes and then removed her panties. I gave a nice series and then asked her if she was ready to accept an intense one.... She responded that it was up to me... I responded that she should ask for what she needed, sh did. I was so very proud of her, the gift of her submission was extrodinary.

We then proceeded to a more traditional rather extended OTK spanking, we haven't had much opportunity lately with one exception of the Stress Relief that Minx gave me over the weekend.

Aftercare can not be over rated by the way.

Stress Relief

2009-03-25T18:56:00.002-04:00

Well I've joined the ranks of the unemployed (again).

I spent most of last week mopeing around in a fog, with all the things going through my head that pre-occupy too many of our brains today... How will we make ends meet? How will ever get ahead? When will they decide to repo the vehicle? How can survive?

So Stress in bucket loads...

Minx had enough of it by Saturday and yup you guessed it...

I got a spanking, a BIG spanking. Damn I should never have tought that girl how to hold the paddle.

Well I think it worked, cleared the head a bit.

Life will go on and somehow we will prevail.

Memorable Spanking

2009-03-02T05:59:00.004-05:00

One thing that has become too obvious lately is that I've not been able to spank Minx the way she needs to be spanked. There are lots of reasons but the most common reason is the lack of privacy and with work schedules how seldom we see one another.

However, what has happened over recent months is her spanking sessions have gotten harsh with more intense implements, but too quick.

In retrospect it's obvious that I've been having a hard time spanking Minx effectively. Somehow I love her more every day and that makes it harder to truly spank painfully for an extended period. The point being, that is exactly opposite of what she needs.

She hasn't been getting corner time intermissions just OTK or pillows till done. She hasn't been getting the A.A.A.C. (Avoid At All Costs) Spanking when she deserves it. Well, that changed, she told me and she got the good spanking she needed. There was corner time and prolonged sessions with some of our more "memory making" implements and she was sore for several days.

I truely have to work on knowing that she needs more.

Reminder spanking would have been good this weekend but it just wasn't in the cards.

Mutual DD, Tough Times, Tempers, Plastic Strops and Sore Cheeks

2008-12-14T22:18:00.004-05:00

If you are talking about Doms and subs, well they might not fully understand the sort of peculiar relationship that exists when you are both Dom and sub. How can it be? Well, just be in love with someone who you’ve decided to not only be held accountable to… but also some who you’ve agreed to hold accountable.

Yes folks, a mutual domestic discipline relationship is very unique, and I’ve found it to be very special.

Me?
Well, I know better. However call it a scream for attention… Call it just plain stupid… This past week I did the unforgiveable. I drove drunk. As ususal, I made it home without problem Being able to drive in such a condition is not a blessing but a curse, that ultimately allows one to believe that they can always do it without problems… an impossible thing to do forever.

I talked to Minx from the bar, she guessed I was probably there. What she didn’t know was that I was knocking back shots with my beers… all of course on an empty stomach as I had not eaten all day. She had no idea just how wasted I was till I got home and was literally falling down. I text messaged her, (no excuse) that I was being naughty. I expected her to come get me. She did not... for one very good reason, her phone (and we verified this) never got the sent messages.

That’s been the way it’s been for us lately, we’ve had very odd and some very tough times some we've caused ourselves but most we've just been stuck in the middle of. In a nutshell... We are expecting to be evicted any day… or powerless,… or phoneless… or heatless… as we continue to dance around the bills that we can barely sometimes pay. Stress is high... no unbearable for both of us, and neither of us could deal with all of this without the other... tempers run on sharp edges… and we often need to grab each other by the earlobe and drag each other for a well deserved spanking but can’t even do that because we never seem to have privacy.

Well, come to the rescue… a friend. One special lady who knows our situation (who I used to mentor) let us use her house for a few hours today. Minx took full advantage and my poor ass is burning.

Thanks again to that special lady who managed to leave on her dresser (for Minx’s use) the wicked plastic prison strap. For those that may want to know… It works all too well.

The Notorious Bettie Page

2008-12-12T06:54:00.006-05:00

I was just reading about Bettie Page. It's hard to imagine what life would have been like for such a free spirit in the 50's. Not only was she a "Pin-Up" girl, but she was also featured in many BDSM photos.

Apparently she just passed away at the age of 85.

Kind of makes you wonder what your Grandmother might have been doing back in the day doesn't it?

Power Tools

2008-11-23T11:04:00.010-05:00

Its' hard to imagine why we have such a fascination with implements (and of course such large collections).

Pictured here are the latest popular "power tools" that seem to get the most use within our household.
.
The top paddle is "ol' faithful" which has a long history of getting strong reactions. Measuring about 10 inches or so and of very sound 3/4" thick oak it has a long established history of having earned considerable respect. In spite of looking like a wennie paddle there it absolutely no doubt that it can easily rank about a 8.9 (or more) on the "Oh Sh**" Meter.

The second one down is the OTK paddle with holes from Reb's (which unfortunately appears to have stopped selling their fine products). Being about 1/2" thick it's fairly light for it's size (except at the business end) and measures about 14" in overall length. When used with gusto it can also do about a minimum of 8.1 and perhpas a 9.7 or greater on the "OS" meter.

The third implement is the "Sawed Off" bath brush. Made by "Ecotools". This beauty packs about an 17.2 on the "OS" meter ( The OS meter runs from 1 to 10 by the way).

Bringing up the bottom (in more ways than one) is the raw form of the "Sawed Off". It's a beast and can score about a 25.7 on the above mentioned "OS" meter.

My darling Minx bought the two monster "eco friendly" bamboo bath brushes from Kmart I believe. Last weekend sweet Min had very valid reasons to question the wisdom of that purchase.

Last night, I too learned of the foolishness of that purchase. Then, as a fire built upon my posterior I too began to contemplate a bamboo bon-fire; as I was introduced to the edge of the envelope of the "OS" Meter.

Had to Happen

2008-11-16T16:22:00.001-05:00

Minx, the love of my life has not been feeling well for too long now. Well, part of it has been that she has been a bit under the weather, and part of it has been that she has known that she has earned a serious discipline session. One that even if she could get out of, never would consider doing.

It all started a week ago when there was the need for what should have been a quick simple spanking. Well, attitudes and timing were all wrong, the spanking did not go well and of course much of it was my fault as I do believe that it is the HOH's responsibility to make sure that the punishment is appropriate, timely and certain. However, her response to the needed spanking was somewhat disrespectful to say the least and we all know that has to be intollerable.

There were certain aspects of the spanking that Minx earned last week that were less than certain... However...She questioned the discipline... that can't happen. She resisted the discipline... again, that can't happen. However more seriously, she failed to properly submit and some of the things that happened actually would of, or could have... endangerd our relationship if one or both of us were less resiliant than we are.

The end result was that Minx just received what was perhaps the most severe, the most painful and the most long lasting spanking that she's ever had. It hurt me terribly to spank her so severly. I never want to have to giver her such a severe spanking again but I will NEVER hesitate to do so when it is the proper thing to do.

The Cure All

2008-10-28T23:20:00.004-04:00

I was just watching the show "Manswers" which is a chauvinistic show designed to answer the weird questions that are always in the back of mind of the average American male.

Well, to sum it all up, men are pigs, no great revelation here.

Some of the topics being covered were "What odors will turn woman on?"

and

"In what country is a man most likely to be satisfied orally?"

The answer by the way is Austria, something about the love of sausage I guess.

But I digress…

One of the brain teaser questions was: "What is the best way to beat an addiction?"

Well, guess what...

Not a 12 step plan…

Not methadone…

The best way to beat an addiction happens to be… "Getting Whipped" AKA: SPANKED!!!

So, how does one get an insurance company to cover those therapy sessions?

In any event…

What an incredible revelation.

Geessseee…

All along we’ve been on cutting edge of medical science and have never known it. However, in the pursuit of nothing less than establishing a standard that includes exploring the unknown for the betterment of mankind...

We will pursue the exploration to find the edge of the envelope.

We will continue to explore the cutting edge of science and be there for any new developments. Perhaps it's time for a Federal Grant to determine what is the most effective implement…

It’s about time we get some Federal Funding in the Spanko World.

Could Submission Help Foster Feminine?

2008-09-26T23:15:00.005-04:00

Privacy is such a rare thing for Minx and I right now. So, when we have it, we must use it even if the time may not be right emotion wise to address certain needs in a proper manner. However, we use what time we can in what ever way we can.

The other night Minx and I lay in bed and I rolled her over bottom up and gave her a warm bottom with hand and one of the light hairbrushes. It wasn't a spanking for a specific reason, nor was it very severe. Somehow I just thought it was needed. Her first reaction was "Do you feel better now?" referring to my obvious (biological response to having secured her submission for a spanking) pleasure while I spanked her. In response to her question I handed her the hairbrush rolled over and gave her the opportunity to have revenge which she too merrily indulged in.

When done I asked her "Do you feel better now?". She thought about it for a few seconds and completely ignored the fact that I gave her the opportunity to spank me and responded that it had been a while since she had a chance to feel submissive and feminine.

Tonight I came home and found Minx asleep on the sofa with the TV on... Butt in the air... Well you know what I did! Yeah, she jumped up and quickly sat up protecting her bottom from further immediate attention. Later I came over and gave her bottom more attention and remarked how we now had a Kodak moment candidate for the "Spanking Classics Red Butt of the Year" Award.

Actually, I believe she was again happy to have submitted for no other reason than to know that having submitted to my will that she be spanked made her feel more feminine.

What think yee?

Creative Juices

2008-09-18T00:15:00.002-04:00

Somehow I think Minx gets very nervous when my creative juices begin to flow.

Well, we needed something quieter for those special occaisions and I made a "homemade" Loopy Johny out of an old broom handle and a bungee cord.

Now you would think that Minx would be proud of me for having been very creative...

Not so.
She does not like it at all (especially when those creative juices land upon her cheeks).

She does not like the Loopy at all actually and gave me absolutely no serious "At-A-Boys" for having created it.

Yet, and here's the part that's NOT FAIR.... She had absolutley no reluctance to LIGHT MY ASS ON FIRE with the aforementioned Loopy Johnny durring a need for a quiet session upon my posterior a week or so ago.

This whole Spencer thing could get pretty ugly...

Damn, I need a new hobby.

Broken Cane

2008-09-06T23:57:00.009-04:00

I’m about to tell some things about Minx and I that neither her nor I have ever discussed or "blogged" about before in any sort of detail.

Anyone who has read our blogs knows how I won't hesitate to spank her poor bottom raw...
Well, she just might very well...
No, ah shit...
She WILL be returning the favor.

Now those of you who may have read some on the things here, or particularly on my Yahoo 360 know that I am not your typical eyeryday found on any street corner Dom-ish Disciplinarian. If you know anything about me you’ll know that my first sparks into non-vanilla-ism was based on some deep seeded need to be submissive. Butt, then there were complications.

Well, like an experienced subbie friend who when I told her that I thought I had some dom-ish tendencies told me that she could tell I was a natural Dom but she knew I had to find that out for myself. Although my whole approach to LDD has been keeping it as far from BDSM as possible there are of course those other times when minds drift to the D/S aspects for any sort of play.

Well all of this gets so complicated and confusing sometimes…

There are times when I know that the label of switch suites me best. In any event Minx has known this about me from the start, or actually before the start and one of the first things that came up when we became an item was that perhaps a "Spencer" thing might work really well for us (at her suggestion). No, not that she has ever had any Fem-Dom desires but she does have a basic desire to give me whatever I might want or need.

Uh… is that bottoming from the Top or subbing from the side…
well…
who knows…
It doesn’t really matter in the long run…

Butt…

I resisted.

In hindsight not because I didn’t know that she was probably right but because I’ve spent an hour or two Googling "Spencer Plan" and have come to the conclusion that there is little if any evidence of it being any more than an urban legend. Some sort of well organized hoax story… great idea that it may be.
My resistance with time has worn away by my inner desire at times to be on the wrong end of the paddle, and to find ways to be closer to her.
.
Fast forward to a week or three ago…

On one of those rare occasions I found myself face down into the bedcovers with my butt propped high… Minx sitting on my back to hold me down and spanking the living daylights out of my poor ass. Yeah, despite underlying curiosities and all I don’t submit very well. Now… here’s the thing. Minx got VERY wet and I got very excited (read hard) about the whole idea.

So…
I told Minx that I was wrong to brush off her long ago suggestion and told her that yes, it might just be the perfect thing for the two of us.

Well, that of course means that at some point I have to get the same sort of AAAC (Avoid At All Cost) spanking that she has become very familiar with. Hard as it may be she has done her best to give me that spanking (Apparently I need to be restrained for such a thing). On the couple of occasions that she has tried to get us going on that track… I’ve resisted and Dom-ed my way out of those spankings.

The really scary part for me is that she has learned (first-hand) from our toy collection what really, really hurts. Oh yeah, she knows how to use them all including the old broken cane. Perhaps she needs to scold me into submitting without restraint. She did get me over some pillows and managed to land about nine really memorable strokes with the old (broken 6" short) cane. It was that last stroke, she was more adept with each one… Stroke number nine was extrememly painful and left my ass with a sore sport that lasted for about five days.

The whole experience brought to mind one of Minx's better quotes: "What the hell was I thinking when I decided on this whole spanking thing… I need a new hobby." (Scarlet Minx, 2008)

One of the unique aspects is that the whole time I may be thinking that a spanking may be enroute to my ass... I still have to be there holding Minx accountable... the double edged paddle of a Spencer-ish relationship.

I know how hard it is for Minx to even try (in spite of our recent discovery about it’s ability to get her wet).
Uh-Oh, did I somehow uncover a closet FemDom? We do have very little free and private time together, however I know the sooner or later the inevitable will certainly arrive upon my poor cheeks.

Thank you God for the gift of letting me have this woman in my life… I love her so much!

Minx my sweetie...

I LOVE YOU!

Lots of Sting

2008-09-01T06:59:00.003-04:00

Well Minx has a very sore bottom and this series of spankings probably the most severe she has ever had from me.

She certainly deserved a good spanking but she crossed the line and misbehaved durring the spanking, she wrote about it on her blog so I won't repeat it here but lets just say her mouth got out of control when she saw the bath brush.

Minx hates sting, so I made sure she got plenty very intense sting. What she doesn't get very often but she did get this time was that deeper muscle soreness that stays after the sting is gone.

As time goes by I love Minx more and more every day. Being someone who has paddled a number of naughty bottoms over the past couple of years, you would think it would get easier for me. The thing of it is it's actually getting pretty hard to spank Minx. It's one thing to do a GG spanking but when she needs a really good spanking it gets harder to do every time.

No Free Time... No Privacy

2008-07-13T06:57:00.003-04:00

It's been quite a while since I've had the time to do much of anything in the way of browsing the net, let alone post any blogs. Work has been very demanding, yet provides woefully inadequate financial reward. It's been very difficult for both Minx and I lately and I don't think either one of us could survive without having the strength of the other to rely on.

In any event we're still here and counting on better tomorrows.

When You Don't Want a Spanking... You Really Need One

2008-07-01T23:07:00.003-04:00

Tonight I slapped Minx's behind a few times and she yelled that she didn't want a spanking... That's when I knew without a doubt that she really needs a very, very good spanking.

Sometimes not having privacy is just an inconvenience, sometimes I think in our case it's too often the norm and the most insideous thing that we have fighting our relationship. Both ways by the way. We have and we can practice to a degree mutual LDD... When and if we can actually practice it... Not quite a "Spencer Plan", but there are times when I do find the need to know that Minx has in the past... and hopefully will in the future hold me accountable for certain things... Much to her regret sometimes I think, because I don't believe she get's as much out of that weird aspect as I would hope that she would. Weird shit I know, but who of us could claim to be 100% normal.

BUTT...
I digress...
Minx, when you wake tomorrow and find that finally... after a very long time... I've posted to my blog the important thing for you to know is that you will be getting a very, very memorable spanking. Yeah, I know... When? Well... whenever we can have the needed privacy. Might be sooner than you would expect so you should sit comfortable while you can my sweet woman that I love so much.

Mea Culpa

2008-03-16T22:09:00.009-04:00

Kinda weird, yeah...

Well, Minx and I can't really always talk since there is the shift thing... So, dear reader... You are privy to see some first person communication between Minx and I !

We haven’t ironed out all of the specifics it will take quite some time I’m sure, but we do have a unique DD relationship since I happen to be a switch.

Sexuality can and does play into such relationships where it isn’t just one partner who could find themselves with a tender bottom. Yes, spanking in spite of the painful discipline aspect can be, and most certainly is an erotic experience. Giving control to someone you love is just one of those things… or having control taken by the one you love… same thing.

So, that means that Minx on many more than one occasion has managed to spank my bottom tender. No, she doesn’t have it down perfect yet, but she has gotten much, much more effective each time she has spanked me. If I have to crawl over her lap I do know for a fact that by the time it is over I will have a very hot sore bottom. In fact it’s gotten to the point where yes, sexually it is exciting to think that she can (and will) do it, but on the other hand it’s far some something that I would actually look forward too. Of course, she has had some of her best tutoring at me knee. She has learned how to spank very hard, very long and very effectively and we don’t really know what it is, perhaps a little bit of switch in her persona. Or, just the idea of being the wonderful submissive that she is, she is somehow getting into the roll and liking it as if I’m topping from the bottom. Butt, she is liking the idea of turning my bottom red and purple, perhaps a little too much.

Things have been a bit difficult for Minx and I for the past few weeks. I was sick, she had a business trip, privacy has been at a premium and this past week one of my sons broke a bone and needed surgery. So, it’s been hard to pay attention to one another and hard to have any time at all to ourselves.

Additionaly, it's not always easy for her to see how much she lights up my life when she walks in the room. You see, I've found my perfect love. How do I identify Minx as my perfect love? Two words, actually a name... Ronald Reagan. Yeah, I'm a Red State kind of guy and Ronny can in many ways be my hero. However it's the love of Nancy Reagan that I wish to speak about. Ronald Reagan was in the White House and his aide was at his side. Nancy came in to see him and they talked and kissed and she then left the room. Ronny watched her leave and then turned to his aide and said " She is the only person in the world who can make me feel lonely, just by leaving the room.". He was in love, really in love with Nancy. I always hoped I could find a woman like that. Praise te Lord and pass the amunition... that lady is Minx.

Well sorry to say, Minx it turns out has been pissed at me and getting more pissed by the day and the hour. Yeah, I’m a guy so at times I do bark a bit in spite of my best efforts to be patient and remain in control of my mood. Well, poor Minx, she hasn’t been taking it well. The result has been that she hasn’t felt that she could talk to me and she has thought that anytime I’m not happy and smiling it must be because I’m upset with her. Well that’s certainly not true. Still, I felt quite a bit guilty about it and of all things, she decided that I needed my bottom heated because of it. Ok, well… Yes Mam. I of course fell into super apologetic mode and became perfectly willing to jump over to my submissive side, because I must have caused this problem for this wonderful woman that I love so much.

Well, back to the scenario of not having the perfect time and privacy for each other. So, I told her that I would do something about it and make sure she could take care of things. We need more quiet implements. My once almost scary rattan cane broke to about a 20" stubby, perhaps a bit of a OTK cane but certainly not scary quiet welt maker. "Minx, we need some quiet devices. I’m going to make a Loopy Johnny so you can tear my poor guilty butt apart and turn it into red and purple Jell-O and me into a quivering mass of guilty remorse". Well I did say something like that, although perhaps I didn’t use those exact words but she got the idea and so do you.

So, I did it. I made a rather formidable loopy and quite frankly I have absolutely no desire to feel it’s bite on my poor bottom. I tried it on my thigh and it has no allure for my somewhat nervous ass. The handle has to be about 12 or 14" long and for the business end, I put the leftover from a bungee cord that unwillingly gave it’s life for this device. I did make sure that it would stay put, I taped the bungee to the end of the handle (which I notched for the cord) and then poured a bunch of super glue into the attachment to make sure that no matter how hard the little bugger ripped my quivering butt it could still survive and rip more butt. Oh, and then I found the remnants of an old fishing rod in the cellar and placed the two together on top of the dresser for her to use as best she saw fit. That effin fishing rod BTW is one wicked welt maker… We’re talking no sit for a week kind of thing.

So, all sorts of wicked tools are available at Minx’s hand for her to use on my poor doomed butt. What happened? Nothing. Yeah, and now I’ve decided that things have to go the other way… Minx is the one who needs to be spanked.

Here’s the thing. Maybe I was wrong, maybe I was too short with her. Maybe I was just too insensitive for her needs. Well, I went almost an entire day of doing the Mea Culpa thing… Then, well… If and when you are wrong and you are willing to accept responsibility and consequences for any possible wrongdoing…. That’s wonderful. However, your Mea Culpa needs to be accepted and eventually you need to be forgiven.

That did not happen.

Imagine me, trying to be submissive (as best I can) an almost sometimes Dom that I am, and asking for forgiveness… and not getting it. Uh, hello… how do you spell mistake and where was it made?

Ok, that went on for a while… times up.

Well Miss Minx…

You had the chance to forgive me as I would do in a heart beat for you… Butt, since you did not… Now, I think maybe, you were playing it for whatever it was worth. I think that maybe you were wondering concisely or not just what this role thing might do for you and I think that to a degree you were playing it for what it was worth and wondering. Nope, PMS is not an excuse. We needed to rest our heads on the pillow with things resolved, and that didn’t happen. Now, I’ve jumped back and I’m in HOH mode.

I’m just a little upset little lady.

Real or imagined, whatever has kept you from feeling open to me and not able to talk to me has done some damage and I will NOT let our relationship be damaged. Our relationship won’t be damaged by me and not by you… and certainly not by some sort of wall that I’m more than capable of, and willing to make endless efforts to tear down.

You, young lady will be getting a toasty warm bottom, you will not now or ever take advantage of my willingness to accept that maybe I did something wrong, then play it against us. Ok, maybe you did not, maybe you did but didn’t know it would have these consequences so maybe the sound spanking that you will be getting isn’t really fair in your mind. Well, it can’t always be fair and you do know that. However one way or another I will put an end to it, when it is done everyone and everything will be forgiven, period.

For one reason more than any other,

I love you sweetie...

Well, yeah back to the concept that you readers will know this as soon or sooner than Minx sees it. Yeah, who knows how she will read this. Butt, by the times she reads this the alarm will have gone off, she will have had a cup of coffee... So, before she leaves for work she will either come back into the bedroom and throw her cup of coffee on me, or... give me a hug and tell me she loves me too.

I'm betting on the latter.

Oh, BTW little lady, submission and maintenance spankings are back on as soon as, and whenever I see fit that they are needed, period.

Oh, Considering the season....
Mary Kate Danerher...
Do you go for it?

Belt and Hairbrush

2008-03-04T17:26:00.007-05:00

Time and again when reading spanking oriented blogs or posts on spanking forums I'm amazed by the significance and the power of the belt. Simple device that it may be, somehow it has some sort of mystical power over so many women, perhaps some sort of symbol of masculine power. It would seem that many women have such a strong reaction, the butterflies in the tummy, the tinlge that runs up the spine and all from just the sight of the belt being removed or even more powerfully the sound of the belt being pulled from the pant loops. The sound can clear a brain in turmoil and stop all other distractions and it commands complete attenion.

Perhaps it's the sense of immediatecy, things will be dealt with now, right now and there is no point in trying to talk your way out. "Young lady, talk is over. Your bottom is going to be getting real hot and red right now and that's all there is to it". Conversely, for men who are spanked the sight of a woman with a stern posture holding a hairbrush has a similar powerful visual impact.

(art found at spanked hubby)

Perhaps it's the anticipation, perhaps it's knowing that there is no escape and the activity that is about to play out on one's bottom is inevitable. Whatever the trigger, the power of these sights and sounds is far more powerful than the sting and burn.

What do you think about when you see and hear these symbols? Do they get your attention unlike anything else?

Flying Fans the Fanny

2008-03-02T09:19:00.005-05:00

Well, just got back from the airport. Up at 03:30 this AM to take Minx to the airport, she's off on a business trip this week. Flying off to warm weather, and of course she's flying with a warm bottom. Not the most comfortable ride on a airline seat... yeah, she'll be in that seat for most of the day.

We finally had the opportunity to deal with the speeding issue the day before yesterday. I'm sure she will be remembering it for a while. We did a GG spanking last night and I'm sure that I managed toapply some fresh heat to her still tender tushie. She mentioned that the fire ants were attacking her cheeks when she sits certain ways.

Bonnie from MBS linked to Minx's blog yesterday, so I'm sure she'll be getting a lot more visitors now. The number of visitors to this blog have gone way down since I checked the "adult content" box on the blogger settings page. Now when someone comes to this page they get the "are you sure you want ot see this stuff" page. Antoher draw back is that I can no longer see what site refered the visitor. I do like to link to site that link here but now I can't see them, this is a 'Blogger' page and I don't see the raw logs since it's not "my" site. Kind of a bummer, but after the wiki art site went down I don't want to give anyone a reason to take this blog down.

Poor Minx won't have a PC all week while she's away, some scum stole the RAM chip out of her laptop so it's out of commision until we can replace it. Unless we hit powerball that won't be for a few weeks yet.

Derailed

2008-02-28T15:28:00.011-05:00

When things appear to be progressing just so well, watch out. That's when life will slap you in the face with a cold dead fish and yells "Surprise!"

Minx and I have had a tough week or so, she fell and hurt her back and then I managed to come down with a wicked case of the flu or something. Really interesting... just when I started to get used to some of the symptoms... they would change or get worse.

The hardest part for Minx has to have been discovering how miserable and how much of a turtle I am whenever I'm sick, just leave me alone in my shell. I think it may have something to do with the way I hate self pity and how I especially hate it in myself, hence I just want to be left alone to bask in my misery. Well, I'm finally starting to feel like a human being again so hopefully I'm done with my sick time... for the year I hope. I'm certainly anxious to get back on track and I know Minx is too, soon I think but it can't be soon enough.

Minx wrote on her blog about the incident with the speeding that she knows she'll be getting a very memorble spanking for. It's one of those things that we've talked about before and now I have to be extra certain that we don't have to talk about it again. Often the worst part of knowing that a severe spanking is on the way, is the waiting and this time the wait has been extra long. It's also been a time when we can't be very close in the touchy feely way. The hugs have been weak because of sore backs and the kisses have been missing to avoid sharing germs.

Minx has been a very good girl through all of this and I'm sure that she would like to ask me if she can get a good girl spanking instead of the punishment spanking. Well, yes dear. You have certainly earned a special good girl spanking... too.

Buns of Steel?

2008-02-14T21:42:00.001-05:00

I would rather be curled up in the blankets right now but I have been ordered to write this post. I am so exhausted, cold, and feel very contrite.

I knew I had blown it again…how many times now...have we talked about this rule of five cups of coffee a day? No More!

I can’t remember to be honest but I will remember tonight!

I already knew I blew it, I already knew I disappointed him again.

In knowing that made me feel somewhat bad, but I really had no idea just how bad until I turned around from standing in the corner and saw the mound of pillows and then I truly knew just how much I had disappointed him.

I just knew that the belt was coming off and was going to meeting my bottom with a searing heat. And that it did!

Each and every lash took my breath away. I was made to count the last six and that was very hard too do.

Then came the paddle...I can’t believe how bad that hurt. I knew in my heart I deserved what I was getting. I tried my hardest to stay put and not cover my bottom.

I must be honest and say…I have never felt as punished as I did tonight.

Being put to bed after my punishment really had an impact on me, he made his point and it came across very clear to me. I am a very stubborn woman and I am used to getting my own way. Seriously here, I realize know that I will not get my way on this.

BUT….honestly…my bottom is not made of steel!!!!!

I give up…you win…..NO MORE then 5 cups of coffee!

I Promise…I Love You and I am sorry

One Coffee... Or One Spanking?

2008-02-14T19:12:00.009-05:00

While I type this Minx is under the covers, I just finished making sure that she would be warm and toasty. It would have been an AAAC (Avoid at All Cost) spanking since we've talked about this too many times before, but she did confess. However, I do think it should have been sooner.

Someone, has a 5 cup max of coffee per day. Considering the doctor would probably have a bird if she knew Minx was even having one... Well, I think the starting limit of 5 cups is reasonable, much better than the 10 or more cups per day before the rule.

However I do expect the rule to be obeyed, Minx does know that, I just reminded her.

I would rather be giving her tender aftercare right now, that will have to wait. I don't want to have to talk about this with her again and I really want her to know that. I don't want...

No, I will not let her endanger her health.

I can't imagine life without her.

Is One Enough?

2008-02-14T17:52:00.002-05:00

You would think that after you have had your bottom thoroughly spanked and paddled that you would behave.

Me? Behave? Hmmmmmm

Well better to confess then to have him find out later.

I bought a cup of coffee that I knew I really should not be having.

I thought many thoughts as I was driving down the road with it in my hand.

Guilty, yes I did feel guilty.

Then to my surprise the cup sprung a leak and I am wearing a lot of the coffee that I should not have bought.

The rest of it is all over the side of my car.

Talk about getting caught red handed!

Guess I better go confess now.

Choosing Your Words

2008-02-14T17:47:00.002-05:00

Lately it seems that anything and everything that could go wrong...is going wrong.

I have been arguing with my sister for a while now and yesterday being frustrated, I just wanted to give up, throw the towel in and just walk away.

Well….of course I verbalized “giving up” and got that the watch moved to the wrong wrist.

Sometimes it just seems easier to just give up but I know that I can’t. I know that in the end I will win, I will achieve what I have set out to do.

Today I was reminded that I can’t give up. Now I am sitting here typing this post with a very tender bottom.

I have a small problem with sass and it seems that most of my sass comes flowing freely when I am getting spanked.

Why that is I will never know!

You would think when you are OTK and being paddled that your words would be chosen very carefully. I was told that “I hope that I never have to spank you like this again.”

My reply….mind you that this was said in a sarcastic tone.

“Then stop spanking me!”

Honestly that was the wrong thing to say at the wrong time!

Yep, I still feel those four words.

The spanking I received today was one of the hardest ones I have gotten. That nasty wooden paddle with holes in it, OUCH! I was also spanked with that hairbrush paddle that seems to be a favorite...not mine of course.

But once again trouble has found me. Now you would think that having a very tender bottom you would make sure that you follow your rules and guidelines.

I am sure that once again I will find myself OTK sooner then I wanted.

Like maybe tonight again!

But...not me! That would be too easy...

I guesss I need to go confess now cause it is sure obvious!

Wrong Wrist

2008-02-14T10:35:00.004-05:00

When a couple integrates LDD into their relationship it's virtually impossible to always take care of matters right away. Sometimes things just have to be postponed. There may be a previous engagement that can't be cancelled, or more likely the lack of privacy.

For as long as I can remember the first thing I do before doing anything strenuous is to take my watch off of my wrist and put it in my pocket or onto my other wrist, upside down. I've always been a watch on the left wrist kind of guy; of course the fact that I'm left handed makes that impossible at times. Obviously, a good spanking from my leaft hand would be too much even for my John Cameron Swayze.

The way I've decided to remember and to issue the promise of the spanking that is due is to use the simple symbol that will be obvious to Minx, actually so that both she and I will remember. I do hate having my watch upside down on the wrong wrist. However, it can't go back to my left wrist until matters have been dealt with.

So, when something has to be addressed that means Minx will be over my knee I've been moving my watch to the wrong side. I hate it there so I'll be looking for the first opportunity to move it back. That won't happen until Minx's bottom has been heated. Naturally, she hates seeing it there too knowing what it means will be happening to her poor bottom. Whenever the activity is over, I will move it back where hopefully it can stay for a while.

Right now my watch is on the wrong wrist. Minx made a little, very little, attempt of talking me into putting the watch back where it belongs and "...let's forget it this time". Simple question right back at her, "Would you really want it to be something that you could ever talk me out of?"

Naturally, her answer is no

2008-02-01T14:03:00.003-05:00

The first time that I ever spanked Minx was a bit awkward. You see we are not very "public", no one in our real lives can know. Well, my middle son was on the way home. He knew that Minx was here and when I asked him to call me before he came home I'm sure he just thought that I didn't want to be surprised by him walking in on some sort of sexual action. Little did he know that Minx needed... and wanted a spanking. I was willing to oblige.

We've talked about it numerous times since then, it was very intense for Minx so we've tried to understand why. Pretty much your eveyday run of the mill spanking in most ways. I started her spanking bare hand OTK. She had been in the corner and I had been scolding her because of some of the things that I knew had been going on. Hmmm... her temper, some anger, some issues at work... patience with her family. Well, we had a lot to talk about and I actually did the talking with the contact of my hand.

Minx was squirming a lot... I knew she had to be thinking "Oh S***!, If this is what his hand feels like the paddle is really going to be wicked!!!" Well, it was :)
Naturally and thankfully, we managed to time an intermission for when my son came home. Well, he's old enough to die for his country and old enough to choose his own evening activities and was right back out the door after a shower, ah the freedom of youth.it's wasted on the young.

When we alone again, we continued. We had been doing a lot of talking and at the appropriate time I told Minx to get back to the corner (not really a corner but close enough). She hesitated. I should never have to give an instruction twice, especially during a punishment. Yup, immediately after her corner time her hands were on the couch, dress up, pantyhose and then panties tugged down... and then she heard my belt coming out of my pant loops. You know, then and everytime since then... Well, there's just something magical about that sound that says "There will no BS, we're dealing with this now!!!"

We both believe that the panyhose she was wearing really, really held the heat in and enhanced the sensation. In any event when the hairbrush paddle came out to find her bare bottom it didn't take long before I could sense her surrender... the first time her walls started to fall.

The absolute most exciting part of a spanking is the tenderness of aftercare. I'm not new to spanking, I've toasted a few butts before. This time things were different, I didn't just feel the intensity of her hugs after the spanking was over, this time it seamed like we melted together into one being. It's been that way with her ever since too.
Anything and everything has come out with this sweet wonderful woman. She has the key to my heart. God, I love this woman, why did it take so long for her to find me :)

Three Weeks, Four Days

2008-01-30T09:01:00.001-05:00

Sort of a whirl-wind thing. We've known each other for about a year and a half but we never met in person before earlier this month, three weeks and four days ago. Minx and I have been friends since we first read each other's blogs. Neither one of us ever thought anything would come of it we were just too far away, well at least I didn't. Now, the truth recently came out! Minx told me that when she first read this blog she wanted to get to meet me. Well, does she always get what she wants?

It is such a wonderful feeling being in love, it feels so new and exciting. Yes, I'm off the market, my heart is now spoken for. I've asked Minx to marry me and she has said YES!!!

Well I went searching the web for Valentine's Day kind of clip art and this is what I found. Now, considering the way my mind works, I'm sure that what they are doing is opening the box that has the new paddle inside.

It Gets Weird

2008-01-16T18:03:00.001-05:00

Ok, so this is both really weird and really wonderful. All of a sudden I feel like some sort of silly teenager. It’s been all of 72 hours since my sweetie was in my arms and for some damn reason it feels like forever. I miss her too much already. I don’t know when we’ll be together again but I do know it won’t be soon enough.

Yes, I know she’s going to read this. Yes, I know she’s going to realize that somehow I must be head over heels for her and acting like some sort of immature teen… Well, I am. Yes it’s true, I’m seriously thinking of running outside and carving her and my initials in a tree with my pocketknife but I would rather wait and do it when she is here. The amazing thing is that I’ve never experienced this giddy happy feeling before, not with anyone else that I’ve met… Not even with the woman that I was married to for twenty years. I don’t believe I’m wrong, somehow I know she feels the same way.

It really was such a surprise, I never thought I would ever meet this wonderful woman let alone become enamoured with her. We’ve known each other ever since I first started bloging about a year and a half ago. But, she was far away and all we ever did was IM back and forth about each of our experiences and befriend one another, and now that has changed. She moved cross-country and now she is within driving distance and the unimaginable has turned into reality.

Yes, she knows and fully accepts some of the wants and desires that have been in my warped head for so many years. We won’t have any problem at all establishing a wonderful relationship including the aspects of Loving Domestic Discipline that we both determine are right for us.

So, how long has this wild crazy relationship been going on? Well, it’s been all of ten days. Yeah I know… You’re all thinking get serious you old fart. Stop acting like a kid and remember you’re at mid life ( if I live to be 104 ).

What’s really weird is that I’ve never before hesitated to describe an encounter either here or on my Yahoo 360 blog in explicit details. Yes, I’ve told all in one way or another. Sometimes with specific details, sometimes with bits and pieces buried into a story here or there. So has she, she blogs too and just like me has put all of her thoughts on the web in an attempt to scream from a mountain top in the most modern way. But now it’s different, yes I want to tell the world but at the same time all of a sudden I think it’s not really anyone else’s business about some of my thoughts.

Yeah, I know… Eventually I will, but for now my thoughts only belong to her.

Please be happy for me :)

Uncluttered Workbench - (Story)

2007-12-03T12:21:00.002-05:00

Dave wanted to make sure that when opening day of buck season came around he would be ready. Although it had been cleaned before being put away in the cabinet last season he wanted to again make sure that his firearm would be in top shape. David spent a good part of Saturday morning disassembling the action making sure that every part was in perfect condition and properly lubricated. Shortly he would be driving over to the range to meet Peter and they would spend the afternoon fine tuning their scopes if needed, and maybe stop for a beer or three.

David took particular pride and care of his workbench, it was spotless and each tool was cleaned and put away as he was done with it. Not quite as extensive as his father-in-laws workshop, it was none the less all he needed for now. He remembered the last trip to visit the family and that comment his father-in-law Ron made was still bouncing in the back of his mind. Karen had been her usual bitchy self most of the day. The men had retreated to the workshop if for nothing else to enjoy the game and avoid confrontation as best as they could. Dave really enjoyed spending time with Ron, his in-laws certainly didn’t fit any typical horrible stereotype. Just as the teams were returning to the field after halftime Karen stormed into the workshop still with her bitchy tone. She was screaming something about wanting to be taken to a movie and the men should try and find something in the paper for them to see. Karen then threw the paper onto the workbench knocking over some things in the process. Ron stood and announced in a firm tone David had never before heard from Ron, "Young lady!" Karen turned very pale and caught her breath and said in an almost trembling voice, "I’m sorry daddy". She then retreated out of the room, David was totally amazed, if only he could turn down her bitch volume like that. "Ron, you’ll have to teach me how to do that", David said with a chuckle.

Shortly the awkwardness of the moment subsided and Ron looked Dave straight in face and said "I’ve got a question for you son, do you still have that jigsaw?" Taken back a bit David said, "Well, yes I do". Ron smiled slightly and said "All day I’ve been thinking about what you need to do and now I’m sure. When you get home take a piece of ¾" oak and make yourself a nice paddle for that wild one’s ass!" Dave was stunned, here was his father-in-law telling him that he should paddle his daughter, his little girl. "Dave, I’m going to the fridge and I’m going to get us a couple of beers. We’re going to have a little talk and I’m telling the girls were going to be watching some movies on the DVD right here at home tonight, I hope you like John Wayne and Maureen O’Hara…" Ron said as he was walking away.

Peter was a little perturbed that he was just on the edge of the paper target so he and Dave spent a good hour adjusting the rifle scope till as close to a perfect inch and a half high on the 50 yard range. Dave kept ribbing away as they moved to the 100 yard range and verified that they were both shooting perfect groups. "Pete your just getting old, it just takes you a bit longer to get the cobwebs out of your eyes at your advanced age", Dave jabbed. "Well Dave, as thanks for you taking the time to help an old frail fart like myself I’ll buy the first round".
Peter and Dave just like their wives had been life long friends and it only took two beers before David was relating the story of what his father-in-law had said on their last visit. David told Peter that he just couldn’t believe it. Peter, as usual listened intently through the story.

"If your done and want to listen to something…" he then ordered another round and looked at Dave and smiled. "Dave, this old fart has something to tell you that’s going to really knock you socks off. Dave, let me ask you. Have you seen any difference in Sharon over the past year or so?"

"Well, yeah Pete for the better actually now that you mention it. I know you two were going through some rough times but now you guys seem like the perfect couple and both of you seem to a lot happier together. Hell, sometimes you two act like a pair of love-struck teenagers it seems anymore. Borders on sickening when I compare to what I live through".

"Well Dave, it’s not always that way, Sharon still has her moments but now I know what to do about them. Well one about a year ago she came home and almost fell over, she was totally tanked and never should have been driving. I was really pissed and we started fighting and somehow it just came out, she told me what she needed."

Peter went on telling the story of how Sharon wanted, no… needed spankings. He mentioned that she was the one who had brought it up and that at the time he couldn’t believe it either. "Dave, we were on a dead end street. I was sick of the arguments that would just get louder and louder till finally they got so loud we wouldn’t talk for days. So, when she brought it up I was willing to try anything. It’s been quite a bit of learning and I’m still learning more everyday. Honestly, I really had a hard time trying to understand how it could be that the woman I promised to protect and cherish wanted me to spank her bottom. It’s all really hard to believe but that’s just how it is.

Dave was amazed that by all that he was reading, he had no idea that there was so much on the internet about spanking. Even more so, he was amazed that there were so many people who seemed to practice discipline spankings. Annoyed at being interrupted, David answered the ringing phone. "Dave, it’s Pete. I just got a call from Dave Anderson, he was on patrol and saw Sharon almost hit a deer and now her car is stuck in a ditch. He said it was right down the street from the Toast-n-Roast. He thinks that’s where she came out of, but he does think she’ll be ok to drive home, he plans to follow her anyway. Well, just to let you know since we talked about it some. One of Sharon’s rules is that she is supposed to call me before she stops anywhere for a drink. Then, she’s supposed to call and let me know when she’s leaving so I can talk to her and tell from her voice if she’s ok to drive. She didn’t call me at all. When she gets home she’s going to be getting a real good spanking. So, I figured I would let you know. I’m willing to bet that she was with Karen" "Pete, I haven’t talked at all about it with Karen and she doesn’t have any rules, I can’t just spank her just like that… just because Sharon is getting a spanking, she gets one too." "That’s not what I’m saying buddy, but it is a chance that you could use to talk about it."

Dave was getting worried, it had been well over an hour since Pete had called and he hadn’t yet seen Karen and she wasn’t answering her cell phone. Just then he heard the garage door so he sighed with relief. Barely five seconds later came the crashing sound. Dave sprung from the chair and ran to the door. When he opened the door he immediately began to steam. There in the cold glow of the garage light was the once perfect car now with it’s mirror shattered and dangling from wires on the side of the door. The front of the car was against the workbench and all of the jars and coffee cans with nuts, bolts and washers now spread wide all over the workbench, and still rolling off onto the cars hood.

Karen nearly fell over as she climbed out of the car. "Karen Marie, you’re shit-faced and now look at what you've done. What do you have to say for yourself." David was actually amazed by his own tone, he instantly realized the voice he was using sounded more like his father-in-laws than his own. Karen took a few steps toward David and tried to stand as straight as she could. She then reached to take the cigarette from her mouth with a failed attempt at being graceful. Quickly she looked back over her handy work, then proudly answered...

"Ooops!"

While she had her sobbing self glued to her loving husbands shoulder last night he had told her that she had a decision to make in the morning when she could think it over with a clear mind. He said she could either decide if she wanted to be held accountable by him or she could decide on a divorce. He had told her that in the morning he was going to get up early and go down the basement and make a paddle. He told her that when she got up in the morning she would find two things on the kitchen counter. He told her that one would be a paddle and one would be a phone book. She could bring him either one of them. "One way or another our lives are going to change big time starting tomorrow morning. Bring me the phone book and we’ll look up some lawyers. Bring me the paddle and you’ll get a real good sample of what you can expect anytime you hurt yourself or our relationship."

It really didn’t take anytime at all to decide, it was a no-brainer. In fact she already knew instantly last night as soon as David’s hard hand landed on her bottom that this was what she deserved. No, it was what she needed. She knew she was out of control, no one could control her, not ever actually, not even herself. Apparently that was all going to change now, at least that’s what David said last night and suddenly she realized that she had no reason to doubt him. Karen knew that she had been a real bitch and now she knew that she could still be a real bitch anytime she wanted. But now she would pay the price with a sore ass. Even worse she had been stupid, she knew better than to drink and drive. The damage was bad enough but she was really disappointed with herself knowing that should could very well have killed herself or worse someone else with such stupidity.

Karen was glad that the noise of the shower was loud enough so she could no longer hear David in the basement with his damn power tools. The worst part was that he was making something awful for her poor bottom. "Well, he’s always been a man of his word". Karen stepped into the shower and let out a little gasp as the warm water splashed on her cheeks and made them sting again. She wished to herself that it wouldn’t be very bad, but she did know that it was going to be absolutely awful. She hated the thought of it, but it couldn’t possibly be much worse than what his hand had felt like now could it.

Karen always knew how much Dave loved to look at her when she was dressed and how he didn’t care for her normal weekend baggy clothes style. Today, she decided she would dress for her husband. Well, actually she was doing it for herself too, she kept thinking about how it felt last night when he lifted her skirt and pulled down her panties and somehow it seemed to be both scary and very erotic to think about. When she shut off the shower faucet she realized she couldn’t hear the noise of the power tools anymore and her heart began to race.
When she was standing there last night and David walked up and took the cigarette out of her hand she almost thought he was going to lean down and kiss her for doing such a nice job of screwing up the car. Instead he leaned down and looked right in her eyes and said "Things are going to change young lady and they’re going to change right now". Within seconds her feet were scurrying to keep up as David had her under the arm and was leading her, no almost carrying her to the living room. It all happened so fast but she knew instantly as she was being put over his lap what was happening. She knew very well that she wasn’t going to be getting a nice kiss when she felt her panties being tugged down. What was really shocking was when David told her that she was going to be getting the same thing Sharon was getting right now. "Damn that girl… I never knew she could keep a secret, and what a secret".

Karen played it all out again in her mind, how it had all happened was very clear and what really surprised her was how content she now felt. There wasn’t any doubt in her mind that within the hour she was going to be crying and screaming and pleading for it to stop just like she had last night. She didn’t care that it was going to hurt, well she cared and wasn’t happy at all knowing that she was going to get a paddling. But, she wanted so much to be back in that same place again where she was last night; leaning on David’s shoulder, crying and telling him how sorry she was and how much she loved him. "Now I know why Sharon has been so stinking happy lately", she chuckled to herself.

David remembered it all very well in spite of it having happened so fast. He had really surprised himself, a few minutes earlier he had been wondering if he could ever talk to Karen about how spanking might help them. But, here he was spanking away, watching his wife’s lovely ass turning bright red right before his eyes. David had been sternly scolding Karen for what she had done. He also scolded her for having been such a pain in the ass. "Sweetie, you’ve been a major pain in my ass for far too long, so now your ass is going to feel some pain". Karen was crying but somehow he knew it was changing, her crying was because she realized how bad she had been and she wasn’t asking for it to stop, she was only saying how sorry she was.

Dave really loved how beautiful his wife was, and he loved how sexy she dressed for work. Her position required that she always dress well and she always did in fact whenever she went out of the house. What bothered him now as he sat in the living room was that she was taking so long to come down. He had a little lump in his throat and felt a bit of panic. Here it was Saturday morning, she had no reason to be spending so much time dressing up. Usually Saturday was a sweat-pants and sneakers day. David was feeling afraid now but could not let that show, he was afraid that she was getting dressed to go out, to leave, to leave him forever.

Karen came down the steps and went immediately to the kitchen. David was dreading and fearing and could feel hollowness in his chest with concern but didn’t want to let on, she had to decide just what she wanted. He didn’t look around the newspaper right away and in fact hadn’t even heard her walk into the living room. He looked up and there she was, reaching out, handing him the paddle.

David reached out and took the paddle from his lovely wife’s trembling hand. She looked both so innocent and she looked scared. David wanted to just get up and hug her but he knew he couldn’t do that yet. Dave mustered his most calm and steady voice and then announced what was clear to Karen to be a firm order. “I’ve got some things to say and you’re going to listen. Now, turn yourself right around and get your nose into that corner and keep you ears open and your big mouth shut.”

Se didn’t hear any anger in Dave’s voice just determination, and that’s what just made it impossible to disobey. Karen sighed a bit exasperated but promptly did just what she was told. She was bothered that here she was ready for whatever happened. It had already taken long enough for her to get herself ready and steady enough to walk into this damn room. Now, it was just going to get protracted out and take longer and longer, she was as ready as she could be and just wanted the whole thing over with. The worst part so far was picking up that scary piece of wood from the kitchen counter. Of course she had to give herself a little quick swat at her own ass to see what it was going to feel like and quickly let out a surprised “OH SHIT” when she realized it just might be a whole lot worse than what his hand had felt like.

Karen couldn’t believe this, here she was, a fully grown mature woman and she was being ordered into the corner like a little bratty child. Then she realized that actually she had been acting like a bratty child every once in a while, just doing whatever she wanted. Well, maybe a bit more than just every once in a while. Doing whatever she wanted whenever she wanted without any concern about how things affected others and she certainly didn’t give a damn what they thought. “Ok, so maybe I’m fully grown but I guess I’m not always very mature.”

Karen was not enjoying this at all, David was going on about all the things that had been happening lately. “For someone who can’t seem to always remember birthdays and anniversaries he certainly seems to be remembering far too many of my escapades”, she thought. Karen was starting to get a bit uneasy and was shuffling from foot to foot. Every time she moved a little, the fabric of her panties reminded her of David spanking her last night and now there would be more to come.

David made it clear that he wasn’t happy. “Honey, this has all just gone way too far. I don’t know why you’ve been acting the way you have for so long but I’m not going to let you hurt us anymore. Well, maybe I do know why. I think you’ve just gotten it into your head that I don’t care one way or the other and I blame myself for that. But I’m not going to make that mistake anymore, ever. From now on, whenever you do anything that could hurt yourself or our marriage you’re going to find that I won’t hesitate to heat up your bottom with a nice firm paddling. What’s more you’re not going to show disrespect for yourself ever again by being disrespectful to me. Do you realize that every time we are out somewhere and you make some sort of wise remark that’s supposed to make fun of me you actually make yourself look bad to whoever we happen to be with? When you make those little snide biting remarks what really makes me mad is that you are making yourself look bad. Yes I get mad, you just don’t see it at all. You seem to think that you’re being the life of the party but the reality is, your lack of respect for me, lowers you. If I’m so bad and you settled for me, what does that make you look like? I can’t stand that, you are my wife and I love you very much and I can’t stand others not being able to see the wonderful woman that I know you are.”

Tears were running down Karen’s cheeks now, she wasn’t liking this scolding part at all, he was right and she knew it. She knew that all the things he was saying were true. She knew that she had hurt him all too often. She just never seemed to care before but now she wanted somehow to take it all back. The things that were in her mind right now were not the fun things that she liked to think about. She was thinking about all of those terrible things that she’s said and done to this wonderful man who she really did love and loved her. She was upset and now she was hoping that this spanking would really, really hurt because she deserved every bit of it.

Karen didn’t have long to wait, she wanted the spanking to start, the sooner it started the sooner it would be over. But, now she was slowly shuffling to the sofa keeping her eyes low, she just couldn’t look at David right now. She didn’t want him to see how much she had been crying. Yes, she knew it was going to hurt, she wanted it to hurt but she didn’t want David to know it. She wanted to take the punishment, she knew that she deserved it and she didn’t want to ever again act the way she had been acting but she wanted it to be her choice to change.

Karen couldn’t help but keep looking at it. There it was, that ugly scary looking paddle on the sofa right next to where David was sitting. It was thick, too thick she thought. It looked big and heavy. It was shaped like a hairbrush but about twice as long and she was sure that before the day was over it would have to be in the fireplace. Unfortunately, she could still feel the remnants of last night’s firestorm on her butt. Her cheeks were still tingling and her tummy was starting to get butterflies and her knees were feeling wobbly. “This isn’t going to be good”, she thought. “But I don’t care how much it hurts, I’m just going to take it and not lose control. I deserve it and it’s going to happen and then it will be over and that’s all there is to it.”

Karen climbed over David’s lap and grabbed the pillow from the end of the couch and hugged it, burying her face into it’s softness with anticipation of what was happening. Karen cringed as she felt coolness as David lifted her skirt out of the way. She lifted slightly to help him as he tugged her panties down. He pulled them down way to far and she began to wonder just how much of her backside he intended to spank. It wasn’t going to be long at all before she found out.

“OWWWW”, Karen let out her protest as David began to drop his hand firmer and firmer on those spots that were still sore from last night’s spanking. Karen’s backside was stinging terribly again and she didn’t like this even a little bit. All she remembered from last night was the burn, the heat that was still there as she cried herself to sleep. How could she have forgotten the sting? Still determined she grabbed the pillow even harder and clenched her teeth, she had no intention of letting out any more vocal complaints. She began to jump and squirm now and couldn’t help it or control it anymore. She knew her legs were kicking now and she now knew she could get away if she wanted to but she refused to give him the satisfaction. “Enough!” she screamed. “Ok, I get it… I’m sorry… OWWW, all right I’ve had enough!”.

After sending Karen to bed last night with her fresh spanking, Dave had gone back to the computer and spent hours on the internet. Dave had expected what was now happening and he knew just what to do. Karen was squirming and kicking harder and harder now so he stopped momentarily and swung his free leg over hers and locked it behind his calf. “The more you fight the spanking little lady, the longer it’s going to last, and we didn’t even get to the paddle yet.”

Dave’s words sent a quick sensation of panic through Karen but her brain was only concentrating on the awful wicked sting that was landing over and over again on her bottom. “Ok, I’m out of here” she thought kicking now as hard as she could and getting nowhere she pushed her hand back to cover her bottom to stop the spanking. David grabbed her hand and pushed it firmly into her te hollow of her back, forcing her tighter against his knee and pushing her ass higher for his easy use. “Ok, that didn’t work” and then slowly she began to realize that she did deserve all that was happening. She couldn’t stop it and was actually starting to get used to it and was beginning to think that yes, she could get through this and just then he stopped. Karen began to freak a bit as se realized this probably meant the paddle was on the way.

Dave wasn’t liking this, he could see that Karen’s bottom would already be sore for quite some time but he was determined that this was going to be a life altering experience for both of them and he wasn’t going to stop. He looked at the crease between her butt and thighs and saw that they too were now very red. During last nights spanking he hadn’t even spanked there at all but his late night research had told him that it was certainly a place to be concentrated on and so he did. He even had landed a few smacks to the tops of her things till they glowed too and it was clear that he now knew how to make her squirm and jump the most. Now however the time had arrived, it was time to use the paddle.

The paddle now landed with more sting and pain than Karen ever could ever have imagined and she was now loudly crying and screaming in unison with each new report. David could tell that she repeated over and over that she was sorry but her voice was getting harder and harder to distinguish from her tears. She was still fighting but the fight was diminishing. Karen’s mind was racing and retracing all of the horrible things that she had done. She knew full well that this was necessary and now it was as if she couldn’t even feel the awful paddle anymore and wanted to be able to feel it and couldn’t understand any of it. She wanted to be held, she wanted to be hugged and she wanted David to forgive her.

David released the lock that he had been holding on Karen’s legs and she practically jumped to his neck. Karen was still crying but the words were whispers in his ear. She told him how sorry she was and she promised she wanted to be his wife forever. “Please honey, promise me you’ll forgive me someday”. Dave was relishing how good she felt he couldn’t remember the last time they had embraced with such an intensity, with such passion. Dave quietly whispered back “Honey, everything is forgive already, I can’t help it I just love you so much”.
Neither one of them could tell the passing of time, but for the two who were still tightly embraced time was standing still.

Karen could feel how exciting this was to be in her strong man’s arms. She wanted it to last forever and wanted more of his touch and she wanted to feel every part of him. The security that she now felt in his arms was such a fabulous sensation and she was cherishing it. Karen could feel the heat on her bottom and the tingle that moments earlier was an intolerable hurt now just seemed a warmth that spread and made her feel more complete now than anytime she could ever remember. Calmer and content she again whispered in David’s ear. Her voice had a sensuality that just sent David a clear message that he would have understood even if he didn’t hear the words. The words she whispered so quietly and passionately told him that there would be no other plans for the day, “Honey, I need you inside me now”.

The Practical Joke (Story)

2007-11-16T11:23:00.002-05:00

Sharon’s memory of the incident was at best vague, it was the typical regretful result once again. The dangerous combination of alcohol and listening to Karen, “Karen did it too me again” she thought. It had been just another in a long series of regrettable things that Karen had managed to somehow convince her would be a good idea.

There was that time long ago when they were teenagers, that first cigarette. Sharon still remembered the first inhale and that dizzy feeling that made her cough and almost fall over. Karen had convinced her that becoming smokers would make the older boys pay attention to them. The reality was that the only thing cigarettes ever got her was the same thing she had right now, a very sore bottom. Sharon’s memory of her mother walking into her room holding that pack of cigarettes was still strong. She remembered seeing her mother holding the cigarettes in one hand and the hairbrush in the other. Try as she might, the only other thing she remembered about that whole spanking was that long comforting hug when it was all over. It had been the only time as a child that she had ever had more than just some attention getting smacks to her behind, yet it was nothing at all compared to what Peter had just managed to do. She thought how she wanted a cigarette now, she had no doubt that such a request in the corner would get an unfavorable response.

Sharon was sure she remembered this latest incident as a bad idea but she didn’t really remember it all that well. If she hadn’t forgotten totally about it she certainly would have disarmed the trap. It had taken a few tries for the tipsy girls to get the shoebox lid balanced just right. Giggling and trying not to make too much noise and waking Peter from his snoring bliss. The shoebox lid that they had mischievously filled to the edge with lilac scented talcum powder was set. The silly prank was supposed to dump on Peter before he went into the woods for the hunt Saturday morning. The trap never did spring that morning, but it certainly did this morning onto his still wet hair and naturally all over his best suit. In fact it was the only suit Peter had brought to the cabin, he intended to be leaving directly for work so he could be early for the big meeting today with that new client. Hind sight, for the lack of a better term told her that she still would have gotten a spanking if the powder had fallen all over Peter’s freshly “de-scented” hunting clothes, not that the alternative could been any consolation.

The couple had planned on going out for a quiet dinner that evening. Sharon knew that dinner plans were doomed the moment Peter walked into the kitchen covered in powder. Naturally, when she first looked up and saw Peter standing in the kitchen doorway covered in powder it had been after she had taken a full sip of coffee. Adding insult to injury she erupted in laughter and the mouthful of coffee had actually given Peter a few little coffee splatters on his already ravaged attire.

Sharon had no doubt that she would be remembering this spanking session for a very long time. For as much as she hated standing in the corner she was sure that right now the last thing she wanted to do was sit down. This had already been the most painful spanking yet from her loving husband. Try as she might it was difficult keeping her hands clasped together, the urge to touch and comfort her hot cheeks was very hard to resist. When she was sure that Peter had left the room she slowly slid her hands down and cupped her cheeks. “Damn”, she thought to herself as she felt her hot swollen bottom. Peter had certainly managed to efficiently braze her behind. The realization that it wasn't yet over forced her to bite her lower lip. “Ok”, she thought, “I really do deserve it, I never should have listened to Karen, but it was really was my fault, I knew it was a bad idea.”

There had been times before when Peter had taken off his belt, dear God how she so hated that sound. Now she was sure that she hated something even worse, the damn new acquisition. On one hand she knew that they needed to own a scary implement that could be used on those rare occasions. Unfortunately this was the occasion and the only thing rare right now was her poor tender backside. When she had placed the order she had considered that the seller might be trying to trump up the wicked device with that comment “Very Severe”. Now Sharon was sure they were actually making an understatement and she knew leather would no longer always feel yummy.

For as painful as the new implement was, the intense sting of the prison strap was nothing compared to how agonizing it was being over the arm of the loveseat. Not being able to be over Peter’s lap not being able to feel his closeness during the discipline, it was a dreadful sensation. This was truly a punishment that she never ever wanted to experience again.

“You just had to rub didn’t you?” Peter asked. Sharon hadn’t even noticed that Peter had returned to the room. “I’m sorry Sir, I just couldn’t help it… I didn’t think you would catch me doing a quick little touch”. “I didn’t, until you just told me”. Sharon heard Peter removing his belt and instantly felt the onslaught of those tummy butterflies. She knew what she had to do and immediately turned enough to bend over. The belt landed a dozen quick times on her already blazing bottom and she was now crying loud and hard as he helped her stand up and back into the corner. “We’ll see if you can remember to be obedient in the corner now, if you’re not I expect honesty, now and every time. Is that understood little lady?” “Yes Sir” was her quiet trembling reply.

The wait for Peter to return to the room had been excruciating, even harder were those words “Come to me now”, always heard too soon. Sharon turned and saw Peter waiting for her, she moved to him and wanted it all to be over. Peter motioned for her to sit on his knee. His hand lifted her chin till she couldn’t help but look in his eyes. “You know honey, I’ll be perfectly honest with you. I had a difficult time not breaking into laughter myself when I came down to the kitchen this morning. Then for a while on the drive back to the house I didn’t think I would have time to stop and change into the other suit for my meeting and I was steaming. I wasn’t sure just what tonight’s spanking should be like, but the more I thought about it the more I was sure that it had to be severe. What you did was very disrespectful to me and it was selfish. Your little joke for the quick little laugh could have ruined the whole weekend for me, not just the inconvenience of having to change clothes. Suppose the trap fell on me Saturday morning when I was going out hunting. You do know that one of the few pleasures I have besides being with you is being able to relax in the woods hunting, that’s one of the reasons we have the cabin. I do look forward to it all year long. You do now that when we’re there during the ski season it’s because I know you like it so much. You know I don’t shi, the only thing I do on skis is fall down. Well, being there during hunting season is what I enjoy, I need that chance to unwind, to relax and I do know you want me to have that. Just imagine though what kind of mood I would have been in having that powder dump all over my hunting clothes. I would have been angry all day in the woods, it would have ruined it for me. Your little childish practical joke would have crashed the only weekend that I can go hunting this year.”

Sharon was hating this, she couldn’t stand seeing the intensity and the sincerity of the disappointment in his eyes. He was right of course, he worked hard all year and she very much wanted him to enjoy his time hunting. She was so happy that when Peter hunted he wanted her close and not 100 miles away back at home. She knew many men wanted their wives that far away so they could have their little Animal House like debauchery filled hunting trips. Sharon did love the fact that Peter only wanted her close always. Peter gently kissed the tears that were rolling down her cheeks and motioned her back over his other knee.

The sting was naturally intense, unbearable and at the same time, was fading, she just couldn’t feel the physical pain. Now, Sharon only felt the regret for what she had caused, that terrible hurt look in Peter’s eyes. That was the most painful thing she could imagine and she never wanted to see that again. Sharon was still lost in her thoughts but was now flat on the bed, her bottom being gently rubbed with lotion. She turned and felt his wonderfully comforting hug and fell in love all over again as Peter whispered his love in her ear. She wanted time to stop forever and didn’t want to ever let go, quietly she whispered those same words to Peter. Exhausted, Sharon and Peter both drifted gently to sleep in each other’s arms.

Walls of Resistance

2007-11-09T13:16:00.002-05:00

One of the most difficult hurdles that an HOH can face is the fact that at times the spankee is resistant, or defiant prior to or during the spanking. No, not physically resistant, but the attitude just fights acceptance. The spankee knows that a spanking is needed and the spanking is actually wanted but there is just a combative mood that can keep the spanking from being effective if it isn’t addressed properly. The spanking is viewed as being inevitable and it is realized as being needed. Let’s call it a wall and unless that wall is broken down or at the very least, has a few cracks created the full benefits of the spanking won’t be realized. Perhaps it’s impatience with the whole procedure, “Just get it over with…” or it’s just one of those days and one of those moods. The spankee doesn’t like this aspect of her personality and she really is hoping that her HOH can bring her back to the person that she wants to be. The desire is there to be on the other side of the spanking cherishing the aftercare, but somehow that seems distant and unobtainable. If the disciplinarian can recognize this wall, this attitude of mental resistance there is a chance that it can be eliminated with careful scolding.

Life has a way of complicating even the most thought out actions and the fact that we are now such a mobile and sometimes distant society adds another dimension. We communicate and plan, often by phone or IM and the plane fact is that often without face to face interaction it’s difficult to really understand the emotional impacts of our words and actions. The result being that often the spanking may have been over planned well in advance. The spanking may have been scheduled or it may have been talked over far too many times or already at too much length. There may very well have been scolding, hours or even days before the spanking has a chance to become reality. The value of anticipation can be lost and that wall who’s downfall is sought may have already been cracked but has already begun to mend. Consequently the value that scolding can add to the process isn’t as strong or as attention getting as it might have been when the need for the spanking was first realized.

Ultimately there may be a point where the full acceptance of the spanking just isn’t going to happen. Continued spanking will only cause physical results and the message that both parties want to become reality just won’t arrive. It might be necessary for the disciplinarian to turn the purpose of the spanking. “I’m just not getting through to you am I? I hope I’m wrong but we may just have to visit this subject again and if we do, it will be much worse.” Give forgiveness and full attention to aftercare, talk it over and realize that sometimes the most important result that may come from the discipline is the reinforcement that the HOH won’t hesitate to do whatever is needed. In this respect what may have originally been intended as punishment may in fact be more maintenance than discipline. There should of course be communication. Talking it over later may reveal that there might have been some aspect of the scolding that may have encouraged anger instead of remorse. In any event it’s not something that should be viewed as regretful, but embraced more for it’s value as it can teach both HOH and partner how to work together.

The HOH must learn lessons too. Sometimes the basic lesson is nothing more than being able to understand that there can be too much build up. Perhaps too much time between the points where it was realized that a spanking was called for and when it finally comes to fruition. Understanding that it’s always better if the peak of emotion can be matched with the act of submission. Remorse for having disappointed the HOH can be much more meaningful and intense, not just breaking the wall but removing it’s foundation.

The Hunting Trip (Story)

2007-11-07T10:00:00.002-05:00

It had been a late night for the girls while Pete and Dave had been off to bed early. The trash can was full of empty wine coolers while the tequila bottle next to the now dead lemon wedges on the countertop told the full story of the girl’s little late night party. The men were intent on being in the woods well before first light so that they could freeze to death trying to kill poor little Bambi. Oh it wasn’t that either one of them had anything against hunting. In fact both Karen and Sharon had hunted before with their husbands, but they were both content to let them go off and do their guy things while they would have their girl time alone in comfort of the warm cabin.

Sharon’s hands weren’t very steady as she poured the tomato juice into the pitcher. Karen managed to squeak out a little laugh past her genuinely tired looking face as she noticed Sharon still with an uneasy sway. Moments later as she took her first sip of the Bloody Mary, Karen remarked how it reminded her of the long ago college days, trying to steady the hands and cool the brain before heading off late to class as usual. Sharon agreed that she was reminded of some of those not so good old days too.

Before long the concoction had done it’s duty and the girls were again laughing and enjoying their time together. After a few seconds of silence Karen said “You know honey, there’s something that I really think you should know”. Karen mentioned that when Peter had interrupted their shenanigans last night and told them to “keep it down”, it had sent a shiver through her, and that she was glad it wasn’t Dave who had come to quiet things down. “Sharon darling, if it had been Dave I might not be able to sit down right now”. Sharon could barely contain herself, she wanted to interrupt Karen and tell her all about what Peter would indeed be doing to her own backside before very long. Peter had used their sign; he had moved his watch to his other arm and seeing that little secret motion had told Sharon that she indeed had earned herself a good spanking.

Sharon was biting her lip trying to wait her turn to speak, yet hanging on every word that Karen had to say about what the two of them apparently now shared in common. Karen began by reminding Sharon of that night they had stopped at the cocktail lounge for a drink a few weeks ago. “Yes, I remember that night all too well,” Sharon chuckled. “Well, Sharon, I did say I would be leaving right after I finished my drink, but I actually had two or three more”, Karen confessed. “It was clear that I should never have been behind the wheel, then I managed to rip the mirror off the car pulling into the garage...” Karen paused then continued, “David was not very happy to say the least and then he did something that I never would have imagined.” Karen went on to describe How David had practically lifted her by her arm and dragged her to the family room and placed her over his knee and there was absolutely nothing that she could do to stop him. “Sharon, my David isn’t a big man, maybe if I had been sober I would have been able to fight him, but I just couldn’t stop him and honestly I didn't want to. I knew I was wrong and I knew I've been out of control and I knew I deserved it and I really think it's exactly what I wanted him to do. I just can’t explain all the thoughts I’ve had since then. My husband spanked my ass till I was crying like a little baby, then he told me that things were just getting started and they would never be the same again. Sharon, every time I think about that night it still gets me excited knowing that my David, my man, won’t put up with my foolishness anymore.”

Karen continued on, telling how it had been only the tip of the iceberg and that since that night she had managed to find out that David was truly a man of his words. She had in fact over the recent weeks found herself numerous times again in that same position being spanked beyond tears. “Sharon, I can honestly say that I’ve never before been able to feel like so much of a complete woman. I really wish that we had managed to add this new dimension to our relationship years ago. I’ve always loved David since the first time I ever saw him, but I don’t think I ever respected him before, I certainly do now. I know now that nothing will ever prevent him from taking action, and that he’ll never again allow me to hurt myself or our relationship.”

Sharon had been having such a hard time keeping quiet while Karen had been confiding in her. She actually did know that the expressions on her face were probably giving her away so she really didn’t have any trouble making that little acknowledgement. “Karen, my Peter is exactly the same way and it’s the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to us”. It felt so good to be saying those words, to able to tell someone. It was especially wonderful to now be talking about this with her best friend, something she never could have imagined she could ever do. She had so much to say and discuss, she knew that she could now tell someone about her most treasured secret and that now she would have someone who could listen intently and not judge or jump to the wrong conclusions.

Karen smiled and said, “Yes dear, I do know all about it. That first time I was getting my bottom burned over my husband’s knee he told me that the same thing was happening to you while it was happening to me. It would appear that our dear husbands do talk to one another. “So,” she chuckled. “Apparently I have you to blame, or actually, you to thank for my poor sore bottom”.

There's Something I Have to Tell You (Story)

2007-10-26T15:17:00.002-04:00

It had all happened so fast, it took longer to think it out than it did to actually happen. Sharon had stopped with her best friend Karen for just one. Well, just one doesn't happen very often does it. It couldn't have been more than a half mile from the driveway of the cocktail lounge when Sharon saw the police car come out from a side street and follow her. Then from the corner of her eye she saw a large buck at the edge of the road just as it leaped in front of her car. Sharon locked the brakes and skidded into the drainage ditch but missed hitting the deer.

As she opened the door to climb out the police officer was already standing alongside the car, his lights flashing to warn traffic around the scene. "Are you all right?" he asked as he shown his light at her. "Yes, except I think I ruined a perfectly good pair of panties...". She was both embarrassed by her response but relieved as he chuckled. The officer took a walk around to the front corner of the vehicle to look over the damage. When he walked back he announced that it looked like the wheel was scuffed up, but it looked like the car would be ok to drive. "I'll call a tow truck to pull you back onto the road and I think you'll be ok...". He returned to his car to make the call.

It wasn't long before the tow truck arrived on the scene and it took very little effort to pull the coupe back to the hard road surface. The tow truck driver looked the car over too and said "You might need a new wheel and an alignment but it'll get you home tonight". Sharon was relieved and also very glad that the officer while taking her information for his incident report, didn't seem to notice that she had a couple of drinks. Then as he handed her drivers license back he said "That was a bit of good driving I saw, good thing you didn't have too much to drink cause that deer could have come right through you're windshield if you hit it". "Shit", Sharon thought, he knows. "I'm Officer David Anderson, if you should need a copy of the incident report for your insurance company just stop by the station". Sharon thanked him as she started the car for her drive directly home. The police car appeared to be following .

Sharon knew that Peter wouldn't be upset by the little accident but the fact that it had happened after drinks with Karen was sure to get her a very sore bottom. It was only a few blocks to home but she raced through the whole scenario in her mind. Funny, not long ago she would have hesitated to tell Peter fearing for the safety of her bottom. Now, these days things had changed, she no longer feared Peter's spankings but craved them for the forgiveness that came when they were finished.

Sharon walked into the house and put away her things, she hadn't seen him yet but she knew from what lights were on that Peter was in the family room reading his paper. "Honey, there's something I need to tell you" she announced as she walked in and sat beside him. Just then she saw that wicked nasty hated wood paddle on the end table. Peter met her stare and announced, "That's right honey, I just got off the phone with Dave, I've known him for years".

It's Just Not Fair (Story)

2007-10-25T10:34:00.003-04:00

Sharon had anticipated that Peter wouldn’t be in a very good mood when he saw the wrong garage doors. She had been the one who was home when the contractor had stopped by for the last change order. She had been the one to tell the contractor of their choice and she had been the one to sign the contract. She was sure that she had shown the contractor the right ones, the less expensive ones that Peter had decided were the only ones that they could afford. Somehow foolishly, she must have specified the wrong ones.

The decision had to be made, the contractor had to place the order and they had not yet come to an agreement as to which doors they would order. Sharon wanted the doors that they both agreed were better looking but Peter was adamant that they were just too expensive. After days of looking at the catalogs and no mutual decision having been reached, Peter made it clear that they would have to settle for the less expensive doors. There had to be a limit to the costs, and the garage doors were the best place to cut back.

Having to be away for the past three days while so much work was being done to the house had bothered Peter. Not that he didn’t trust Sharon to mind the nest while he was away, but she certainly wasn’t as likely to notice a problem with the construction as he would. For as much as Peter was looking forward to seeing the new renovations to the house, he wasn’t sure why Sharon sounded less than pleased when they talked on the phone. When the headlights illuminated the garage doors Peter began to fume as he saw why. Peter certainly liked the look of the new garage doors, he was sure that ultimately they would enhance the curb appeal of the house but they were wrong, it had been one of the few things that they had disagreed over.

Sharon wasn’t really very anxious for Peter to get home, at least not yet. She knew there would be issues and she knew how those issues would be dealt with. The worst part was she just couldn’t understand how she could have managed to have made such a mistake. She wondered why if she was going to make a mistake it hadn’t been on one of the color choices, he certainly would never notice something like that. Well, the best she could do now was to try to lessen the tension, she needed time to devise a plan of defense. Before leaving the bedroom, she saw here full figure in the mirror and thought to herself… "Sorry Ms. Ass, little Ms. Brain managed to arrange something nasty for you". Somewhat almost amused she chuckled and walked from the room knowing the immediate future was cast and soon coming to fruition. She wondered if it would better if she met Peter at the door with a drink wearing only a smile. Too late, the door opened and she saw that look on his face and the anticipation of the evenings inevitable events made her want to run and hide. Not that she could hide, or that it would do anything but make matters worse .

Once again Peter had managed to totally surprise her, not that long ago she had thought that he would never be able to spank her at all, let alone do such a thorough job of it. Staring at the wall was something that she really didn’t like. She knew when she went back over his knee for the finale the sting would be even worse. The scolding and lecture however were the first to bring down her wall of resistance, she hated it, yet it did make it easier to accept the actual spanking and the sooner that happened the sooner she would feel his embrace and cherish his forgiveness. Tearfully, she wanted to make it clear, and she was sure that he did understand that it had been a mistake and not deliberate disobedience.

Embraced in his strong wonderful arms she cherished his aftercare, it simply and inexplicably made the whole painful experience worthwhile. Neither of them budged to pick up the phone, but as they heard the message monitor a hurt look descended on Peter’s face. It was the contractor, he had found out that the distributor did indeed ship the wrong doors and he was offering to split the cost difference. Sharon saw the pain in his eyes as he realized he had just needlessly punished the woman that he loves. Sharon in a quiet content voice said "That’s ok honey, it can’t always be fair. Besides, I’m sure that there’s probably something else that I deserved a spanking for".

It Can’t be Only Physical Pain

2007-10-19T11:21:00.002-04:00

It’s not uncommon for many people these days to establish an online relationship where one or both parties crave the experience of spanking. What can and does happen is both parties become anxious for a date and both arrive not just wanting, but more aptly craving things to progress quickly. Things can and do progress quickly. Inhibitions were probably already removed from the matchmaking equation days or weeks before with long online chats and phone calls. Naturally as can be expected, the basic desires overrule any common sense and the couple rushes to privacy where the fantasies can be fulfilled in the hastiest fashion.

While lying across this man’s knee she begins to realize that this is finally going to happen. This man is going to be taking control and he has every intention of seeing that she is properly spanked for the things that she wants to be held accountable for. This man knows that this woman craves to feel her bottom sting and burn and he will see to it that she gets exactly what she wants.

As the volley of spanks progress she begins to wonder why the hell she ever thought that this was what she wanted. Before long her bottom is stinging worse and worse from the relentless smacks and she just can’t take much more. She keeps waiting for that magic moment to arrive, the pain is unbearable and is rapidly getting intolerable. Everyone on all of the discussion boards always talk about how wonderful it is to be in this position being taken over knee and getting a sound spanking and she can’t imagine why she isn’t feeling the wonderful things that she heard of and dreamed about. What’s wrong, why isn’t it wonderful for her?

Another Experience
This time it’s different, she knows that she has disappointed this man and she can’t imagine why or how she could have been so foolish as to do the things that she has done. This man, who she has come to realize, cares so much about her. He often seems to care more about her than she cares about herself. Now, she’s done it, with her actions she hurt this wonderful man. It’s so different this time, the remorse is real. As ordered she lifts her head and looks into his eyes and sees his pain, his disappointment cuts deeply. Her eyes are welling up and a tear rolls down her cheek. She obeys and hands him the hairbrush and lays across his lap, she wants the spanking to start now, she wants it to be everything she deserves, now she craves and prays for his forgiveness.

As often as she may wish to feel the sensation of losing control, as often as she may dream of having control taken from her. As often as she may crave to feel herself in the zone of knowing that there is absolutely nothing she can do to stop the painful spanking that she knows she wants and deserves, it could be meaningless without one ingredient. That one ingredient would be knowing that she's disappointed someone besides herself. It could be the one item that will help take her to where the stinging pain of a spanking becomes a secondary, it no longer can sting too much. Where the wall falls down and emotions that have built up can come pouring out.

It's Not About the Cuffs

2007-09-05T07:50:00.001-04:00

From the perspective of consenting adults who wish to practice DD, it’s very disturbing when one realizes that often those who crave to give up control to a would-be Head of Household have the potential to be blinded by their desires. Someone who has never been spanked as an adult, yet craves to give the authority for discipline to another becomes very vulnerable and can quickly become a victim of the uncertainty of her desires. Especially when it’s considered that often the would-be spankee believes that what they are looking for is a strong dominant person. Unfortunately they just may find a very strong dominant person or worse, an inexperienced dominant person and then have aspects of D/s play introduced.

There are far more people with D/s experience than there are with DD experience and knowledge cruising the pages and groups of the internet. It’s very easy for someone who wants to find a Head of Household to instead find a Dom. Consequently the would-be spankee in her haste to find relief for these cravings that she feels, willingly accepts that this must be part of what it is that she wants. The encounter can quickly digress to a very unfortunate and disappointing experience. I’m not trying to say that a Dom can’t be part of a wonderful fulfilling experience within the boundaries of a lifestyle of domestic discipline. In fact I believe it’s even possible for a woman to be submissive to her HOH under their chosen lifestyle of LDD and then have what would appear to be a completely different sexual role as a dominant behind the more intimate closed doors of the couple’s sex life with aspects of BDSM play.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with BDSM play. In fact, I can’t help but imagine that many couples who do have a very rewarding LDD lifestyle, do when the mood strikes them practice various aspects of BDSM play. The most important ingredient of such play is the fact that when safely practiced both, or all participants have an excellent understanding of just what is going to happen and that often such play is well choreographed to insure that nothing is left to chance when it comes to safety. The relentless mantra of those with extensive experience with BDSM is Safe, Sane and Consensual.

Yes, spanking can and does invoke some very powerful sexual sensations. However I believe that often what a woman may wish for is a more traditional lifestyle where she can freely choose to give her HOH the authority to discipline her for things that she wishes to be held accountable. Time and again she may have been upset with herself with some of her actions or in-actions and she does not want that to happen again. She wants to be encouraged to meet her own goals. Something of a paradox but none the less real, what is often actually happening here is the woman is choosing her own form of encouragement and that aspect is not sexual. She is looking for a different kind of strength that is not physical. Those base traits of character, integrity and consistency are the strengths that become key to LDD on any level, are also the keys to developing the LDD mantra of Communication and Trust. The fact that her HOH has risen to and accepted the role and has proven to be of strong enough character to do so with consistency and fairness can however act as a very strong emotional and sexual stimulant.

Johnny and Susie

2007-09-04T09:26:00.000-04:00

Johnny and Susie grew up in the same neighborhood and knew each other for as long as they could remember, their parents were good friends. When they were little they often played together but as they became teens they began to have different friends. When Susie was in high school she became very upset when she didn’t have a date for the Junior Prom. Naturally Susie’s mother made a phone call to Johnny’s mother, and well... Johnny reluctantly agreed to take Susie to the Prom.

To make a long story short it turned out to be their first of what would be many dates. Over time they became closer and closer and got to know one another’s dreams. It was right before the Senior Prom when their baser instincts took over and they had sex for the very first time. Shortly after graduation they became engaged and the following June they lived happily ever after. Well, maybe not completely happy. They both had curiosities that they had tried to bring up to one another, you know… fantasies. Without ever realizing it they had each deflated the others temporary openness by saying something completely deflating like “That’s too weird…” or “I can’t understand anyone who would want to do that…”. So fantasies remain only that, just fantasies.

After many years of marriage and parenting, sometimes wonderful times and some not so wonderful times, Susie and Johnny finally grew apart and decided that divorce would the best thing.

It wasn’t long before loneliness began to take it’s toll on Susie and she refused to do any more of those horrid dates with the friend of a friend of someone that used to work with what’s her name. Susie decided to try online dating since it had worked so well for her friend. Well, there were some nice dates and there were some not so nice dates but at least she was getting out. Then, one night while on the internet ‘IMing with a friend, her friend happened to mention that she was surprised how much information there was available n the internet about kinky things.

It wasn’t long at all before Susie began to explore some of the websites that happened to deal with those lifelong fantasies that had been in the back of her thoughts for as long as she could remember. Susie explored and was surprised to find that she wasn’t alone, there were a ga-zillion people out there who had the same fantasies that she did. She began to join some message boards and it wasn’t long before she had a new list of friends that she IM’d with and she began to imagine that she might be able to meet a man who shared her fantasy.

It wasn’t long at all before Susie managed to meet someone online who seemed just perfect. In no time at all they were telling each other their most intimate secrets and imagining their fantasies were being fulfilled with each other. Of course it wasn’t perfectly easy, he was 200 miles away. It wasn’t long before they were spending hours on the phone with each other almost every night and what seemed all weekend long. They both decided that they just had to meet.

It was going to be a safe meeting, they assured each other that it had to be. They would meet in a public place that would be safe, they would have “safe calls”, they wanted each other to know that it would be right. Naturally, nerves were on edge when they first met but within minutes all inhibition was gone and they felt completely comfortable with each other. Shortly they were headed back to his hotel room and the rest is history.

It’s hard to say that what happened with Susie isn’t natural, in fact it probably comes more naturally than the long traditional meeting and courtship that she had with her X husband Johnny, they only followed their basic biological instincts. What is out of the ordinary, is that internet dating has established a new society where time honored standards for meeting potential partners just don’t apply. In fact not only don’t those traditional standards or “date etiquette” apply, they fit a timeline that is opposite of what actually happens online. Even with basic vanilla online dating, dislikes and inhibitions are some of the first things that are eliminated from the equation, unfortunately so are cautions.

Often what we plan and say we will only do and practice just don’t happen with real life encounters. It would appear that often everything from practicing safe sex to having safe calls from a friend are ignored and thrown out the window along with our inhibitions. Extraordinarily dangerous on so many levels, such actions that throw care to the wind can have devastating physical and emotional consequences.

Perplexing

2007-08-27T10:53:00.001-04:00

What seems to perplex many people is why is it that they feel the desire to be spanked. How can it be that many of these same people may never have had the experience of having been spanked as an adult, or for that matter some were never spanked as a child either, yet they crave it so intensely.

What’s truly ironic is that society today has taught us that we should feel free to practice our lives however we wish, yet at the same time has told us that the act of giving yourself to someone else to help provide discipline is wrong. It’s really surprising that those who often profess to be so tollerent and open minded are unwilling to understand that a woman, or for that matter sometimes a man would willingly submit to physical discipline from a partner. I suppose the simple fact is they just can’t seem to understand is that the basic act of submitting to a spanking from a partner can, and often does make a person stronger and renewed.

Properly done, a good spanking can leave your bottom quite warm and sore to the touch. In fact several hours later you may still feel that your skin is hot to the touch and, at that time it may actually be more tender than it was just a few moments after the spanking was over. Of course when the spanking is over there are other things happening that mitigate the pain. Your body has reacted to the assault on your bottom by releasing it’s own very effective pain killers. Additionally if the spanking was done properly, your thoughts are preoccupied with the intense emotions that are flowing through your head. But more importantly you are experiencing the intense dependence on the spanker who is continuing the experience with proper aftercare.

“It’s All Over”, “Everything is Forgiven”, “Everything Will be All Right”…Those words are just as important to hear and as needed as is the feeling of the arms that are cuddling you and just won’t let go. Those arms that moments earlier were occupied giving you an intense experience with a relentless sting are now providing an immeasurable comfort. Someone else, hopefully someone you intently love has given you the gift of caring about you, caring about your well being, caring about your behavior and helping you to reinforce your own confidence, by demonstrating to you, that you are important to them. Rebuilding the strength that is often the core of the submissive partner’s personality.

Very Intense and Meaningful Spanking

2007-06-11T21:15:00.002-04:00

She was getting ready for work and I ordered her over my knee. There was something to be dealt with and I wasn't going to put it off. There wasn't time before she had to leave to finish it all but I promised her that she would be getting a warm-up and an idea of what was to happen later.

She was surprised and not very happy about being spanked before having to go to work but she quickly complied. There was something different from the first few strokes… her reaction was more intense than I had seen before. We had just finished making love and I suspected that her perhaps her nerve endings were still very anxious to accept every sensation with heightened sensitivity. In any event she was squirming almost immediately. I was using the oak hairbrush paddle which happens to be a very intense little device and when used just right I believe sends as much if not more sting than the lexan paddles. It took less than a minute before there were tears, tears have not been easy for her and I think we were both surprised at how such a short session brought them out.

When we finished later she was still tender and once again the tears came easily, escape came easy too, we won't be doing any more OTK on the edge of her bed as it's just too high and too difficult to hold her in place when she gets to the fright and flight phase of the spanking. We finished with her laying across the bottom of the bed and had a very personal time with aftercare.

Here's where I made a mistake that I should know better than to do, what she had dome had earned her two severe spankings. Well I postponed the second one dependant on her behavior. (Yeah an old softie). It will come at any time there is the slightest hint of a repeat infraction. Although I do know that since I had assigned it, it was wrong of me to postpone it. But I was so surprised by how intense her reaction was and the shear terror that she expressed at another spanking like the one she had just received.

No, it wasn't that it was all that bad physically, she has taken much more severe and longer lasting spankings over my knee before. This time however there was a real difference and I think it was her complete submission and that somehow the smacks of the paddle were just multiplied in her mind by the disappointment she knew she caused me.

Submission can be an absolutely beautiful thing.

My Partner and I

2007-01-22T19:08:00.001-05:00

I am chromatically challenged and would never presume to choose anything to "coordinate" without her permission.

I lack the health care gene and will always submit to her decision on matters of health, hers or mine.

Never in my live have I been able to develop a workable budget, her brain must create this. However if she breaks the budget, she gets a very sore bottom.

I do have the technical gene. I must have final say in all matters of screwdrivers, wires, hammers, binary code and gasoline

To our relationship she brings emotional extremes, she chooses to permit me to control those extremes and mold them with stability and consistency. It is her choice to be over my knee.

Her brain is much faster and more multi-directional than mine is, she sees sides of things, every turn hill and valley that I do not. My brain tends to focus on goals. My brain provides the shortest distance between two points; her's the sites that must be seen while on the journey. Yet if there were a relative being visited in Arizona she would be anxious to see the relative whereas I, the Grand Canyon. She is much better at the people thing than I ever will be.

My partner and I are complimentary not equal, equal is not possible at least for us. We each bring certain strengths to our relationship and we choose to defer to each other in matters that they are better suited. So, we each at times choose to be submissive.

Attitude, Responsibility and Respect (Story)

2006-11-24T14:48:00.002-05:00

Sharon tried to think back over the six months that had passed since that first time Peter had taken her over his knee. She was trying to see if she could remember each of the spankings that she had. It’s not that there had been too many spankings to count. Peter being a man of his word had always done his best to make sure that every single spanking would be VERY memorable, something he was painfully good at too. “Oh he is so wonderful and he loves me too” she thought and smiled at the difference.

Sharon knew she had changed so much, Peter had changed too, actually not much at all. The way that Sharon looked at Peter is what had changed most. Sharon now not only loved Peter, she realized that she respected him as a man as well, that is what had been missing before. Oh, there were times when he could, and would still push her button and get her angry, but she could no longer stay angry with him for hours let alone days, thankfully it was no longer tolerated thank God. Now they were communicating and if the conversation started to get out of hand, Peter would no longer tolerate it, he would simply put a stop to it with that phrase… “That’s quite enough. We’ll talk about this later when cooler heads prevail”. Those words, “That’s quite enough…” over the past six months had taken on such a new meaning for Sharon. She thought back how before, they had been keywords to turn up the heat, more volume, anger or sarcasm. Now Sharon knew that whenever she heard those words she was very close to having the heat turned up to nuclear levels on her bottom.

It had been less than a week since that first spanking, Sharon wasn’t sure now just how many days it had been in retrospect, she did remember it had been at least several days as she was no longer squirming on the kitchen chair THAT morning as she sipped her coffee. The first morning after, she could still clearly feel that first spanking’s agonizing glow. The next day after that, only when sitting or moving a certain way, That sensation, the sting, the heat, the tingle, although not a pleasant feeling, was always accompanied by such a contentment and a sense of security that she just couldn’t explain. That morning she had started in on Peter after he left a mess near the coffee machine. Peter had apologized as he cleaned it up, but no… she couldn’t leave well enough alone. She didn’t even remember what else she began to nag Peter about but it built and intensified till finally Peter said “That’s quite enough…”. Unfortunately for her bottom it wasn’t enough for Sharon, she didn’t let it go. Finally Peter went quiet and gave her “that look”… It pierced right through her as he told her in a calm quiet voice to get the hairbrush and wait in the bedroom.

Sharon had obediently gone to the bedroom, she took the hairbrush from the dresser, her hand shaking nervously as she placed it on the edge of the bed. It had not been said, nor implied but she knew what to do next as she then went to the corner and closed her eyes reliving how she got there. Peter would certainly be scolding but she already knew that it wasn’t the nagging, it wasn’t making an issue of the great coffee pot mess, it was the display of disrespect when she ignored her husband’s decision. Peter had decided that the conversation had degraded to argument and he wasn’t going to tolerate that decision being ignored.

As she anticipated and listened for Peter to enter the room Sharon convinced herself that this wouldn’t be too bad, she was glad that he had not told her to get that wicked bath brush, that would be intolerable. She knew it wasn’t going to be pleasant of course, and she knew that she didn’t really want it to be, but she wanted to be on the other side of the spanking and in Peter’s arms. Time in the corner always went by far too slowly, she wanted to get it over with and then found herself thinking the opposite… “Oh God, not already…” as she heard Peter walk into the room.

It had been less than two minutes since Peter walked into the room but already Sharon was sobbing uncontrollably, the tears welled up and streaked down her cheeks as Peter scolded his wife for her disrespect. She felt so much pain for having disappointed her loving husband as he pointed out, that this was the sort of thing that in their past had exploded into days and sometimes weeks of not talking to one another. Peter was determined that would never happen again.

“Come here now” were more words that now had much more power when she heard them from Peter, she obeyed. As she turned she watched as Peter rolled up his shirt sleeve, he then took his wristwatch from his left and moved it to his right wrist. Peter was left handed and she knew Peter was moving it to his other arm to protect it, she wanted her butt somehow moved for protection but knew the only place it was going would offer only presentation and absolutely no protection whatsoever. The sight of Peter moving his watch had made her gasp a quick breath, in the following months this became a silent and secret signal they shared. Sometimes a warning to be missed by others in public, sometimes a promise of what was coming. Sharon quickly learned how to tell the difference, it depended on being paired with “that look”.

Now she was over Peter’s lap and he continued to scold as the first warm up smacks found their target. Sharon said a little prayer asking for this to go quickly, seconds later Peter while picking up the pace announced that this was going to take quite some time and that she would be back in the corner at least once before it was all over.

The intensity of the sting had been incredible, now the elastic bands of her panties were laying right across the most tender spots of her bottom, it stung, tingled, itched and burned all at the same time and she wanted so much to touch and comfort her bottom but she knew better. Hands folded behind her head she concentrated on the pains, the pain from her bottom, but more importantly the pain in her heart that she had come so close to damaging their relationship with her disrespect as she had done so many times in the past. Grateful she now knew that her man would never allow that to happen ever again. He had said after sending her to the corner for the “intermission” that seemingly such a simple of sign of disrespect for him, or for herself would always get her the most severe spankings since they could so deeply cut the bond between them. Through the pain, because of it or in spite of it she felt it so strongly, she thought silently “God, I love this man”.

Sharon was regaining her composure and now was thinking that it just wasn’t fair that men got to wear boxer shorts if they chose but women had to have elastic bands in all the wrong places. Then again the signals that came from those elastic bands could be very strong indeed. Peter knew it too, her panties had been lowered in an almost cerimonious fashion, damn that man does too much research. He knew that the panties coming down and then going back on for the corner time added extra brain signals to the whole spanking experience. Just then Peter came back into the bedroom, as he sat on the edge of the bed he ordered his wife to tug them down so he could see how much more work he had to do… “Devious SOB, he knows exactly what he’s doing to me” she thought, then obeyed.

Peter quietly admired his lovely wife’s ass as he thought this whole spanking thing has a lot of added benefits, in all the years of their marriage he couldn’t think of a single time before when he could have said “Sharon, turn around and drop your panties so I can look at your ass…”. He realized that in spite of being a truly wonderful “Kodak Moment” this had to stay serious and real, he was resolve in not letting this be anything other than the exact discipline his wonderful woman needed. With this new life they were living Sharon had challenged him to be a real man and he wasn’t going to be anything less than that for her. Peter could see that he had left an uneven pattern and there was still more work to do, but he knew that it wasn’t her butt he was spanking but her attitude. They had decided that there would only be three simple rules and that would be that he would always hold her accountable for Attitude, Responsibility and Respect. This incident could fall into two of these categories but he had to consider this an issue of Respect and that had the most potential to be harmful. He had a job to do, he ordered Sharon to pull her panties back up and told her they would be getting back to business in just a few minutes.

Sharon returned to Peter’s lap when ordered, she squirmed slightly to get as comfortable as possible and as she did she could feel that Peter had a very quick response to her squirms under his jeans as she could feel him begin to grow. “Not now young lady, lay still, we’re not done yet” Peter’s tone made it clear that he would not be distracted from what he intended to do. She bit her lower lip and closed her eyes as she felt Peter tugging the panties back down. As the minutes went by just like that first real spanking a few short days ago she felt an intense pain that had to be soothed, that pain was not related to the endless sting landing on her bottom, that terrible pain was not being in his arms.

It had all fallen together so perfectly and she was very content with her sore bottom that Peter was now rubbing tenderly. They were embraced and cuddling for what seemed like both minutes and hours. Peter’s hand now was behind her neck, caressing her ear and holding her close. They settled and laid together quietly, after a few moments she slid her hand along Peters chest, she released the top button of his shirt and then moved her hand down to his jeans to find that what she felt earlier.

They spent the rest of the morning making love like newlyweds. They were now cuddling and laughing. Sharon said “Honey, I’m going to need to run up the credit card a bit. Each time you pushed deep inside me all I could think about was that I had to buy new sheets that won’t feel like sandpaper”.

Last Night (Story)

2006-11-15T08:25:00.002-05:00

Moved this over from one of my other blogs that I've now deleted.

Good morning cutie,
:)
What a nice little smile! You certainly seem to already be in such a happy mood this morning. Well, it was a wonderful night of love making wasn't it. I can't remember the last time we went at each other like that. Of course I don't think either one of us planned it that way did we.

I'm sorry, I know you're still very, very tender, but it had to happen. When you first came home and you were being so... quiet, I knew there was probably a lot on your mind. I understand that, but when you neaarly chopped my head off with that comment... I think it was the tone that really pulled my trigger. I could see in your eyes instantly that you knew what you had just set in motion. Of course when I sent you to our bedroom I think we both knew that it was going to have to be something we both remembered for a long time.

What really surprised me was how instantly angry I became. I didn't even realize I was doing it, but I think it took all of maybe two seconds before I had you over the table with you skirt up, panties down and both cheeks addressed. Yes,I saw the shock in your eyes as you turned and scurried to the bedroom, I was as shocked as you were. I'm so glad we use corner time. It may be unpleasant waiting and not knowing what is going to happen... or perhaps knowing what is going to happen, but not knowing how and for how long, but I would never want to put you over my knee for a long spanking so angry. You do know that it isn't anger that gets you over my knee, it's my love for you.

You know it seemed to take so long, I was both so affraid of hurting you, yet still knew it had to hurt a lot for the sake of our relationship. It doesn't make it any easier. Certainly not as enjoyable as the long sensual erotic spanking we did later last night.

I actually saw you go through all of the stages, especially when the fight was gone and you were still taking it all. Then when you were at peace with your situation... The good part of course was when you rolled over and embraced me... that voice of your's, it's SO sexy... Your sobbing whisper of "...thank you honey for loving me so much". I knew that the only thing that mattered in the world was this wonderful woman in my arms.

Well, it's time to wake you, might be a bit early... but you won't be getting ready for work right away. It might have been too much, assigning you a spanking for this morning too, but I can't go back on it now and I know you wouldn't want me to. Well you know I won't be feeling the sting and tingle that you will be feeling all day long, but I'll still be thinking of you, all day long too honey.

The First Time (Story)

2006-11-04T20:48:00.004-05:00

rSharon was getting a bit antsy as she stood in the corner waiting for what was going to be her first real spanking. It had been such a burning desire for so long to know just what it would be like, to feel so helpless and so much under the control of her loving husband. It had been so difficult of a subject to bring up, Sharon was so affraid that Peter would think she was some sort of warped psycho who needed therapy she had kept her desire secret from Peter for years.

Now as the time for Sharon's spanking approached Peter was calling out her remaining corner time and she was getting very nervous. "Honey, I have to pee..." she told Peter. Her soon to be Head of Household gave her permission to go to the bathroom, and told her that her remaining corner time of five minutes was now doubled to ten upon her return. She almost complained then realized it would certainly be the wrong thing to do. She smiled slightly as she realized she hadn't even been spanked yet and she was already learing to choose her words for the wiser.

Back in the corner she tried to stand still and failed miserably. Peter had already warned her once and said there would be no more warnings. She still had eight minutes to go when she heard Peter get out of his chair and walk toward the corner. Then she heard it, Peter undid his buckle and pulled his belt through the loops. The chill and shiver that went through her body was so strong she became putty as she heard that sound. Peter placed a chair behind her and ordered her to bend over and place her hands on the the seat of the chair. He wasn't going to wait, she had been disobedient in the corner and her HOH was going to deal with the matter right now. Twice he told her to stick her butt out further before that first crack landed across both cheeks. Nine more rapid cracks of Peter's belt pierced through her skirt and panties as if they weren't even there, she let out a scream.

This had been a dream, a fantasy, and now a fantasy that was rapidly coming true. Just two short weeks ago Peter was admonishing Sharon for having stopped with her girlfriends from work for cocktails. The fact that Sharon partook of social gathering didn’t bother him at all in fact he thought important that she have her own friends. However the fact that she lost her footing and brushed off the wall as she came into the house told him that she had probably had at least three martinis and then foolishly driven home. It didn’t take long at all before it was a screaming match, shouting at each other and then, without planing it, without realizing it she let out those fateful words that were now changing her life forever… “You don’t really give a f***, if you were a real man and really cared you would spank my ass raw…”. As the words trailed off her tongue silence erupted with the report of the proverbial pregnant pause. Puzzled and hurt Peter in a quiet voice asked for an explanation. Sharon bit her lip as she walked to the wet bar and poured herself a very tall glass of courage. Mumbling to herself as she slowly took the first sip… “In for a penny, in for a pound…” Then proclaimed, “Darling, you may very well think I’m totally f***ed up in the head but the cat is out of the bag so I may as well tell you it all. I know what I want and I know what I need”.

Sharon and Peter sat for hours talking, mostly Sharon doing the talking and she was amazed that Peter was actually listening with an intensity she had seldom seen. She was amazed to learn that Peter after all these years was telling her that he too had a few secret fantasies, they agreed to explore. Over the next two weeks they had become totally engrossed in each other’s interests and spent hours playing and planing and reading ever last bit of information they could find. Teaching each other about how these dreams would play out. This was not going to be a game, not role play, they both wanted this to unquestionably real.

The discomfort she felt was compounded by the fact that Peter had forbidden her from rubbing her sore butt as she now held her position with her hands folded behind her. "Oh shit, this is really going to happen" raced through her mind as peter announced one minute to go, then continued to scold her for the drving incident that would finally be firmly delt with.

As she was told to turn around, she could see that Peter was now sitting on the sofa, her heart skipped a beat as she noticed the hairbrush and bathbrush within his reach. His curling finger motioned her to his lap. As she waited Peter reminded her one more time that there would be no safe word, nothing would prevent her from getting the complete sound spanking she deserved.

It was too late for Sharon to ask herself if she was really sure that this was what she wanted, but she did anyway and gasped as she felt Peter lifting her skirt and then the tug on her panties. He pulled them down far enough to expose the tops of her thigs and she realized it was a mistake to point Peter to some of the better information about spanking on the internet. His hand was now moving across her butt as he pointed out to her all the spots that would be the most sensitive and that he had every intention of taking full advantage of them. He began with a slow warm up with his bare hand, then Peter announced "Honey, this IS what you need and this is going to make you submissive to me".

Sharon had expected a hot burning sensation and had never realized in all her fantasies and even durring the times that she had smacked her own ass to know what it would feel like... That the reality that was now playing out on her bottom was a sting, a relentless intensifying sting. The sting was building upon itself with every smack of Peter's firm hand and it was really starting to scare her that she wasn't going to be able to take very much of this. "Ok, wait... stop" she said as she moved her hand to block Peter's smacks. "No baby, it's not going to stop and in fact it hasn't even started yet" Peter answered, then grabed her hand and held it in place behind her back and made sure she realized that the smacks were going to get faster and faster.

Sharon was getting upset, Peter was smacking too fast and too often in the same spot, he wasn't doing it right and he was going to make it hurt too much in one spot. She decided that this had to stop now, if Peter wasn't going to stop she decied it was time to just jump up and put a stop to it now. Sharon was furiosuly kicking her legs now and if she had to she was going to bounce herself right off of Peter's lap. Contrary to her plans Peter held her in place and then swung his free leg over hers locking her in place. "No sweetie, you're not going anywhere and I'll be the onc to decide when you've had enough, we're just getting started".

The pause while he changed position barely gave Sharon a chance to take a breath before she lost it all, the hairbrush arrived with a fierce intensity that she had never imagined. Sharon was now crying loudly and began to plead, but her pleas fell on deaf ears. Peter found that the flat of the brush on the sides of her cheeks were really getting a reaction so he concentrated there and changed spots without a predictable rhythym. Every time Sharon thought "I hope not that spot again..." sure enough it was as if he was reading her mind and landed a relentless volley in that exact spot. When he concentrated on the crease between her cheeks and thighs she began to fear that Peter would never stop.

Sharon was begging and pleading now, telling Peter she was so sorry. Peter in a calm determined voice answered her pleas, "Yes honey, I know your sorry, but not sorry enough yet". Sharon wasn't crying out so loud anymore as she mentally prayed that she could faint and wake up as it was all over, but instead was fealing more alert the less she wanted.

Sharon began to realize that this spanking that she was hating was exactly what had to happen. Her man, the man who loved her so much was taking his rightful place as her Head of Household and he was finally proving he wouldn't tolerate her hurting herself or their relationship anymore. Sharon latched so hard onto that acceptance that suddenly she realized that she hadn't even been able to tell that Peter had switched to the bath brush. She did know it was the bath brush, it was so God awful intense and the sting was accompanied by a deeper wallop now. Just as she was sure this was the right thing for her and thanked God it had finally happened Peter switched back to his bare hand. She wanted him to stop so much now, but not because of the pain but because it was so painful to not be hugging and kissing Peter, she needed to be held right now more than anytime in her life.

As Peter released the lock on Sharon's legs and moved her hand free she in one fell swoop was at his neck kissing and hugging him, begging him to forgive her. She began to wimper things that she thought were long forgotten in her own mind, begging him to forgive her, telling him everything as her emotions poured out in her tears and wimpers.

Peter simply whisperd "I know baby, it's all over now, everything is forgiven, everything will be alright... shush baby, it's all over...".

(To Be Continued)

Actually to be continued by you !!

I am asking any reader of this blog to respond with their own version of the perfect ending to this story.

I'll read any and choose the one that best matches my personal dream of how this expereince progresses.

Should they go on to hours of cuddling?

Perhaps Sharon and Peter go into a wild D/s adventure that tests their resolve to make thins work...

Or, perhaps they next try an erotic spanking.... How would it play out in your mind?

Personally I could write this story with a hundred different endings.

But...

I'm asking how would you end this story?

Vince

The Mentor and Spankee

2006-10-29T08:29:00.001-05:00

"My bottom smarts"
"it stings so bad"
"It burns and hurts"
"I can't sit..."

So many women want to be able to say these things. It’s absolutely amazing how many women want to be disciplined and actually spanked till they can't think of anything else. They want to be spanked. They want a man who will take control and teach them to be submissive to his authority in a relationship.

But...
It just doesn't happen that way. For as hard as it is for a man to find a woman who wants to be spanked, it's just as hard for a woman to find a man that she can tell that she needs to be spanked.

So, many women while wanting to find a head of household actually find a Dom. That can be all well and good, or it could be a nightmare. He may work out to be the perfect solution or he may treat her as a doormat which may be the last thing she wants.

As I've posted before it's not domination that makes a good HOH, rather honorable character, integrity and consistency. It would seem that most people have a common view that respect must exist by and between both parties. How can you have respect without those precious traits.

However wherever or however you find these things people should always take every conceivable caution especially for that first time meeting if between a would-be Mentor and Spankee. Discuss it all and understand every step, ask and answer all question even the tough ones. Protect yourself with a call from a friend that knows. Nothing new, but when it feels like it's going to happen all caution goes to the wind, be smart and avoid that error.

Five Lies Women Tell Themselves

2006-10-28T13:13:00.001-04:00

Wow, what an epiphany.

Guys... Wake up and smell the coffee!!!.

The woman in you life may very well want to tell you things... Things that she wants to do... Special things that may fulfill her fantasies. She needs you to have an open mind....

Here's the scoop:

I've spoken with more than one lady who has found her way into the world of DD through D/s or BDSM. In fact I've spoken with, or had LONG involved IM discussions with women who:

1) She’s was sure that you would NEVER agree to spank her.

2) She’s sure that you are SO square that if you heard her fantasies you would call a lawyer to find out how you could have her committed

3) She’s convinced that you'll never understand that SHE HAS FANTASIES TOO !!!! (because she doesn't know you have them).

4) She thinks that you would never let her try to find your 'G' spot. (Yes, you have one too)

5) That all you want is a quick lay or a nice BJ... and a cold beer... Well, you do!!! But more is nice too... but they she doesn’t know that.

These poor women just don't understand that we guys do have more than a passing interest in sex. The poor things think we just want to pump out a kid or two, get a nice BJ now and then and call it a day. The poor thing just doesn’t realize that we might actually be willing to climb into bed with both her and her fabulously large breasted best friend along with a bottle of chocolate syrup.

Yo...
(I'm from Philly)

For GOD sake tell her you like sex!!!

No Safe Word

2006-10-21T06:11:00.001-04:00

It's impossible to explore the BDSM world without having a firm understanding of Safe, Sane and Consensual. They are the magic words that bind and set the boundaries of safe sex play. Everyone who plays this way must have/use a "safe word". One couple may decide that "Red !!!" will make everything stop... "Yellow" means "I'm getting scared. and green means give me more asshole you're not being hard enough with me. No matter... In the world of LDD it can be just the opposite and a couple that has decided to push the edge of LDD may very well decide that Safe, Sane and Consensual have no place in their bedroom. To do so requires and intense trust and complete communication.

When she is ordered over his lap she may may want to know that she does not have a way of stopping the inevitable spanking. She may very well want to know that absolutely nothing will, or can prevent or protect her from getting a her life altering bottom warming.. She may want that kick of knowing that all control is taken away.When there is such a surrender of control there is compete trust and an intensity that can not be described.

We Truly Are a Creative Lot

2006-10-14T09:22:00.001-04:00

Since spanking can be such a mind game I was wondering just which implement got the most attention from bottom/subs when it was realized that a fresh cheek warming was coming their way. That initial attention "Oh Shi* Factor" can have such an impression on the perceived severity of the forthcoming spanking.

This morning I posted a little quiz on my Yahoo 360 page, I started adding the typical things, paddles and such and then I realized that the list could be virtually endless and left a simple "Other" as the last choice for everything else from wooden spoons to canes. Realizing that the general spanko community is full of creative minds and at the drop of a hat we can look at virtually anything and wonder just how it could be used and might it be an effective implement. We truly are a creative lot aren't we?

I'm anxious to see if anyone comments with a "You should have had "X" as a choice because...".

Inquiring minds want to know.

Is It True?

2006-10-04T18:35:00.001-04:00

This entry started as a reply to sassyminx who commented on my previous post. I decided it needed an entry of it's own. Oh, well... perhaps it's silly to spend so much time wondering why we, who do TTWD, do this thing we do...

Does a submissve regret the disapponitment that you've caused your HOH more than the pain of the spanking?

Do you think this brings a D/s (as in BDSM) aspect to the relationship?

or...

Perhaps, do you think that that practicing LDD makes ones want to avoid the consequences of pain or dissapointment equally?

or...

Do you crave the pain of the punishment spanking because you know that with it comes forgiveness and aftercare?

Perhaps what drives you is the need for a 24/7 in the home. You are in control in your profession, but don't want control at all in your private life.

Just some thought provokers...

Tell me what you think, makes you crave LDD.

Pain or Pleasure

2006-09-30T13:53:00.001-04:00

The head of household has ordered his partner to the corner, at the appropriate moment he then orders her to his side. He clearly explains what is going to happen, she is going to be spanked. He’s made it clear that it’s not going to be quick and done, this will take a while. By the time he is done he intends to have completely secured her submission to him as her HOH.

Her skirt has been raised, her panties are down, she is laying across her HOH’s knee, she knows that there is no escape as she waits for the spanking to begin. She feels the first light slaps find her still cool bottom as the warm-up begins. The slaps are not very rapid and in fact are happening very slowly, there are pauses as he caresses between slaps. The spanks are coming harder now, in fact, very hard but still not very fast. The smacks sting and warm her bottom but it’s a good warm, the sting tingles and it’s spreading to other areas. His hands are roaming more and more, fingers are probing everywhere between smacks and instead of kicking and trying to escape, this time her pelvis is thrusting upward to meet and welcome every hard smack. She knows the spanking is getting very intense but she no longer hates the pain, she now craves it. She is somewhere different now, floating like an out of body experience and all sense of time is gone. The HOH is totally amazed at the response from each swing, there appears to be no end to her pleasure, she wants more and more.

What has happened here is that with very little difference in the actual process of spanking, pausing and probing and caressing has taken what would be an act of discipline and turned it into an extraordinarily erotic experience. The preparation, the words that were spoken, all similar but profoundly different and the intended destination of the spanking was different too. I’ve said before that one does not spank the butt, it’s merely a conduit to the brain. This time it has become a conduit to indescribable pleasure.

What is illustrated here is the power in the words and delivery. That swing with the stingy paddle can have a profoundly different response when it lands on the bottom. How it was framed, with scolding and other preparation a spanking is sent to the emotional core and the sting in the butt is small compared to the pain of knowing she caused her HOH disappointment.

The Different Stages of a Spanking

2006-09-03T14:22:00.001-04:00

I found a file on a Yahoo group. The file was posted by ddsamantha13, it appears to be a pretty good analysis of the different stages and thoughts that go through a submissive's mind during a spanking. What I'm going to do is quote the list, and comment on each item.

1. Submission to the spanking.

Time to submit, I am either required to bare myself and wait for him to enter the room, or he walks with me down the hall, holding my hand, leading me. Sometimes I pray: Lord forgive me for X. Father I give you this rebellious spirit and ask that you replace it with your Spirit, making me a treasure before you and my husband.

Other times, I have prayed WAY before the punishment and I am now either so overcome with remorse for what I have done--or I am in full dread mode because I know I truly deserve what is about to happen to me.

When it comes time to actually assume a position or retrieve an implement, I am usually embarrassed. Especially if he requires me to make eye contact.

Sometimes the punishment is proceeded by talking --WHILE I am in position. I am asked if I know why I am being punished and I am required to give an honest answer. If it is incomplete, or incorrect, I am told exactly WHY I am in the position I am in. I am asked if I FULLY understand. Then, the time for talking is over.

The submission began long before "The walk down the hall", of course it began with her decision to trust her HOH and give him the authority to hold her accountable. This isn't play and she knows it's not play, it's real because she and her HOH want it to be that way.

2. I can handle this.

Sometimes I skip this stage... if he starts out with lots of gusto. But if I enter this stage it is usually because I am a bit pious about my abilities to contain any emotion that might give him a sense of satisfaction. At this stage I have a wall of PRIDE, that I am not going to let him see me give into this pain... (Just remember Pride goeth before the panties fall... Or just after they fall... *said grinning*). Some times, if I have a defiant attitude about the punishment, I try to turn this into a battle of wills. He is NOT going to see me hurt!

She's describing a slow build-up and warm up for this stage, the way she describes it's as if she doesn't like her "Wall of Pride" and defiance, she'll be happy when it is gone and it won't be long now.

3. Ouch--that hurts.
My mind is beginning to spin and really think. It is usually not thinking on what got me here, but that it is hurting a bit more, but I am still not giving in. No way is he going to see me squirm! I MIGHT be starting to be a bit worried at this point.

The spanking is building upon itself and she's starting to remember that this isn't going to be pleasant.

4. Ouch that REALLY hurts.
Even closer, I am probably squirming quite a bit, repeating a mantra, of STOP I got the point, okay, pleeeeze stop, but still not thinking through why I am here. Besides the squirming, if I am OTK, even though my legs are trapped under his leg, my feet are trying to run the 3 minute mile....kicking frantically. If my head is in my pillow....I am squeezing it and biting it to not cry out too loud. I'm starting
to sweat!

The HOH is doing an effective job, but the job certainly isn't done yet. She's no longer trying to hide that it hurts, she's vocally admitting the spanking, but she hasn't accepted it yet. "Ok I get it" or "I'm sorry" at this stage just means the HOH needs to keep going, there's more work to do.

5. OK---ENOUGH--STOP!!!!
PURE PANIC sets in! Is this ever going to stop? I have to get away. The struggle becomes intensified. At this point the tiger is waking. FLIGHT-- or--FIGHT seem the only options.

The submissive has really begun to realize that the spanking is not optional. She's not going to make the storm on her butt go away with words, her natural instinct is to escape the pain. The HOH needs to make sure that she can not get away or the effort so far will have been a waste.

6. Full fledged anger and pain avoidance

(may physically fight HOH and need to be restrained or firmly held down so they understand that escape is NOT an option)

I AM NOT STAYING PUT ANY LONGER! BYE! I AM DONE-- CATCH YA LATER!! LET ME GO!!! NOW!!!!!!!!! Tiger is fully awake and In attack mode. My body is REALLY fighting now and all of my strength is fighting to escape. I am MAD!!! STOP IT!! STOP IT!! STOP IT!!!!!! OH GOD......PLEASE MAKE HIM STOP!!!!

This is like the previous stage but now her anger and desire to escape isn't just hot, it's boiliing. This is a very dangerous time, if she were to actually escape that tiger she describes would turn the tables and surely consume the poor unsuspecting helpless HOH.

7. Acceptance of punishment
(as shown by stopping fighting And accepting the spanks--HOH should be sure and continue for just a short bit at this point)

Now I know I can't get away so I think about why I am here (briefly) but it is very necessary for that to happen. The tiger is panting and out of fight...and is now accepting of her fate. She is starting to understand. No fighting now... just a slowly building awareness that a wrong has been done... and the price will be paid.

This stage is the first sign for the HOH that there is an end in sight and the job has been done properly. She now knows that her HOH has held her accountable, not just this time but she knows he will the next time too. There has been a special memory created, spanking the bottom has gotten to the brain.

8. Repentance
(need to be forgiven and vow to not do again)

Pride is gone! Why I am here has been thought through, and he has made sure I WILL AVOID AT ALL COSTS, any similar incident. Guilt is gone, and forgiveness granted.
Sweet Sweet, Sweet. What an act of love... by both of you! YOU, for your submission, and HIM, for his strength and leadership in your relationship. All is again right in your little corner of God's world.

This is the Holy Grail of Loving Domestic Discipline. This is the most important part of the whole spanking. The HOH must forgive her, he should tell her that everything is forgiven, everything will be allright. The emotions that flow forth must be accepted with as much aftercare as needed, nothing else matters.

"Guilt is gone, and forgiveness granted. Sweet Sweet, Sweet. What an act of love... by both of you! ... All is again right in your little corner of God's world."
What a wonderful sentiment.

I Was Wrong. Maitenance IS Important

2006-07-22T10:45:00.001-04:00

Like many men and women after my marriage failed, and after years of little sexual excitement I gravitated to exploring BDSM. While there are many aspects of BDSM that I do like to explore, when I learned about Loving Domestic Discipline I realized that it was something more. Something more that had been missing from my life, specifically from my relationships. The concept of a happy household didn’t seem like an impossibility anymore. Like many of my age I grew up watching Donna Reed and the Nelsons. Their way of life had not become mine, it was all fantasy. Of course when I discovered LDD I read everything I could find about it, joined many Yahoo groups and read every blog I could find written by those who had established and were living in such relationships.

Of course the most important ingredients of LDD are trust and communication. Once they are firmly established, most couples seem to progress easily with perhaps a “health word”, but without a “safe word” which of course is an absolute must with BDSM. The underlying point being that LDD has to be real, not a game, absolutely nothing will prevent or stop that butt from getting sore. That’s why I initially had such a tough time accepting the need for Maintenance Spankings. Maintenance Spankings just appeared to be a contrived reason to spank, just fulfilling a spanking fetish. I was wrong.

I’ve come to believe that Maintenance Spankings could just be the most critical and necessary ingredient in a successful LDD relationship. For every couple? Of course not. I would caution anyone from ever taking the tact that LDD can only be done by their standards. In fact that’s one of the most critical dynamics of a Maintenance Spanking, giving the relationship the opportunity to communicate and explore, finding ways to make it stronger. Here’s a basic template for a Maintenance session:

Start off with a schedule, pick a day and time that you will likely be able to keep every week. If it is Saturday afternoon, it should be Saturday afternoon every week. If life throws you a curve ball and you have to postpone of course do so, but postpone, never cancel. Even if it has to be postponed till the following Saturday morning so be it. The Top will have to have an extra sore arm by Saturday night as the bottom’s butt must be treated twice in that day. Or the next day, but you get the picture. When you have some more experience “under your belt” so to speak, the Top and Bottom will have the opportunity to discuss and decide for themselves if once every two weeks or once a month or for that matter several times a week would work better for themselves. Nothing says you two can’t decide as you go, but it should be a mutual decision. Of course your mileage will vary.

Get together and talk, the conversation should be what you both expect and what your thoughts have been with how LDD is working for you. Decide how you both can use it to strengthen your relationship and make you both better. Of course avoid just making it a bitch session, if it turns into one put an end to it just like any argument. Cool heads must always prevail, revisit it when you both can talk and never argue, it’s not the time for anger. If either of you have anger, corner time before butt warming.

Maintenance is the place to explore, if you have a new implement this is the time to try it. IMHO you should never explore a brand new implement during a punishment when you won’t have the time to exchange feedback.

Severity should be just as intense as a basic punishment spanking, it has to be real. No, not a “you won’t be able to sit for two days” spanking but you’ll need to see all the stages, impatience straight through past tears to acceptance and full submission.

Maintenance Spankings offer the chance to reestablish the authority and reinforce or fan the flames of your mutual respect.

Although it should IMHO be severe, it’s Maintenance, not a punishment. Even if you use an implement, consider starting and finishing with bare hand OTK. Bare hand OTK… the touch, adds a closeness that doesn’t pass through the handle of a hairbrush.

Time permitting the aftercare should be as long and passionate as possible, at the very least never neglect aftercare for a Maintenance Spanking. Many couples report that they find the intensity of the experience leads to fabulous lovemaking. Yes, it has to be a real spanking and not an Erotic Spanking and not any kind of play. But nothing says when it’s over that you can’t play as much as you both desire.

The Benefits of Scolding

2006-07-16T12:46:00.001-04:00

At the very least right before a punishment spanking starts there should be a “talking to”. It’s very important to reinforce and in the case of a punishment spanking, actually rebuild submission. Therefore it should go without saying that scolding can be a very big part of a punishment spanking, by setting and controlling the mood. It doesn’t have to be long, berating or intense enough to bring tears before a smack touches butt. It does however have to be a clear explanation to the bottom why she is getting spanked, she should of course agree that the forthcoming spanking is well deserved.

The scolding doesn’t have to be a two-way conversation, it can be a lecture during corner time. It should however be punctuated with properly placed questions to keep the attention and to make sure she is involved in, or agrees with the decision that a spanking is called for.

HOH: “You, never should have tried to put off taking care of that matter. It would have been so much simpler for everyone if you had simply taken care of it as soon as you knew it had to be done. Is there some reason why you thought it had to be put off till the last minute?”
SO: “No Sir”.

HOH: “Then perhaps I should blame myself for neglecting your discipline.
SO: “No Sir”.

HOH: Perhaps our maintenance isn’t often enough, or severe enough to remind you that I will hold you accountable, did I somehow give you that impression?”
SO: “No Sir”.

HOH: “Did you think that when I found out I would simply ignore the matter?”
SO: “No Sir”.

HOH: “Then I can assume that we both agree that you deserve to be punished?”
SO: ”Yes Sir”.

HOH: “Do you know what I’m going to do about this matter?”
SO: “Yes Sir”

HOH: “Tell me what’s going to be happening here in a few minutes”
SO: “You’re going to spank me Sir”

HOH: “Well that’s part of it I suppose. Actually I’m going to be teaching you some lessons, lessons that I had hoped you would have learned already without forcing me to spank you. I’m going to remind you that when you have something to do, you need to do it and not procrastinate. I’m going to remind you that I will hold you accountable, because you want me to. I’m going to remind you of your submission to me. I’m going to remind you that I will not ever ignore my responsibility and that the consequences of disappointing me can be severe and are best avoided. If I don’t sense that you are truly sorry, we’ll be doing this again until you are. Do you understand me?”
SO: “Yes Sir”.

These questions and statements don’t have to be right after one another, they can of course be several minutes apart during corner time. The significance and intensity will be far greater and you’ll be much more likely to force her emotions to release freeing and clearing her mind and heart of everything until the only thing left between the two of you is love.

These things, some or all need to be said, always remembering that you’re really spanking the mind, not the buttocks. These things, some or all do need to be said, but never yelled. If you’re yelling, you need to calm down before you go any further.

Loving Domestic Discipline v2

2006-07-04T12:17:00.002-04:00

The thought of an LDD, Loving Domestic Discipline relationship has captured me. I've come to the conclusion that I will never again settle for anything less in a relationship. It's what I seek, it's what I crave and the only way I will ever have the perfect love.

I'm certainly not the only person with this opinion, in fact I'm more amazed every day as I find out about more and more people who are "de-lurking" and "coming out". I read a number of blogs about LDD on a regular basis and some message boards such as Spanking Classics Story Board and on a regular basis there are a number of people who sign on and say they've been reading for some time (lurking) and they've finally decided to join the board and take part in the discussion. They often say they have just started, or wish they could start a DD relationship with their spouse. Additionally there are people who sign on and say they and their spouse have been practicing a DD relationship for years. Who ever knew.

See also: How to Tell Your Thick Headed Husband

The Dominant HOH

2006-07-04T10:29:00.002-04:00

I've talked with several women who thought that what they needed was some form D/s or power exchange, They are usually of strong will and do not lack confidence yet they desire to give up control in the home. They gravitated to some sort of BDSM experience but had no interest in being the typical submissive or slave, that wasn't what they were looking for. One way or another they found out about Loving Domestic Discipline and now they've decided that it's the kind of relationship that they've always needed.

I've also read quite a few posts on bulletin boards written by women who say they are looking for a dominant man who will able to rise to the role of HOH. These women have a need to respect and be respected. On the other hand, too often waiting for them is the Dominant who will treat them like a doormat and that is not what they are after either.

So the point that I suppose I'm trying to make is that I don't believe a Head of Household need be of dominant nature in the D/s sense, but he does need to be strong. Seeking an HOH or seeking to be one... it's strength of character, integrity and decisiveness that are traits that must be sought and developed.

Once in a dynamic LDD relationship the ongoing need for respect, consistency and fairness can best be served with these old fashioned traits and nothing less. Remembering always that the HOH must live to a higher standard, the relationship makes both parties better.

Some Spanking Techniques

2006-07-04T10:21:00.002-04:00

I can not proclaim myself as an expert, however what I compiled is the result of considerable reading of the thoughts and experiences of myself and others. Your mileage may vary, this isn't the only place to do reasearch. Ok, disclaimer out of the way.

There is no one right way to spank, there are however many wrong ways. Wrong way would be to weave erotic play into what is intended as a DD action. Another wrong way would be to injure, the beauty of the bottom… well actually there are many beauties of the bottom, but I digress. The beauty of the bottom is the ability to provide an attention getting memorable experience without permanent harm. The most important thing to remember is that it’s not the bottom that you are talking too, it’s all in the mind and the bottom is the conduit.

Clothing
Every couple may have their own preference for clothing during a spanking. Consider however the advantages of both the man and woman being fully clothed up until the moment the spanking begins. The core desire here is to keep this fully separate from erotic spanking. Many couples have dress code rules that specify skirts and dresses always unless permission is given otherwise. In day to day happenings she will always be aware that all it takes is a quick bend, lift of the skirt and tug of the panties to put her in her place. When she is ordered to hold up her skirt or pull down her own panties in preparation, the anticipation this brings is a powerful thing for the mind.

Position
One of the most important aspects of making the spanking effective is positioning. Positioning can and I believe should be different depending on just why she is being spanked.

Maitenance
My belief is that Maintenance Spanking should always start and finish over the lap or over the knee. It’s a natural position of submission and the closeness provides mental benefits for both of you. Most men will find that over the lap just doesn’t work very well, after a few minutes when her bottom starts to really light up she may start kicking her legs and even reaching back with her hands to stop the smacks. That can be very dangerous and you both could be injured. What works better is the classic over the knee position, also known as OTK. To do OTK she is laying over just one of your thighs, your other leg is wrapped on top of her legs holding them down and effectively preventing her from kicking or escaping. Her back is being held down with your free arm or, if you are right handed you are holding her right hand behind her back with your left hand. If she is fighting hold her wrist firmly, if she has submitted hold her hand, the closeness is enhanced and reinforces her submission.

Punishment
Punishment spankings can and probably should be a bit less personal at the start depending on just why she is being spanked. They should especially at the beginning, be much more formal, corner time is almost always a must before and between innings. You can build up the anticipation while she is in the corner, letting her hear the clatter of implements, calling out the minutes until the session begins, and providing calm scolding for the infraction that put her in this position. It’s also worth while at this time to mention to her that you really don’t want to do this and you would rather be doing something else, but she has forced you to do this.

For punishment you should consider more latitude for positioning, you of course must be comfortable. She doesn’t have to be comfortable and if she’s not, so much the better to a degree but she should be at least comfortable enough to not be distracted by the position. Her attention needs to be held by what’s happening to her bottom and not too distracted by the position. Bent over a chair or table, at the foot of the bed or even lying on the bed with her butt propped high on pillows are all good methods. The position can add a tinge of humiliation and that can be enhanced in several ways. Particularly useful if she got herself this spanking with arrogance or disrespect. If her bottom is propped on a stool or other firm item that won’t move, be aware that each smack will be much more powerful as there will be no give.

Impements
It should be noted that large or heavy paddles may pack quite a wallop and certainly get attention, but then bruise or if used with too much force actually to some serious damage. Be very careful, try some whacks on your own bare butt before introducing something new, know what you are using. If she is small in stature, petite or with a tiny-hiney feel where her pelvic bone is, avoid it and concentrate on those two pillow mounds. The best items to use by far are lighter things that may provide less impact but a world of sting.

The most natural implement is your hand.
Your hand also will feel the most personal to your significant other. Unfortunately your hand will most likely not be up to the task of giving her the proper spanking that she wants and needs. The first attempt at delivering a spanking will probably happen with you holding your hand firm and swinging as hard as you can. Well you’ll only be able to do that about for a dozen swings at the most. Doing so will make your hand sting more than her bottom and you’ll quickly lose interest in that. You can prolong the usefulness of your hand by using a limp wrist with your fingers open and relaxed.

Other items can vary greatly from the specialized paddles and floggers to the use of everyday items. The breadboard that hangs on the wall with the "Home Sweet Home", useable like a school paddle for a few smacks, certainly too massive and easy to overdo. However, every time it is seen, caught out of the corner of the eye, for days and even weeks after, the memory will return. Her hairbrush if its maybe 2 ½ by 4 inches, probably looks a bit small but if it’s shaped right, flat or with a small convex, capable of an intense sting. It’s obvious that her hairbrush will be a daily reminder. Remember that little toy you had as a child? The paddle with a ball at the end of an elastic string… very light weight… intense sting. Remember it’s not heavy pull for the fence swings, they will wear you both out way too soon. Try very rapid light smacks, they’ll feel like a sitting on a hornets nest.

How to Tell Your Thick Headed Husband

2006-07-04T10:14:00.009-04:00

I've spent a lot of time reading everything I can find on LDD or Taken in Hand relationships. I've read a lot of posts by women who are frustrated and don't know how to tell their SO what it is that they want and crave.

So,
I decided to write a little Domestic Discipline "Primer" from a guy to guys that a woman could copy, edit and print off. Then place it under his coffee mug some morning....

No, better place it on top of the mug otherwise he might not see it. Then, all the needy lady has to do is place a nice hairbrush or other scary implement on his pillow or dresser and patiently wait for the fireworks to start.

So here is: Loving DD

The reason you are reading this is because the woman in your life has something to tell you that she doesn’t know how to vocalize. How can that be? For as long as you’ve known her, she certainly has never before been at a loss of words. Well this subject can be sensitive, she doesn’t know how you will react or what you will think of her.

She wants to change the doubt that she has for this and any other subject, she wants to build a firm foundation of trust and communication for not only this subject but for all subjects so she can know that she can talk to you about anything. Ok, this is already starting to sound like it’s going to be a major pain in the butt, well it will be a lot of work and require a major time commitment for both of you. Let me assure you, it certainly will be a major pain in the butt, the good news it won’t be your butt.

A Strong Woman
Your lady is probably a strong confident woman of character, perhaps well educated but none the less she just about always knows what she wants and seldom if ever hesitates to do whatever is necessary. If she works outside the home she may hold a position of authority with responsibilities that she handles skillfully and or charge of a number of employees.

So how can it be that a woman who may be strong in so many ways has such a difficult time letting you know what she really wants you to now do?

Because, there are sometimes things she doesn’t want to be strong about, at least without your help. There’s something that she wants you to do instead… she wants you to take a more active part in your relationship. She wants you to hold her accountable for her safety, attitude and responsibilities. She's asking for your help.

If she endangers herself, or anyone else for that matter by doing something foolish like driving home after having too many cocktails with her girlfriends… Well, she wants you to take action that will prevent her from ever doing it again!

If she was moody, rude, or down right bitchy to you, or for that matter anyone… Well she wants you to take action that will make her think twice next time before opening her mouth and inserting foot.

If she kept putting off writing the check for the credit card and now it’s late… Well she wants you to take action that will make her want to get those things done that she knows she has to do. She wants you to accept the responsibility of holding her accountable and teach her a lesson that she will be able to remember for a long, long time.

There are other things too.
The next time you two argue, she wants you to put your foot down and lay down the law that there won’t be any more arguing.

She wants you to say "That will be quite enough, we’ll talk about this later when cooler heads prevail!".

She doesn’t want you to make a major decision without her input or agreement, but she does want you to take control of the debate when it’s in danger of being an argument. She wants you to take action. No stupid, not action on the subject, action on the method of conversation.

If she should fail to respect your decision that it wasn’t a conversation, if she doesn’t accept and respect your opinion that no progress was being made, just the same points being berated and restated in louder volumes. If she fails to respect you in any manner during the incident she wants you to take action so that she’ll never do that again. If she does ever forget in the future, she wants to know that you will not tolerate it without consequences.

You see she’s not asking you to make her decisions for her, she’s looking for emotional support and a somewhat constant reinforcement of care and love with your consistent involvement in how you communicate. Now go back and reread this paragraph at least three times, and take notes… no hi-liter on the monitor please.

Why does she want these things?Because as a woman the most sensual and powerful attractant that draws her to you as her man is her respect for you.

No, forget it, it’s not your pride and joy swinging between your legs, she would happily settle for a less endowed man if there is such a thing. It’s not your magical fingers that she enjoys so much. No, it’s not those things that you do with your tongue either. All those things are icing, the real cake is the leadership that you can, or rightfully should provide her as a man. She wants to respect you. She also wants you to respect her, but you already knew that, she’s probably screamed it at you a hundred times.

The good news here if you so choose, you can take action to insure that she never screams at you again, well she might, once.

What brings these things out in a woman?
Simple, if you didn’t notice she’s different from you. No, not just those spots. She thinks differently than you do. Much of what goes on in her mind can become a mix of uncontrollable emotions that build up to an intolerable level, she’s not happy, she might be confused, she wants you to help her.

She does know what she wants, she wants to let all of it go with a good cry. She wants to be leaning on your shoulder, telling you everything, sobbing and clearing her head and heart of all the pent up emotions and unsaid things.

Having you listen, having you forgiver her, having you tell her it will all be alright. In other words dim-wit… she wants you to spank her.

No, not sensual play although she might like that too. She wants a real old fashioned over the knee, you’re going to remember this for a long, long time and never do it again butt stinging, bottom throbbing cheek burning spanking.

However before you even think about giving her what she wants and needs you really do need to know how to do it right. No, you do not. Pay attention and do some other research elsewhere too. If you do it wrong, it will make things much worse and you’ll never be able to explain it to the domestic relations people.

Now you have to be asking yourself why in the world would a woman who you’ve committed to protecting want you to cause her pain?
Well, she doesn’t really want you to cause her pain, she doesn’t want to be hurt at all. In fact if you do it properly she will be kicking, crying, screaming and begging you to stop, but you can not. She knows it’s going to be painful for her and an experience that she in fact really doesn’t want to have.

She does however know that it does have to happen for the sake of the relationship. She knows that her sore bottom will bring a rush of tears and eventually a flood of emotions out that will give her a much needed release. Ultimately she will gain a new found respect for the man who loves her enough to spank her for her own good and the good of your relationship.

What is all this?
It doesn’t really matter what name you give it though this is commonly known as Loving Domestic Discipline, often just called LDD or DD. It borrows some terms and methods from BDSM, but that’s about where the connection ends. There are limitless variations and some refer to it as being "Taken in Hand" or TIH. Often associated with the Queen’s English way of referring to these actions, such as "Her husband’s reacted to the incident when he promptly took matters in hand". Many believe that there are both subtle and strong difference between LDD and TIH, but I won’t have that discussion here.

There are also many faith based participants who may refer to themselves as practicing Christian Domestic Discipline. Why not pick up the bible and check out Ephesians Chapter 5 verse 21 onward. Some call it a Traditional Marriage, that’s right just like Ricky taking Lucy over his knee for being irresponsible or John Wayne giving Maureen O’Hara a well deserved attitude adjustment.

What is it not?
As you read the hundreds of works available on the Internet you will likely find hundreds of opinions on this. Whatever it’s worth, this really is not a licensed subsidiary of BDSM. You may or may not have had experience with BDSM, it really is a very large, broad label that covers what seams to be a limitless number of activities.

For many, BDSM often involves pleasure gained by giving discipline or being disciplined, binding or being bound, enjoying the heightened pleasure brought on by the flow of endorphins usually in response to pain. Arousal from getting or giving power, authority or pain, it doesn’t need a reason other than exploring the mutual desires of the participants.Often BDSM is role play or exploring fantasies that work toward the goal of satisfying a fetish or even just heightened sexual pleasure.

The goal of Loving DD is not the pursuit of the next orgasm, the goal and attainable result of LDD is a stronger relationship between you and your partner. Many couples after discipline do actually find themselves moving to the bedroom but the heightened sexual desire that your mate will likely display is the result of the stronger sense of security and from receiving you after-care.

Properly delivered, after an effective spanking she will be crying profusely but craving your embrace.
The craving for a sense of security from your leadership and approval drives her need. As a man your natural instinct is to spread your seed, as a woman her basic instinct compels her to a man who she believes to be strong enough to protect both her and her family.

That doesn’t mean that you and your partner can’t weave in certain aspects of BDSM into TTWD (This Thing We Do). That is of course completely up to each couple just how, when, where and the why incidents or actions require attention. Many couple who practice DD insist that there be no aspect of sexual play before or after Punishment or Discipline spankings. Every couple is different and your mileage may vary, you need to discuss these items and what expectations you each may have in detail.

Spanko
Could it be that the reason my woman wants to be spanked is that she just gets some kinky pleasure from being spanked? Well in all honesty, maybe.

Some women and some men do derive sexual excitement at the thought of being spanked. But if that’s all she wanted, that’s all she would have asked for.

This certainly didn't happen overnight. She may very well have been harboring fantasies of being taken and being spanked by a strong man for decades. Or, this may have been a recent discovery from something she may have read on the Internet, but still not an overnight impulsive awakening. She has probably lied awake at night for hours trying to imagine how she could even begin a conversation with you about this subject. There are many stigmas that are attached to spanking, consider forgetting them all and remember this woman loves you and wants your relationship to not only survive but grow ever stronger.

Surveys have suggested that possibly as much as 40% of adults in the United States practice some sort of consensual spanking activity in the privacy of their homes. There are many variations from light butt slaps during sex play to what could be described as nothing less than the infliction of intense pain.

No matter what, she probably will be sexually aroused by the thought of you spanking her. Many women who actively practice a DD lifestyle with their mate report that the thought of their significant other taking action is what excites them, not the pain.

The bottom line so to speak, she has opened her heart to you. This likely is her deepest most precious secret and the only reason she has revealed this all to you is because she has an intense love for you and wants to open those secrets to you. She wants to trust you knowing that no matter what you won't laugh, you will listen.

Rules and Contracts
Some couples write out formal contracts that are always subject to revision, others establish a list of boundaries or simple rules and consequences. You must jointly decide how you establish rules and consequences, it’s her responsibility to obey them and it’s your responsibility to enforce the consequences with consistency and fairness.

How to Spank OTK (Over the Knee)
Schedule some private time where you can practice and exchange feelings and thoughts. Discuss basic rules and how they need to be enforced. Plan for that private time to include an actual practice spanking, take your time and discuss all reactions.She probably knows exactly how it has to happen, and could very well be hiding implements that she's been collecting that she imagines you will possibly spank her with.

However, the most effective implement that you need to learn how to use first, is your bare hand. If you start off tyring to smack her ass with your bare hand as hard as you can... Your hand will only last about five or six smacks before it's more sore than her ass.

Find a nice chair or edge of the bed and have a comfortable seat if you're going to make her seat uncomfortable. Lead her over your lap and rub your target, telling her you love her and that's why she's going to be spanked.

Start off slow and light, build a rhythm and use a loose floppy wrist and fingers. Before too long her ass will start to burn warm from the sting. She'll likely try to reach back to protect her poor vulnerable ass as the spanking begins to become effective; Don't let her, one of you will end up with broken fingers that way. Hold her wrist into the shallow of her back which will likely force her ass up for better target access.

Progress in stages with breaks to rest your hand. Your comfort is paramount if the spanking is going to last long enough to be effective. Her comfort isn't quite as important, but she can't be so uncomfortable as to be distracted. The spanking needs to be the only thing that should be on her mind besides the actions that got her in this position.

For the second inning lift her dress or pull down her pants leaving only her thin panties for protection. Then, perhaps for the third inning, pull down her panties far enough to frame your target and give you an unfettered view of your handiwork.

Sooner or later her legs will begin to kick rather furiously, swing your free leg over both of hers to insure she stays put for all the action you have planned.

Remember, you are not spanking her ass, you are spanking her brain. Her ass is nothing more than a very effective conduit to the brain... Scold.

Scold effectively and not in a condescending fashion; Scold honestly without embellishment so keep it real and not contrived otherwise it's just role play and she didn't ask for that.

Pay attention now, this is important, consider this a sport and that you need to practice. Assume that you will not start until you know all the plays and all the rules.Some important rules you two need to discuss:

Never spank her while you are angry... Think corner time, or tomorrow.
Never, ever let alcohol cloud your senses (or other diversions) when there will be a punishment spanking
Never spank with an implement you're not familiar with
Never spank without being completely aware of her reactions... Lights on!
Never spank when you are not capable of forgiveness.
Never spank without her knowing why
Never spank without her full consent, use a "Safe Word" or at least a "Health Word"
Never spank without knowing she agrees it's deserved and you're right to do so.
Never spank above the hip.

Keep in mind that most women (and men) who want Domestic Discipline in their relationship have a paradox in their brains with two basic concerns:

Her first major concern is that you won't be willing or able to spank her long enough and hard enough enough to bring her to tears and give her a life changing cathartic experience.
Her second major concern is that you will be willing and able to spank her long enough and hard enough enough to bring her to tears and give her a life changing cathartic experience

So, keep in mind she may be both craving and afraid of a spanking that will leave her bottom sore and tender for hours and possibly even sore for days. You can't start off that way though. If that's what she's craving you need to work toward those possibly more severe spankings gradually. She, and you may want her bottom to be intensely sore, but you must never hurt her. She wants this and it scares her, she doesn't want to experience this from you, she wants to experience this with you.

There might be times she refuses to be spanked, that's ok, it's her right to revoke your spanking permit. If this should happen she will have to decide if DD is what she really wanted all along and if so, under what context and rules. There's nothing wrong with taking s break.

Why spanking?
There may very well be times that you don’t even have to spank your partner if that’s what’s right for you and your partner at the time.

Many couples integrate other forms of punishment into their LDD relationship. Restriction of privileges or writing lines are other popular punishments, they won’t bring the instant rush of tears that a good spanking will. They will however remind her of your authority, the authority that she freely and willingly gives you. Remember that behavior is not in the butt, the butt is simply a very effective conduit to the brain. The required submission, humiliation and sting of a spanking are all pointed at the brain.

Fairness and Consistency
Trust and Communication are absolutely paramount as you move together to this lifestyle.

This isn’t a one way street, it happens with her consent. That’s right, she’s giving you permission to control her behavior, and she has the right to revoke it at any time. That’s not likely to happen unless you fail to do your job properly and that’s with fairness and consistency.

As you begin to research this topic you will notice that many women who are in DD relationships have one basic need from their HOH (Head of Household, that’s you sport) and it’s consistency,

I can not stress that enough. You just can not spank her bottom one time and the next time the same thing happens say "we’ll just let it go this time". You may be thinking that you want to let it go because you’re just too tired to do anything about it right now. You can not ever do that, because she’ll be thinking you just don’t care enough to do anything about it or put enough effort into protecting your relationship
.
Gotta Listen.
Keep the talk going all the time, don’t try to provide solutions during conversation, probe and when she says something ask her what that means to her. Men when presented with a point by a woman immediately try to think of a solution. Guess what guy, she doesn’t want you to solve all her dilemmas, but she does want you to hear them and understand them from her perspective. You’ll certainly need to learn to tell the difference, the answer won’t always be trip over your knee, often the answer is simple empathic listening.

So who holds you responsible?
You do, you will have to live your life to a higher standard.

Put the Donald Duck jamies out with the next yard sale and grow up. It’s time to let go of ol’ Teddy, it’s time to be a man there big guy. What if you make a mistake? Don’t make it again. You are allowed to make mistakes if you can learn from them. That’s the whole point, we are all human, the difference is that as a man you need to make sure that you always learn from your mistakes. As a woman your partner needs to know that she too has to learn from her mistakes and needs to know that if she doesn’t learn, you will not hesitate to hold her accountable.

Doesn’t seem fair does it?
Well for a very few couples it’s not.

The man just might find himself over his ladies knee someday too. Stop grinning, if you are one of those couples you just might find yourself unable to walk or sit comfortably for a day or two… or more.

Bouncing around on the Internet you are likely to find a thing called "The Spencer Plan", not sure if it’s real or fake, but there are actually couples that follow some form of household similar to it. Allegedly composed by a woman doctor in the early half of the 20th century the Spencer Plan states that a wife must always be spanked bare hand while a husband must always be whipped with a leather strap or paddle. This justice is administered for infractions determined by their contracts to one another.

So you’re not worried are you big guy?
The petite little woman will never be able to swing one of those big fraternity paddles. Don’t bet on it! Those things aren’t really all that heavy and just because she never played baseball, doesn’t mean that old battle-axe gym teacher she had, Ms. Ironbuns, didn’t teach her how to swing a bat for softball. Also those men who have been on the receiving end in such relationships can attest to the astonishing power hidden in that little hairbrush on her dressing table.

Oh, and be sure to watch your mouth in the kitchen if you see her reaching for a spatula or wooden spoon too.

Do you remember those old fashioned cartoons you watched on TV as a kid? Remember the wife swinging the rolling pin over her head as she chased her poor husband down the street? Well, the ol’ girl wasn’t stupid. She had no intention of giving the bread winner a life threatening concussion, she wanted a life altering experience for her man. She had a softer target in mind about three feet lower, and he knew it, which is why he ran like a bat from Hades.

What has the concept of LDD done for me?
It has taught me what was missing from my marriage, and why it failed. It has taught me that the emotions that so fill a woman’s soul, the things that define her femininity are the hardest things that she deals with, and sometimes she just needs a release. She needs her man, to be a man.